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Conquering Fear

Introduction

“I gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in

which I must stop and look fear in the face... . I say to myself, I’ve

lived through this and can take the next thing that comes along... .

We must do the things we think we cannot do.” — Eleanor Roosevelt

What is fear?

Webster’s Dictionary defines fear as:

To be afraid of : expect with alarm

To be afraid or apprehensive

An unpleasant often strong emotion caused by anticipation or awareness of

danger (1) : An instance of this emotion (2) : a state marked by this

emotion.

There seems to be as many types of fear or at it’s worst, phobia, as the

number of situations we humans find ourselves in.

Personally, I’ve experienced the fears of:

Not being good enough

Heights

Rejection

Saying the wrong thing

Abandonment

Failure

Success

And many more.

How about you? Have you ever been really afraid?

Sure you have. We all have, at one time or another experienced fear and in

some cases absolute terror.

Is fear a bad thing?

In many cases it’s not. Isn’t it fear that makes us look both ways before

crossing a busy street? Isn’t it fear of injury or death that makes most of us

use seat belts when we drive?

Conquering Fear

There are many examples of fear being a useful and sometimes life saving

tool in the face of potential danger.

There are also those fears that paralyze us. Fears that make us hesitate

when we should move and stop us from doing things that could ultimately

benefit our lives.

For instance, perhaps you were thinking of starting your own business, but

couldn’t get past the perfectly normal fears and uncertainties that accompany

such a major life change.

I'm afraid of failing.

I can’t risk the money.

I’m afraid of what my family and friends will say.

Can I really do this?

You get the picture. Have you ever gone through this meat grinder of the

mind? Probably. I have too and it isn’t pleasant.

So, why is it that some people seem to be able to meet these types of fear

head on and manage to overcome them? Are these people so different then

you and I? Is there something in their makeup that we’re somehow lacking?

Here are two illustrations of what I’m talking about…

In the classic science fiction epic, “Dune”, by Frank Herbert, is a term that

has always gripped my imagination. The term is “fear is the mind killer”.

In an early part of the story, Paul Atreides, the only son of Duke Leto

Atreides, is summoned by his mother. She has a very important visitor. Her

visitor is the Mother Superior of the Bene Gesserit Order, of which Paul’s

mother is a Priestess.

The reason for his summons becomes apparent when Paul is led to a table,

on which sits an ordinary looking green box, with a hole in the top. The hole

is big enough to fit Paul’s hand.

Paul is instructed to put his hand into the box. When he asks what the box

contains, he’s told ‘pain’. He’s told to insert his hand. Paul wants to believe

that his mother wouldn’t allow anything to harm him, but he also knows the

power of the Bene Gesserit Order and the devotion his mother has toward it’s

goals. Paul rightly deduces that his future might depend on the choices he

makes right now.

Paul approaches the box and recites to himself an exercise taught him by his

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martial arts trainer. It begins with:

“I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little death that brings

total obliteration. I will face my fear... I will permit it to pass over me and

through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its
path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.

”

Do you face your fear? Do you permit your fear to pass over and through

you? Are you able to defeat it? Or do you, like so many others allow the fear

to defeat you?

Here’s another example:

In the third installment of the Indiana Jones Trilogy, (The Last Crusade), Indi

finds himself standing at the edge of a bottomless chasm. He’s been told

there’s a way across, but he sees none.

Indi knows that he must get to the other side or his father will die. So, he

steps out, disregarding the common human fear of falling to a horrifying

death.

His courage and faith are rewarded when his foot descends into what looks

like thin air but falls upon a bridge. The bridge across the precipice has been

hidden by optical illusion.

These are fictional characters, of course, confronting fictional obstacles, but

don’t we all face the fear of what’s around the next corner? What will happen

if I make the wrong decisions? Will my business be a success? Can I really

succeed? If I am a success, can I handle it? Am I good enough to compete?

Fear of the unknown.

What we do when faced with these “fear” situations, often determines how

we step into our future. Do we walk in fear because we are unable to accept

risk and failure?

Can we trust enough in our dreams and abilities to make that all important

first step through and beyond the fear? Do we have enough faith in

ourselves?

“Fear is the mind killer.” Fear can also be the killer of hopes and dreams.

What you are about to read are the extraordinary stories of some of the most

successful men and women on the Internet today and also some everyday

men and women, like you and me.

Conquering Fear

They have agreed to bare their souls to you, in order to help you understand

they have all come, at one point or another, to stand before the precipice. To

risk the pain of failure.

They’ll tell you their stories and explain how they managed to look their fears

in the eye and take that step beyond the fear and into the unknown.

Are they a different breed? Is it something genetic that allows some to move

on and others to freeze?

What have you done when faced with the fear of failure, or the fear of taking

a risk? Have you, like so many, been frozen into inaction by the thought of

what might happen in the future?

We should all thank these remarkable people for being kind and generous

enough to share stories that show, among other things, that they are all too

human, just like the rest of us.

The difference? Their willingness to move ahead, when many of us would

hesitate, and in our hesitation lose the opportunities waiting for us, right

there, on the other side of the chasm.

All we need do is take that first step. As frightening as it may seem. That one

small leap of faith.

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“Dreams, visions, ideas can play significant roles in our lives.

They can entice, entertain, or inspire us to greatness. To

bring them into reality, however, we must act! Cowardice

and lack of faith can keep one from a chosen goal, but if

the heart is strong and brave, you can add action to your

dreams and make them real.” — Sir John Templeton

Conquering Fear

Rick Beneteau

Rick graduated high school and went directly into business managing a dry-

cleaning shop that he eventually bought and built into successful multi-store

operation. Involved in the music and advertising industries throughout this

time, Rick was responsible for the creation of many national advertising

jingles and still consults larger companies on convention production. An

internationally recorded and released songwriter, he sold his dry-cleaning

business in 1991 to pursue these other interests which included overseeing

the start-up of Ocean Records Canada.

In late 1996, Rick logged on to the Internet for the very first time. The

challenge to conquer what he refers to as the "Wild, Wild Web" was too great

to resist. 1998 found him one of the pioneers of the 2-Tier Affiliate Program

now so prominent on the Internet with the highly touted and successful I.D.

IT! Plates Partner Program. He also began writing business articles in a style

still not seen very often on the Internet. His friendly, wit-driven articles soon

filled the pages of most of the prominent ezines and newsletters. Rick's first

e-book entitled "The Ezine Marketing Machine" was released October/99 and

has since become an Internet-wide best-seller. Rick has just released what is

destined to remain another top-seller, Branding YOU and Breaking the Bank.

The New Millennium finds the 47 year-old busy with the growing of his

Internet company, Interniche.net , his "E-chievement" Ezine - The Mirror, his

two powerful 2-Tier Affiliate Programs - EZineMoney , BrandingYourself.com,

Power-Publicity and the I.D. IT! Plates Partner Program as well as the start

up of 2 new affiliate programs.

Know No Fear!!

The Greatest Wonders of the World we'll never know for they were destroyed

before they were even built by the great enemy of man - Fear!

That's my take on Fear but here's some notable and famous quotes:

"Our deepest Fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest

Fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness

that most frightens us."

Nelson Mandella from his inaugural speech

And one of the most insightful figures of all time sums up Fear in his normally

humoristic manner:

"I have been through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually

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happened."

Mark Twain

Perhaps the most famous quote of all about Fear, and the one that hits home

hardest with me, is this:

"The only thing we have to Fear is Fear itself."

Franklin D. Roosevelt

I will continue along the thoughts of what is a most profound truth about

Fear:

"To live with Fear and not be afraid is the final test of maturity."

Edward Weeks

The reason I decided to use "quotes" throughout this article is to fortify the

fact that Fear is nothing but an Illusion.

It is imagined, as a dream is. But at least we wake up from a dream. Most

people fall into Fear and remain frozen in its giant grasp all their lives! They

either live in a constant state of paralyzing Fear or they have lowered their

expectations to a level that they never feel Fear because they have "learned"

not to risk and grow. How sad!

Fear is the minds great mortal sin.

And isn't it just at times when you have to risk something, that you Fear?

Think about it! You've had a great idea but you don't tell a soul because

you're afraid THEY won't think it's great. You've had long time aspirations to

change careers but you cower at the mere thought of getting out of your

Comfort Zone and out from under the safety net you've created for yourself

(your job, your security, your routine). You've always wanted to start a

business but the thought of putting together a business plan, getting

financing and the unknown quantity of the income you'll receive scares the

hell out of you!

How many opportunities have you allowed to slip by because you were frozen

by Fear?

Do you know more about the things you Fear than the things you desire?

Is the Fear of failure your biggest Fear of all?

Recognizing Fear!

Conquering Fear

Not a single person has ever accomplished anything of significance without

first feeling scared to death!

You recognize your own tell tale signs of Fear. Might be a knot in your gut. Or

a high state of anxiety. A flood of negative thoughts rush in and all the

reasons NOT to do something hover over you like an ominous black cloud!

The truth is, behind that cloud lay bright beautiful sunlight ready to nourish

and grow your idea.

Fear is a loaded gun squarely aimed to slay you and all your potential. You

need to be on-guard every waking moment to deflect the invisible bullet.

"Fear is the oldest and strongest emotion of mankind."

H. P. Lovecraft

Fear is the cancer of the human spirit.

Confronting Fear!

How many times have you had to, say, appear publicly to speak at a meeting

or wedding, or attend traffic court, and you were just consumed by dreaded

thoughts of the pending event for days in advance? And when it was all over,

a huge burden was lifted from your shoulder? The event went wonderfully

without a hitch.

That folks, is the false load of Fear you "allowed" to invade and dominate

your mind. All for nothing and what needless suffering and a complete waste

of life energy!

Fear is the imaginary mountain that hides the horizon.

The moment you feel Fear - face it - and eject it - instantly!

Every time you feel the invisible foe injecting it's venom into your thoughts -

STOP!! And YOU re-take control of your thinking process. Outa here! Fear is

false, and evil! What you imagine will never come to pass. That's ALWAYS the

reality so why even think those thoughts?

Learn and practice this, for when has what you Feared ever become your

reality?

Fear is the greatest inhibitor to the progress of mankind.

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"Fear is excitement without breath."

Robert Heller

Conquering Fear!

You and I will always feel Fear. The key is to not feel it for long. Split seconds

of time actually. It's a matter of twisting the irrational emotion into a usable

force for the betterment of our own lives.

Make Fear your Motivator! The moment you begin to feel Fear, immediately

turn it into the fuel you need to keep your fire raging! You feel Fear almost

always when something is "worthy" of the invading of your comfort zone.

Like risk for a much greater gain! Begin to recognize that the dark feeling of

Fear is in almost all cases a prelude to a brighter future.

Look at it this way, if you DON'T feel Fear over a particular situation, then it's

not significant enough to warrant your consideration. That's how powerful an

indicator Fear is! And that's all Fear should ever be!

At most, let Fear be but just that momentary Storm before the Calm. USE

Fear instead of allowing it to use YOU.

Let Fear Fortify, not cripple you!

"Do the thing you Fear to do and keep on doing it... that is the quickest and

surest way ever yet discovered to conquer Fear."

Dale Carnegie

"Fear is met and destroyed with courage."

James F. Bell

Fear and Ice Cream?

If we only opened our minds a little more often we would see a limitless

source of strength in our children. Children are wise beyond belief as they

Know No Fear! I ask you to take a little more of your time right now to read

the true story of a brave young girl named Teri. The Ice Cream 'Comb' Story

is very close to my heart and a continual source of strength for me. See, the

story is about my daughter:

mailto:icecream@interniche.net?subject=TheIceCreamCombStory

The Ice Cream Comb Story is also included at the back of this eBook.

Fear and Prayer?

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I wish to close this article by sharing with you what I believe is the "required

equipment" to fight and beat Fear once and for all. Essentially, that is a core

belief system centered on those things we both deserve and should strive for.

I was able to express how I felt about this in an article called The

Entrepreneurs Prayer, which I invite you to not only read, but also really

think about:

mailto:prayer@interniche.net?subject=TheEntrepreneursPrayer

The Entrepreneur’s Prayer is also included at the back of this eBook.

I can not express how I feel about Fear, or rather the freedom of living

without Fear, more effectively than E. E. Eddison:

"He without Fear is king of the world."

My wish for you is to Know No Fear!

Be Fearless, and Flourish!

2002 Rick Beneteau

Rick is the highly acclaimed author of 3 top-selling eBooks:

http://www.interniche.net/ebooks.htm

He is also the purveyor of those famous 'traveling billboards'

called I.D. IT! Plates:

http://www.iditplates.net

Subscribe FREE to Rick's popular E-chievement Ezine -

The Mirror:

Mailto:subscribe@themirrorezine.com

Conquering Fear

Robin Bryant

Today is April 7

. My 29

birthday. Three weeks ago I was diagnosed with

MS (Multiple Sclerosis).

I was told that I’ve had it since I was 18 years of age. My fear is that I will

die young and leave my 9 year old daughter without a mother.

I have just overcome cervical cancer 2 years ago and now I was hit with this.

It is very scary, but I am overcoming the fear and fighting with everything I

have.

I have been in a wheelchair since October of 2001 but in one week I will have

braces and will be able to walk and out of the wheelchair.

I take life day by day now and cherish every moment I have with my family.

Conquering Fear

Sheila Cain

Wow! I'm not alone out there.

I've been on the Internet trying to make money most of the time since early

1997. I tried a lot of things and failed miserably at all. It wasn't that I

wasn't smart or didn't have the drive. It was my horrible fear of rejection.

One very costly program that I was in (that ruined me financially) seemed to

make that fear I had even worse.

My "self-proclaimed" mentor made it an almost daily practice to beat me up

by email. Nothing was ever good enough. I was told that I would never

have what it takes to make it. And I started buying into his B.S.

I grew up (at a less than tender age) just trying to pull myself out of the

financial disaster that I had let fear get me into.

Well....NO MORE! I'm a little older and a lot wiser. I'm not afraid to send out

follow ups, in fear that I might offend someone. I'm like, so what if I get

rejected on my offer, it has nothing to do with me personally. And not just

in the Internet Business, but in LIFE!

My fear taught me that there is no reason to worry about things you have no

control over anyway. What's gonna happen (like rejection) is gonna happen.

So I got over it.

Thanks for letting me vent on this.

Sheila Cain

Conquering Fear

Asunta Covelli

Hello, here is the story of my fears:

I had a fear of the elevator ever since I was a small child. Afraid that I would

get stuck and no one would ever find me. My mind made me believe that the

elevator would start going out of control going at rapid speeds up and down

without stopping, flames would spark and I would starve to death in there

dehydrate, loose oxygen due to no circulation of air and die, So I avoided

elevators for years and took the stairs. Even if I had to walk 40 flights I

would do it.

Until one day, I took the stairs as usual and something happened. There

were endless stairs , it seemed like more than one hundred flights of them.

When I got to the level I needed to exit at, the door was locked and would

not open. So I began going down flight by flight and all the doors in the

stairwell were locked, you could open them to get in the stair well but they all

locked from behind you, and you couldn’t get back out. I began to sweat, I

couldn’t breath, I was dying of thirst, and crying. About a half an hour later I

began banging on the door screaming until someone finally heard me, and

opened the door, I was released.

It was then that I realized it did not matter if I was in the elevator or not,

anything can happen anywhere at anytime and I am not in control of these

situations. By being subjected to a form of my worst fear I was forced to face

it.

By facing my fear it also made me realize that I need to concentrate on what

to do in a situation rather than anticipating the end. I now can go inside

elevators, but before I do I remind myself that there is an emergency alarm

button in the elevator if I get stuck and it helps.

Conquering Fear

Scott Covert

Scott Covert was born in Peterborough, a mostly harmless city 80 miles east

of Toronto, Ontario. His stumbling direct marketing journeys began in 1990

when he graduated from University, and finally culminated in the discovery of

how to use banner ads to help his clients make money from their websites

(over $2,500,000 so far):

http://www.banneradmagic.com

and more recently creating

http://www.freemarketingvideos.com

to de-mystify common Internet

marketing tools in the form of video tutorials which the public can download

and watch for free.

I believe that all human decisions are emotional decisions. It's not only

important to understand that as a marketer, trying to convince people to

make decisions, but it's also important to "know thyself" when it comes to

emotions.

I've had fear loom over me many times in my entrepreneurial career. But the

even greater fear, which was always WORSE, was the fear of a lifetime of

working for other people and ending up with nothing for myself. So you

might say one fear eventually conquered the other.

The very last time I had a job was in 1993. When the job ended, I had the

fear of not being able to replace my income with my self-employment

income. That fear turned out to be true, more or less. Eventually I was faced

with the daunting fear of having to move back in with my parents in

Peterborough because I could not afford to live in Toronto. This also came

true (health problems created primarily by stress played a huge role). Moving

back in with my parents in turned out to be a blessing in disguise, as I

immediately had a "miraculous" recovery in several aspects of my health.

AND, 2 weeks after I moved back, I woke up one morning with my appendix

possibly near the bursting point. Unlike Toronto, I had people around me to

take me to a hospital right away when my life could have been on the line.

Funny how the things you fear can turn out to be no big deal - perhaps a

blessing in disguise - or even save your life. Or simply help you along some

detours you didn't even realize you NEEDED to take, to get to your own

definition of "a successful life".

In the end, by mid-1998 my fear of spending a lifetime working for other

people had won the day - it had been stronger than all my other fears. I was

making more money than I ever had before, moved into an apartment, met

Conquering Fear

Jim Edwards

Jim Edwards is a dynamic and entertaining speaker who has developed,

marketed and operated outrageously profitable online businesses for both

himself and his clients worldwide since 1997.

Jim writes

http://www.TheNetReporter.com

, a syndicated newspaper column

helping “non-technical” people use the Internet for both fun and massive

profits!

Jim is a frequent guest speaker nationally at conferences and seminars on

such subjects as search engine and directory traffic generation, “shoestring

online marketing” and more.

He is the author and co-creator of numerous highly successful e-books and

“info-products”, including:

"The Lazy Man's Guide to Online Business"

How to Work Less... get Paid More... and have tons more Fun! Learn the

Super “Lazy Achiever” Mindset!

http://www.getmoredonefaster.com

"How to Write and Publish your own eBook... in as little as 7 Days"

"How to write and publish your own OUTRAGEOUSLY Profitable eBook in as

little as 7 days - even if you can't write, can't type and failed high school

English class!"

http://www.7dayebook.com

“33 Days to Online Profits"

Finally, the First Practical, Step-By-Step, Roadmap for Internet Success No

Matter What Product or Service You Sell... 100% Guaranteed!"

http://www.33daystoonlineprofits.com

“Selling Your Home Alone”

http://www.fsbohelp.com

“The TEN Dirty Little Secrets of Mortgage Financing”

http://www.mortgageloantips.com

Jim lives in Williamsburg, Virginia with his wife and four dogs. He enjoys

writing, walking, traveling and listening to Frank Sinatra and Willie Nelson

CD’s.

Overcoming the fear of “Putting out a lot of effort and getting no reward”

Conquering Fear

One of the biggest fears I've had to overcome in marketing online and

building my Internet businesses from zero to a nice full time living is the fear

of expending hours, days, weeks and sometimes even months of effort on a

particular project and having all that effort go to waste! My fear is that I’ll go

through all this work, ignore my family, skip doing fun things and then, when

I’m supposed to reap the benefits, nothing will happen. It will have all gone

for nothing.

Despite your best efforts at preparation and research, when you create a

quality ebook, online course, e-class or some other online business, you do

take a risk that the effort you expend may not come back to you the way you

want it to - specifically in the form of money or more business! Sure, there

are certain things, such as market and consumer research, you can do to

reduce your risk and thus your fears. But ultimately, just like any business,

there is risk. In this case, you are risking your time and money that you will

be able to create a product and market it in such a way that you will make

back all your money and produce a large profit for the amount of time

invested.

The problem is that if you only have a very limited amount of time to invest

in your business, say only an hour or two in the evening, the perceived risk is

even higher. Why? Because in one or two hours a night you can usually only

devote your time to one project… and this creates an urgency or a feeling of

“that project better make it or else!”

That “make it or break it” urgency creates feelings of fear that can immobilize

you.

When I was working 50 to 55 hours a week for somebody else, it was hard to

get myself over the fear of potentially wasting the free time I could spend

with my family. At times this fear of “wasting” time (I didn’t look on it as

“investing” time back then) and not getting anything in return was so

overwhelming that it paralyzed me from taking any action at all.

I don't know when the transformation happened, but the way I overcame this

fear (and the way I overcome it to this day) is to find many different positive

outcomes for every action I take. I look at my time as an “investment” and I

list off as many different ways I’ll benefit as possible by passing through my

fear with positive action.

Doing so takes away the "gambling" feeling of devoting my time to

something I'm expecting (or need) a huge pay off from. I know I’ll get some

great rewards for taking action because I’ve listed them all off.

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When I write an ebook I fully expect to make tens-of-thousands of dollars

over the course of the book’s lifetime. But I also know that an ebook can

flop, despite the best research and market study efforts. So now, when I set

out to write in ebook, an article, or even just take the time to help someone

with a lot of extra effort that doesn't have a guaranteed payoff, I start by

making a list of all the benefits I know I will receive. This eliminates all fear

in me and builds a strong sense of anticipation that actually makes me attack

the problem or task that much faster and energetically.

Let's say for example I’m writing an ebook that I'm not 100% certain will sell

in huge numbers. I’ve done all the research and I’ve done all the market

studies and my gut tells me I should move forward. When I move forward I

know that the worst thing that will happen is that I will __________.

Whatever it is I just fill in the blank.

It might be that I will learn some new skills I can apply to my business. It

might be that I will create content that at least my subscribers can benefit

from. Whatever it is… I know I will get a compelling outcome from the effort.

One of my favorite ways to overcome this fear is to say right up front, "this

will make the basis of a great article for my subscribers". I know that no

matter what happens, I can write up the results and share them with my

subscribers as an excellent value-added article they can use to make their

business better. Distributing this type of content always helps my business

and builds my reputation with them.

So if you ever find yourself gripped by the fear of expending lots of effort and

not getting anything in return, simply list off all the different rewards you'll

get from making a quality effort… and you will surely obtain many of them.

In reality, all those “rewards” will motivate you to take all the steps

necessary in order to obtain those rewards you’ve pictured so clearly in your

head. You’ll build up such emotional momentum that, in the vast majority of

cases, not only will you overcome your fear, but you will surpass the goals

you set for yourself! You’ll even surpass that huge goal that made you afraid

to take effort in the first place.

It happens to me all the time.

The solution is to get your mind off the fear and on to all the rewards of

taking quality, consistent, immediate action on the thing you're afraid of

risking your valuable time on. I find this technique works especially well for

Conquering Fear

Frank Garon

I spent over 15 years driving a truck for a living. My wife and I spent over

$10,000 trying all kinds of different home based businesses. Nothing worked.

We wound up going bankrupt before things got better.

But, once we got exposed to the correct way to do Internet Marketing, things

changed fast.

I was able to quit my job, and come home to work full time on August the

4th, 1997. I went from making $14.25 an hour to making over $130,000 a

year - not bad for someone who went broke at one point.

Now, let me say this - after going thru all I did, I am the last person in the

world who is going to try to rip you off, or give you bad advice.

I am an average person who figured out all this crazy Internet stuff - and I

am very happy to share what I know with you. You won't get hype or a big

sales pitch.

My fear of the telephone, speaking to people and my fear of rejection,

especially in Network Marketing could have broken me. I had to get

past it.

To this day I hate calling leads, but that's the business and it's making

me a ton of money. Fear is good. Fear keeps you from getting electrocuted.

Fear keeps you from doing stupid things, but you can't let fear paralyze

you either.

I never knew that I could do this. The fact that I'm actually here doing this

is a goof because I'm nobody special. As a matter of fact, the only thing

special about me is that I didn't quit. I did not give up. I didn't talk myself

out of it. That's all I did differently.

Fear is always with you. I have a fear that this might all be over with

tomorrow. I have a fear that my brand of selling and relating to people

might not always work. I have a fear that my own limitations, my way

of doing things might actually be slowing me down. I have a ton of

fears.

You're always going to have fear. You make your piece with it, you deal with

it and then you just move on. I mean some of the biggest heroes have been

the most frightened at the time they became heroes.

I mean look at Niki Lauda, the formula one race car driver. In a race in

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Germany in 1976, his car spun out and hit a wall. The car caught fire and he

was basically deep fried. They thought he was going to die. He was scarred

and disfigured. Here's a guy that was on death's door and three weeks later

he was back racing.

If you want a guy to look up to as hero, that guy had to be scared to death to

get back in that car, but he did it. Then, not only did he get back in that race

car, but in his first race it was raining and he stopped the car. He said he

didn't feel safe doing it and that he wasn't going to finish the race. Which

took more guts? Getting back in the car only three weeks after he was almost

burned to death, or having the courage to stop in the middle of the race

because he didn't feel comfortable under those conditions?

Or take someone like Thomas Edison. Do you know how many inventions

he came up with? Do you know how many people told him he was nuts and

no good?

Or my grandmother, who raised five kids on her own, back in the 1950's

when most people in her situation would have given the kids up to the

foster care system. These are the kinds of people I look up to.

All of these people had to deal with their fears.

I'm not big on hero worship. Show me the average person who dealt with

their fears and made it big or did something with their life and that's who I'm

going to emulate.

How about Mark McGuire, the baseball player. He's not a hero for what he did

as a hitter. I look up to him because, here's a guy who found out that his

child was seriously ill. You think he didn't have fear? What he did though, was

embrace the problem and start a foundation to try to find a solution to it.

So, one thing about fear is, if you think you're the only person in the world

feeling this way, you're wrong. Look around and you'll see people who are

facing and dealing with similar or worse things every day. Reading and

learning and talking to others who are going through these feelings will help

you face your fears.

Nobody wants to talk about these things. Lets admit that we have these

feelings. Lets admit that we're scared sometimes. Let's admit that we're

vulnerable. Let's admit that we're imperfect. The more I admit my faults

and my frailties, the better I get as a person and as a businessman.

If you're in business, you've got to be about yourself and about making

money. You've got to be about putting yourself in the spotlight. You just can't

Conquering Fear

believe what pushing yourself out there creates in your life.

It goes back to when I was a truck driver. The greatest thing I ever did was

drive a truck. I was shy, quiet, never wanting to ask for anything and always

unsure of myself. But, when you're driving a truck that's hauling a 48 foot

trailer that together weigh almost 80,000 pounds, you’d better know where

you're going. You'd better have confidence in your abilities. It's a dangerous

job and you could kill somebody. I learned how to ask for help and direction

and to put myself out there.

Some people look at me and the success I've had at making money on the

Internet and call me their hero. I'm no hero.

There are lot's of people who have to have incredible courage just to get out

of bed in the morning. People like my Aunt Pat, who has MS and is confined

to wheelchair. She's got three kids. She's got dignity, she's got a sense of

humor, she's got honor and she's got family that loves her.

She stuck in that chair and odds are, she's never getting out. That's courage.

That's a true hero.

Getting back to what fears I had to face in Network Marketing, they were the

fear of the telephone, the fear of rejection and the fear of being a failure in

the eyes of my wife and kids.

So, here I was. I had all these leads to call. I thought to myself, I hate

the telephone and I hate speaking to people on it. I stood up. I paced the

floor. I was scared. Now it was push come to shove. I had to execute. I

knew if I quit I'd be a loser and I also knew if you don't quit you'll eventually

make it. You will. If you don't quit - you will make it.

It's all about perspective. Can your fears of making a phone call or of being

rejected compare to the fears of people who're facing life threatening and life

altering situations every day? Of course they can't.

So just do it and every time you do it gets easier. The fear goes away.

Frank Garon is webmaster and owner of

http://www.internetcashplanet

and

http://www.cash-giveaway.com

Conquering Fear

Frank Giambarresi

I'd love to say that my story is a one of having realized my goals in life

though having already overcome my fears. But that's not so.

If only I could say that I was well down the road of self-actualization. I mean

after sixty years of working on it, you'd think I could at least lay claim to

that.

Nope!

Did I just "Think and Grow Rich" for the first time? No, I probably did that

about 25 years ago. Did I just acquire the job skills that will propel me

toward my goals. No, I've been involved in public performance and

speaking since I was a kid.

So what was missing? Commitment? Well yes, but also one other far more

important ingredient. Conquering my most debilitating fear. Not the fear of

failure, but its even more insidious counterpart: the FEAR OF SUCCESS.

You see, I have left behind a number of failures. But I've also left a sting of

significant successes. At least they were rated as successes in other peoples

eyes. But I was AFRAID to see them as successes myself.

So I built a shell of perfectionism around my psyche to protect myself from

becoming "successful". Others could see my accomplishments as successes if

they wanted to, but I KNEW BETTER. I knew what I could have done more

completely, or more skillfully, or more whatever. And, of course, since that

was my thought mode, my subconscious played its part by helping me to do

less than what I considered acceptable.

But that was then, and this is now. At sixty, unemployed, and with nary a

nibble in the job market, I really have little choice but to carve out my own

niche in the wonderful world of entrepreneurship. Or, more correctly,

infopreneurship.

Yes, I've finally decided to believe what my speech evaluators in

Toastmasters have been telling me for several years. I've finally made a

conscious decision to believe that I really am worthy of success, and all that

comes with it. I've finally chosen to accept the trophies that I've won and the

accolades that I've attained for just what they are.

And I can now believe that this isn't some kind of false bravado, it's not an

ego trip, it's an accurate appraisal of who I am and what I am. And it is a

necessary starting point.

Conquering Fear

So last night, as part of a speech, delivered in front of an audience that

included Toastmasters district officers, I set forth a dream that I have kept

hidden for years. The dream that I will one day stand before audiences of

hundreds, and even thousands, sharing with them something that will be of

real help in their own lives.

WOW!! I actually said it. And now, of course, I MUST do it. And, I WILL

do it. Starting right now. Starting with writing a couple of special reports on

speaking and self-expression and getting something up on my new website

within the next week or so.

Not, or so, NEXT WEEK. PERIOD!!!

Right on!

Frank Giambarresi

mailto:fgiam@adelphia.net

Conquering Fear

Cathy Goodwin, Ph.D.

When the United States had a military draft, men with "4F" status were

banned from military service. Some cherished the designation while others

felt cheated out of the experience.

If you're seeking career freedom, you may feel blocked by the 3F's: Fear,

Focus and Finances -- and you can change your 3F status to the fourth F,

"Forward!"

Fear comes from giving up a cherished identity. Once you move to a new

career, you have to find a new way to say, "I am" with pride and excitement.

What will your former colleagues say? How will your family greet the new

you? And how do you feel about trading in your "senior seasoned" identity for

the role of a stumbling beginner?

The risk is real. After starting a business or spending a few years in graduate

school, you are no longer the same person. Your old career neighborhood

changes, too. Returning home may no longer be an option.

You overcome this block by learning to recognize fear as a powerful ally

rather than a threat. Work with and through the fear.

Focus requires you to choose a meaningful goal and then to avoid the siren

call of your previous life. If you have wisely chosen to remain in a job while

exploring your options, you must resist getting caught up in the politics and

reward system of a world where you are no longer a citizen. You may need to

find the inner resources to keep going, while sustaining the motivation and

excitement of your new world.

Focus requires learning time management skills and creating a career-related

support system. A coach can help you feel less alone during the early stages.

Finally, financial blocks are real, not psychological. I recommend a new way

to inventory all your resources, not just money. Sometimes a unique skill or

a dynamite network can substitute for a bulging savings account.

At the same time, face your own tolerance for financial uncertainty. Some

people sleep soundly with a zero-balance checking account, trusting the

universe to pay the rent. Others get nervous when their checking account

falls below five figures -- to the left of the decimal point.

Conquering Fear

After years of researching and working with transitioners, I believe the

complexities boil down to transforming yourself from 3-F to F-M: Forward-

Moving.

As you work through each block, you gain a powerful burst of energy and

insight. To change metaphors, think of moving a boulder off your ravel lane

on a highway. Now nothing stops you from moving full speed ahead! You

need your rear view mirror only to see how far you've come.

Cathy Goodwin, Ph.D. author, career coach, speaker

"Helping mid-career professionals move to career freedom"

http://www.movinglady.com/coaching.html

Nine magic keys to career freedom

http://www.movinglady.com/freedombook.html

Ezine: Career Freedom Ezine

mailto:subscribe@movinglady.com

Conquering Fear

“We are face to face with our destiny and we must meet it

with a high and resolute courage. For us is the life of action,

of strenuous performance of duty; let us live in the harness,

striving mightily; let us rather run the risk of wearing out

than rusting out.” — Theodore Roosevelt

Conquering Fear

John Harricharan

John is the award-winning author of the bestseller, "When You Can Walk on

Water, Take the Boat," and the creator of the ground-breaking "PowerPause"

system for success. Websites at

http://www.powerpause.com

Membership site at

http://www.enterprisingspirit.com

http://www.mindmarketing.com/picturepages.html

"Fear is Usually Frightening"

When my good friend, Bob Kleine, asked me to write a very special article

about "Fear", I readily agreed. Bob wanted me to tell his readers about a

time in my life when I experienced one of my greatest fears. Furthermore, he

asked if I could also share what I did to overcome that fear.

There are certain scenes and circumstances in life that seem to have been

arranged by others with much more intelligence than I could ever credit

myself for. One such situation was my marriage to the princess of my

dreams. From the first day that I saw her, I knew that there was a bond

between us that spanned time, distance, social position, and all earthly

obstacles.

We had met each other many years prior to our marriage. Though we were

later to be separated by great distances, we finally met again and were

married. At the time of our marriage, she was only nineteen, and the joy of

my life. Together, we built a beautiful partnership and met the ups and

downs of life with strength and determination.

With her by my side and with her constant encouragement, I was able to

create a semblance of financial security. After the children came, we were

even happier and looked forward, even more so, to the future. But sadly, the

cold winds of misfortune began to blow across our lives.

Slowly at first, and then with ever-increasing speed, I lost my business and

all of our financial security. It was as if the winter of my life had begun.

Mardai, whose very name means, "light," became the source of illumination

that guided me through the darkness that followed.

We lost our home and land and most of our material possessions. With our

two children we finally moved to a new city and started to rebuild our lives

from ground zero. I thought that we had suffered enough, but our financial

losses were nothing compared to what was to happen next. My greatest fear

had come upon me.

On a regular visit to the doctor, Mardai discovered that she had cancer. It

Conquering Fear

took a while to become adjusted to such disastrous news. Mardai's battle with

cancer was a long and terrible one. Although she fought bravely, she could

not prevail, and I lost the light of my life one beautiful, bright, summer's day.

We had been married for twenty years, and I had no idea how I would

continue in life without her.

As I stood there that July day holding my two children close to me, the

emptiness within me was so horrible that all I could think of was the biblical

reference to "Is there no balm in Gilead? "

"Fear" is a strange beast. In some ways, it serves as our protector,

preventing us from leaping over tall buildings or jumping in front of speeding

cars. In other ways, it shakes us to the bone and brings us to a point where

all we can do is tremble and cry and cringe in the corner. Yet, "Fear" has

much more in common with "Hope" than we might want to believe.

Both "Fear" and "Hope" usually are in the same place. They are like two pilots

on the runway, ready for takeoff. However, one pilot is heading north and the

other is flying south. Fear is saying, "This is the end. My life is over. I cannot

go on any longer. I cannot get over the loss of my partner, the loss of my

business and home."

Ever so quietly, ever so tearfully, "Hope" is saying, "This is bad, really bad.

But there is a much better plan for all concerned. One day, we'll see the

wisdom and beauty of the plan." And though a part of me wanted to scream

in pain, another, much wiser part told me that things are not always what

they seem to be. So with "Hope" at my side, "Fear" could not take my entire

being away from me.

In the days that followed, my thoughts would run races between the sublime

and the ridiculous. "Fear" was my constant companion. I was afraid for my

children because they no longer had a mother. I was afraid for myself

because I did not know how I was going to raise two children alone. I was

afraid for my economic well-being. I had become afraid of almost everything.

There were times when I'd look around and perceive life as a meaningless

mess. But there were other times when a quiet voice would whisper in my

heart that life was not as it appeared to be. Life was much more than a short

span on Earth. A lifetime was but a blink in eternity. Slowly, ever so slowly, I

started to understand.

Sometimes while driving to the supermarket, I would look at the empty seat

next to me -- the seat in which she used to sit -- and I would wonder where

she had gone. Everyone knows where the caterpillar goes--it goes into the

butterfly. But who knows where the butterfly goes?

Conquering Fear

So I thought of Mardai as a butterfly of the universe and I would pray that

her journey be a joyous one and that she would find some way of letting me

know she was fine in her new world. When "Fear" attacks, "Hope" is always

ready to defend.

I truly believe that the bonds that exist between those who love deeply are

stronger than death itself. Perhaps, love is the greatest reality in the

universe. And love is more powerful than any fear that besieges us. Hope is

the catalyst - love does the healing. Hope slays fear. Love knows no fear.

Hope is sight; love is insight. Hope heals; love makes whole. Hope is a

storehouse; love is a powerhouse. Hope springs eternal; love is eternity.

Sometimes on a beautiful, cloudless, starry night, I sit on my porch and look

into the woods behind my house. I hear the voices of my loved ones in my

heart and in the very whispering of the wind through the leaves. I look up

into the night-sky and see the second star on the belt of Orion, the Hunter,

and I can see, if I but look more closely, Mardai smiling at me.

As I look and listen in the quietness of my soul, I hear her say, "I have

always loved you, and you will always be my joy, my pride and my prince. I

have known you from Forever, and I will be with you again one day, even as

we used to be together in the life you now live.

"When you are sad, I feel your sorrow, and when you are happy, I rejoice

with you. You must finish the work that you came to Earth to do. Time will

lighten the heaviness in your heart, and then I will be able to communicate

with you more clearly. Do not be afraid.

"I watch over you and our children, and I know how difficult it can get at

times. But you are not alone. There are others here who also watch and help.

Our work on Earth was finished so it was time to move on. We are all

brilliantly alive.

"I visit you sometimes in your dreams. The veil that separates you and your

reality from mine is very, very thin indeed. In your quiet moments, you

sometimes pierce that veil and get a glimpse of our reality. It is gloriously

exciting where we are, and one day, we shall all meet again. You have much

to do before you join us, but know that we will be with you every step of the

way.

"My dearest John, I have always loved you, and I will love you through the

hallways of time into the Fields of Forever. When you are ready to come

here, I will be the first one waiting to greet you. Live life joyously and fully.

And have no fear for love always conquers fear."

Conquering Fear

It has been quite a few years since Mardai has been gone. The children have

grown up and now have their own careers. They remember the days of great

pain, madness and fear, but they also have fond memories of their mother

and her love.

We have learned much. But the greatest lesson we have learned is that hope

is the antidote for fear and that love is the answer to all our problems. I

cannot help but reflect on the words of Saul of Tarsus, "And now abideth

faith, hope and love, these three; but the greatest of these is love."

Conquering Fear

Paul Harris

Fear: My Invisible Companion

I have known fear my entire life. It has been my constant, invisible

companion since I was a child. I grew up in a home with an abusive father,

where being scared was my constant state of mind. From this background, I

developed a belief that the entire world was a scary place.

As an adult, this fear continued to play a part in my life by causing a lack of

belief in myself and my abilities. Since I was a teenager I have been

interested in owning my own business. I feel I am simply not cut out to

be an employee for someone else. Therefore, in my twenties I started

several businesses, all of which failed.

None of them failed because of a problem with the business opportunity.

They failed because of my fear. Even while I was running these

businesses, I felt like I was a fraud and that any moment people would

"discover" me.

After all of these years of living in fear, I have finally come to believe that I

can choose what to make of my fear. I don't believe that anyone can

entirely eliminate fear, but I now certainly believe it can be managed and

even used to our advantage.

Fear thrives in the absence of a stronger emotion. Discovering this became

the means by which I've finally been able to move past my lifelong fears. The

mind abhors a vacuum and in the absence of a dominating emotion or

thought, fear often seeps in and begins to take over. To combat this one

needs to learn to focus their mind and thoughts upon that which they desire

instead of that which they fear. I realize this is not always easy. But if you

have a dream or a goal that is strong enough your desire for that dream can

block your fear from taking over, as long as you concentrate on the dream.

Normally what happens is someone will imagine their dream or goal but will

then become discouraged because they do not know how they will accomplish

it. This discouragement becomes the open door for fear to move in. You must

concentrate on your dream and hold it in your mind even though you do not

yet know how it will be accomplished.

In this way, fear may keep knocking on the door of your mind but can find no

entrance.

It's taken me many long years to come to this realization but I now know

Conquering Fear

Ed Hirsch

Does your heart ever beat so fast and hard that you feel you may die? When

this happens, (and it happens to me) it motivates and forces decisions (and

action).

It may be fear, or it might just be some raw excitement. In either case, it is

not a bad thing.

Moving toward your goals, dreams and highest aspirations requires a

constant confrontation with the truth! The truth is YOUR deepest beliefs and

personal intentions. Whatever it is you think is your purpose in life, my

encouragement is to "do it."

My first "mentor" wrote "DO IT" and that was all ... when I went up after the

seminar to get his signature in the Freedom Planner I purchased from his

T.V. Infomercial.

Walking the walk of a person driven by some unexplainable vision, will

necessitate action which causes you to do things that the "average bear"

does not normally do.

These actions we endeavor, need not be taken on haphazardly. In fact, the

discipline of planning and totally thinking through the intention and the

respective carrying out of it, must be done responsibly. Many "driven" people

have failed miserably in business and life by simply leaving out the leg

work to research the life plan fully.

Make the decision, take the action and carry it out. Get SCARED ... it is a

great indication that you are making progress in the changes necessary to

achieve the intended result.

"No Pain, No Gain", "No Guts, No Glory", "You'll always miss 100% of the

shots you don't take", "No Drilling, No Oil" (I made the last one up ;-)

I am practically scared to death each morning I arise. The "things to be

done" each day require continual prayer to stay consistent and persistent. It

is not a negative state ... it is damn exciting! As each day moves forward,

the fear does NOT decrease.

Fight the good fight and look the fear directly in the eye to continually spook

it out of the mind.

Being scared to death is a sure sign that you are ready to make the next step

toward your chosen success. My encouragement to you is that if this is the

Conquering Fear

case in your life ... "DO IT!!!"

Contributed by Ed Hirsch

#1 REASON stopping your business growth ...

WASTED resources on those who QUIT!

Eliminate the ZERO'S on your Genie report 650-872-1024

"A Networkers RETENTION Dream Come True"

mailto:fourthwave@earthlink.net?SUBJECT=dream1

Conquering Fear

Glen Hopkins

Glen Hopkins, owns Motivational-Messages.com, your Free resource for daily

motivation and inspiration, including quotes, tips, and stories to help you lead

a successful life. To join the Free mailing list, send an e-mail to

mailto:motivationalmessages-subscribe@listbot.com

or visit

http://www.motivational-messages.com/

FEAR – Don't Let it Control You!

Fear. What is it? Can you touch it? Can you hold it? Can you show it to

another person? I can almost hear you from where I am sitting. "No, no, no".

Okay then, so you can't touch it, you can't hold it, and you can't show it to

another person. The question then is, why? Why do we have fear? Fear is

nothing more than an emotion or a feeling that we hold in our mind.

We fear either the emotional or physical pain something may cause. The

problem is, these emotions and feeling affect the way we live our lives. We

fear doing certain things because we think we might fail. This may be due to

past failures we have actually experienced or it may be due to failures we

fear we might experience.

I urge you to remember and live by the following motto.

Fear stands for,

False

Evidence that

Appears

Real

Most of the time what we fear, we have never even experienced! Isn't that

crazy? You see, your mind has a hard time determining whether you've

actually experienced the failure or just imagined it. Either way, you feel the

physiological symptoms of the fear; such as an upset stomach. Often,

because we can imagine some sort of failure, we believe it will come true,

and then we don't even try! And that is what makes a failure; a person who

is afraid to try because they fear the potential of a negative outcome. If you

don't at least try, you can never succeed.

"I have been through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually

happened." - Mark Twain

Conquering Fear

The question now becomes who defines what 'failure' and ‘success' is? You do

right? Either you create the definition yourself or you accept someone else's

definition. Is it true then that some people create more difficult definitions of

success and failure for themselves than others do? You bet it is! Who do you

think leads a more successful live, Alex who defines success as, "everyday

that I wake up and I'm not six feet under, is a great day." Or Jeff, who

defines success as, "I have to be earning at least million dollars a year before

I am successful."

You guessed right again. Alex. You see, Alex has created her own definition

of what success means and that definition is relatively easy to achieve!

Therefore, in her mind, she is successful everyday. Whereas Jeff, as per his

own definition, cannot be successful until he is earning one million dollars a

year. What are the chances that most of the 'Jeff's' in the world feel like

failures on a daily basis because they are not yet earning one million dollars a

year? Now don't get me wrong. I'm not saying that you should not set high

standards and goals for yourself. What I am saying is that you have to be

careful that you 'happily achieve, rather than achieve to be happy'.

The more difficult your definition of success is to attain, the more fear you

will attach to it. Don't let your own definitions limit you. Or even worse, the

definitions of others. Create your own definitions to make it harder to feel like

a failure and easier to feel like a success. That way you will attach less fear to

what you want in life.

What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail? Image what

you can do in your life with that type of belief system. Try thinking of every

'failure' as a success. That is, every time you 'fail' at something, you have

really succeeded because you have learned what does not work.

Therefore, you are closer to succeeding the next time you try. Remember

that the past does not equal the future. Yesterday's failure does not equal

your future outcomes. Just because you may have failed yesterday, or even

five minutes ago, it doesn't mean you are going to fail again. Just learn from

what you did wrong and change your approach. Don't fear the past. The past

is what has taught you how to succeed in the future.

Be fearless!

Conquering Fear

“Take time to deliberate, but when the time for action has

arrived, stop thinking and go in.” — Napoleon Bonaparte

“One man scorned and covered with scars still strove with

his last ounce of courage to reach the unreachable stars;

and the world will be better for this.”

- Miguel de Cervantes

Conquering Fear

Joann Javons

I called my doctor to describe the intense pain in my right shoulder. As usual,

my doctor suggested I come in for an injection or as an alternative, she

would call in a prescription for a strong anti-inflammatory drug.

I opted for the anti-inflammatory even though I knew I wouldn't take it.

What kind of 'alternative' is a prescription drug? And forget those injections.

Last time I was at her office, I got cortisone injections in my knees for the

pain due to arthritis. I really think I'm too young to have arthritis (well, isn't

middle age too young for this stuff?) but there it is.

I'm not the best patient. When they try to take my blood, I shut my eyes,

real tight, and hold my breath. Watching it is something I just can't do.

I don't like drugs. So I decided to check into acupuncture to reduce the pain

in my shoulder. But I don't like needles either.

This was a big decision. I had seen pictures and TV shows with people having

all those needles stuck in them. The idea of needles stuck in me horrified me.

I figured if I closed my eyes at the acupuncturist's office, I could get through

it.

Little did I know I was about to get another lesson in taking a risk.

Guess what I discovered? Those needles are as fine and thin as a strand of

hair! And they don't hurt! If they hit the right spot, you might feel it but it's

not painful.

If someone had told me this sooner, I would have been in that

acupuncturist's office months ago. Why didn't someone tell me?

The answer is simple: I didn't ask. And, continuing to do what you're doing is

more comfortable than spending time, money, and most of all, dealing with

the anxiety of making a change.

Is the point of this story that you shouldn't believe everything you see on TV?

No, although you shouldn't believe everything you see on TV.

Conquering Fear

The point is that fear holds you back from taking action to enhance your life.

Action that can remove pain or discomfort or unhappiness. Fear keeps your

from taking a risk, taking action to reach your dreams. Action requires a

willingness to risk, try something new, let go of the old.

If you don't take risks, you really aren't living to your potential. Life is a

series of risks, of changes, all with opportunities to experience the gifts that

come.

If you don't take risks, you're staying in your comfort zone. Chances are that

you'll stay there until something pushes you out. That's the hard way to

change.

My simple acupuncture experience was not a big risk by external

measurements: all I could lose was money and time. Ahhh, but the fear of

those needles was pretty big, in my head.

Fear keeps you from moving forward. It keeps you stuck exactly where you

are. The question is: do you need some form of pain in your life to push you

out of your comfort zone? I don't think so. Unless you like to wait for pain.

Some people do. They wait for an excruciating level of discomfort, like losing

a job, getting into debt, not having enough money, before they make any

change in their lives. You don't need to be one of them. It's truly a choice.

The only way out is in. In a new job, in a new savings plan, in a new situation

that brings you closer to what you want. That means taking a risk, taking

action. And the truth is, any action is better than no action. No matter what

action you take to make your life better, you will learn something. Something

you can use to get closer to your dreams.

Isn't it worth moving through your fear to get closer to your dreams? Take a

risk today!

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Conquering Fear

Shelley Lowery

Shelley Lowery is the Executive Publisher, Editor-in-Chief and Webmistress of

Web-Source.net.

http://www.web-source.net

Web-Source.net is a complete resource portal for the Internet Entrepreneur.

The site assists the entrepreneur in developing a serious Web presence by

providing a wealth of free information, resources, tools and content.

Shelley is a full-time Internet Marketer, Writer and the author of several

successful eBooks. Shelley's articles have appeared in hundreds of electronic

and print publications including Microsoft Value Added, Internet Magazine,

WebProNews, SiteProNews, Add Me, iBoost, A.I.M., NoBoss Online,

WhatUseek, and others.

Prior to starting my Internet business, I worked in a steel plant operating a

steel rolling mill. I had absolutely no background in business and was

completely computer illiterate.

I was a single mother with four children, so I needed the type of income that

this dangerous, blue-collar position provided.

Most of the time, I had to work six and seven days a week just to make ends

meet. And, swinging different shifts each month really took its toll.

Sometimes it seemed as if I didn't know whether I was coming or going -- I

hated every single minute I worked in that plant. But at the time, I felt I

didn't have a choice.

I was completely dependent on the regular income this job provided.

Although I sincerely wanted my own business and desperately wanted to

leave my job, I just couldn't -- or so I thought. The truth is...fear was my

biggest obstacle. I was afraid to make a change. Afraid I wouldn't have

enough money to feed my children and pay my bills.

As fate would have it, while loading a 3,000 LB coil of steel onto my machine,

the brake on the crane malfunctioned. The coil struck me in the shoulder and

dislocated it backwards. After two surgeries, and months of rehabilitation, the

doctors determined that my shoulder was beyond repair.

I was off work for over a year, lost my house, my car and then the doctors

informed me that I couldn't go back to my job. My biggest fears of what

'might' happen were now reality. That's when my life dramatically changed. I

was determined that I wasn't going to allow this injury to rule my life.

Although the doctors said that I would never have a functional shoulder, I

Conquering Fear

just couldn't accept that. It was a long and difficult process, but little by little

I regained the use of my shoulder. I took a temporary job cleaning houses

and scraped enough money together to buy my first computer. I knew I

wanted to start my own Internet business, but I was totally clueless as to

where to begin.

I began researching and reading everything I could get my hands on. I

ordered moneymaking opportunities off the Internet, TV and from magazines

-- not to actually pursue the opportunity, but to learn from these marketers.

The more I learned, the more excited I became. I was determined that no

matter what my family and friends said ("you'll never make it on the

Internet" or "Get a 'real' job") I was going to be successful.

Sure, it was a long and difficult road, and I made a lot of sacrifices along the

way. However, all of the hard work is finally paying off.

What I now realize is that the first steps were the most difficult. With each

step I took, the easier it became. I certainly wasn't an overnight success --

far from it. I struggled from the very beginning.

When I started my Internet business there wasn't a lot of information

available to assist me. However, with each small accomplishment, the light at

the end of the tunnel became a little bit brighter. And, gave me the strength

and courage to continue.

I am now a full-time Internet marketer and operate my Internet business out

of the comfort of my own home. The light is now shinning brightly -- It's a

great life:)

Conquering Fear

“He never knew when he was whipped ... so he never was.”

— Louis L’Amour

“Whatever course you decide upon, there is always someone

to tell you that you are wrong. There are always difficulties

arising which tempt you to believe that your critics are right.

To map out a course of action and follow it to an end

requires ... Courage.” - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Conquering Fear

Bob Mcelwain

I have been marketing and consulting on the Web since 1993. My goal with

http://www.SiteTipsAndTricks.Com

is to create a resource center for

wannabe and newbie webmasters in which you can easily find what you

need, else ask me to do so. Further, I can help you build a successful site or

improve one you already have. And I can help you promote your site

effectively. All at prices you can afford. For details, please click the Support

link to the left or send any email to

mailto:support@sitetipsandtricks.com

CHERISH FEAR

Many argue it's best to overcome fears, to put them in their place, so to

speak. For me, that place is right out front where I can meet them head on.

Embrace them even.

It's fear that keeps us from coming too close to the edge of a precipice or

climbing too high in a tree. In business, it points out the pitfalls ahead and

allows us to plan a way to avoid them.

Fear is of two kinds. Rational and irrational. It is rational (sensible) to avoid

falling off a cliff. It is irrational (nonsense) to believe all the people in the

crowded room are watching you. Expecting you to do something naughty,

maybe.

To the degree possible, crush irrational fear. Meet it head on. Why do you

feel everyone is watching you? Look about at those around you. Study their

faces. Their smiles and frowns. Their earnest or frivolous dialog. Listen to

their chuckles and laughter. Are they really watching you? Do they even

know you are in the room? Would anyone notice if you did do whatever? The

answer is no. But cling to such questions until irrational fears are laid aside.

They block our way, slow our pace, and add uncertainties, none of which is

helpful.

But rational fear is useful. Harness it, then give it free rein. Listen to what it

tells you. Evaluate. Are you too close to the edge of the cliff? Back away. If it

is only of goblins in the night it speaks, say the words right out loud, "Stuff

and nonsense!"

Building a business online or offline is fraught with fear. Listen to what it

says. Lean closer if the voice is too faint. It will help you foresee a great deal

of the future, of problems that may beset you, and barriers that may need to

be overcome. It is unlikely all of this will come to pass, but think of the added

confidence gained in being prepared for those that do.

Conquering Fear

Taking risks is an essential ingredient in growing a business. From making

changes in a website to expanding into another area, all is laden with risk.

But if no action is taken, there will be no growth. Instead, the business will

wither and die. Let your fears assist you in planning a clear path around

possible obstacles, then move forward boldly. With good plans for the

unexpected, you can not be seriously harmed.

Specific to your website, recognize that your visitors are real live people, not

just hits reported to log files. As such, they are also subject to fears. Know

some have not made the distinction between rational and irrational fear; they

have both kinds lumped together. Their behavior will be all the more

unpredictable.

Some have reported as many as 65% of visitors fail to complete order forms.

While I have never seen mention of it, I would bet good bucks that many

click away in fear. "Why do they want my address; I didn't ask them to mail

anything to me?" "Why do they want my phone number?" "Who are these

people butting into my life this way?"

We know how important it is to build trust with the content and presentation

of a website. While we may have failed to achieve this goal completely, we

have worked at getting close. I suggest another step be taken.

Since indecision and uncertainty often lead to fear, and thus to flight, erase

all possible points at which a visitor may stumble. Easy navigation is clearly a

must. But look for less obvious things. A link that misleads. An ad that may

offend. A line in a sales pitch that is too much to swallow. That is, look at

every element within your site. Identify every point at which a visitor might

stumble, then make sure it won't happen.

Watch the birds in your backyard. Or the deer in the foothills. Fear keeps

them alive. Given any challenge that can not be instantly identified, it is

always fight or flight. These options are far too fundamental and primeval to

ignore. In your business, harness fears so the next action can be taken. On

your website, be sure visitors do not click off from fears of which they may

not even be aware.

Conquering Fear

Jo McNamara

Jo McNamara lives in Orlando, FL, with 8 cats and 1 husband. Jo wishes to

express her gratitude to Dale Armin Miller. "The success I've earned today is

because of the Internet Marketing Success Arsenal. The success I achieve

tomorrow will be because of the Internet Marketing Success Arsenal."

mailto:what_works_online1@sendfree.com

"The Wish-Idas"

"Knowledge of what is possible is the beginning of happiness." George

Santayana

If someone had told me in my 20s I would attempt to start my own home

business at 50, I would have thought they had taken some really good (bad?)

drugs. If someone had told me in my 30s I would write articles that would be

read by hundreds of people, I would have asked them how long they had

been hearing voices. If someone had told me in my 40s I would have a

business that involved using a computer, I would have laughed so hard I

would need to excuse myself to change my underwear.

Well, here I am...50 years old. I have started my own home business; I have

written articles that have been read by hundreds of people (Okay...I KNOW

my husband, best friend and mother-in-law have read them); and my home

business involves the computer.

I say this with absolutely no conceit. I say this with wonder and amazement.

This actually is ME living this life. I've dreamed of owning my own business

for years; I've dreamed of writing and being published for years. I'm STILL

dreaming of learning how to stop crashing the computer.

I don't regret not doing any of this at a younger age. I fully appreciate what

is happening to me more at the age of 50 because I know what a struggle it

has been. I'm more humble about my "success" because I have an attitude of

gratitude. I look at what I've accomplished with the astonishment of a 3-

year-old.

When I turned 50, I realized that the road before me was shorter than the

road behind me. There was something about turning 50 that made me come

to the realization that I didn't have as much time to do the things I've always

wanted to do.

I've had dreadful visions of being 80, sitting in a rocking chair on a front

Conquering Fear

porch, reflecting back upon all the "Wish-Idas." "Wish I'd done this; wish I'd

done that." At 50, my fear of the"Wish-Idas" became stronger than my Fear

of Failure, my Fear of Humiliation and my Fear of Being Technically Inept.

These are not things you think about in your 20s or 30s. That is the time in

your life when you tend to feel that your future is spread out in front of you.

It's as though you are standing on a spot on the East Coast and you see

clearly in front of you the road that leads to the West Coast. At 50, you are

somewhere in Kansas (close to the Colorado border) and now the road in

front of you doesn't seem so long.

In your 20s and 30s, you have the luxury of saying, "I can always do that

later." At 50, your "laters" are NOW.

This is not meant to be a depressing article on getting older. Turning 50 was

not depressing for me. Turning 50 revitalized me. It gave me the confidence

to feel I could tackle those things I've always wanted to do. If I didn't

succeed at something the first time and I sincerely wanted it, I would keep

trying and keep trying. If it wasn't meant to be, so be it; at least I gave it

100%.

The point of this article is this: Try ANYTHING that you sincerely and

passionately want to do. You have nothing to lose. Feel that you're too old?

How old is "too old?" "Too old" is any age YOU decide it is. If you decide

there is no such age, then the world will stand aside to let you pass.

I am slowly shortening my list of "Wish-Idas." More and more I'm thinking

when I look back on my life, I'll be saying, "I've had a full life following my

passions. Successes and failures, but at least I tried."

Never place limits on yourself. Don't let it be YOU sitting in a rocking chair on

a front porch, regretting the "Wish-Idas."

"Do not aspire to immortality, but exhaust the limits of the possible." Pindar

Conquering Fear

Ante Miljak

Thin air and the occasional wisp of water vapor from the majestic Victoria

Falls fills the 111-meter gap that separates the swirling waters of the

Zambezi and the steel-girded bridge spanning the river.

A similarly tenuous and invisible medium, vision and determination, bridges

the gap separating the average Internet business from a $100 000 income.

A pedestrian crossing the bridge connecting Zimbabwe and Zambia would

hardly notice the slight protrusion on its edge, if it weren't for the feverish

crowd that perpetually mobs the narrow platform. They congregate here for

the thrill of watching those foolish, or brave - always matter of opinion - that

plummet into the abyss with a rope tied around their ankles.

The Webmaster who finds a way to attract an equally feverish crowd to their

website, will see money flow into the bank like the gushing waters of the

Zambezi below the bridge.

But to create a thrill you have to jump!!!

Standing at the edge of the narrow platform I was preparing to do just

that...jump. But the anticipatory thrill of the dive was being overwhelmed by

the intense sensation of fear as the moment drew near.

While the jumpmaster was adjusting the rope around my ankles, I stared at

the wild waters below...and thought.

'What if the rope snaps?'

Perched at the edge of the abyss with an inch thick rope - or a sensible

decision - separating me from eternity, wasn't exactly the appropriate

moment to think of the consequences.

"Will I ever learn?"

I did the same with the Internet. Lured by promises of overnight riches by

marketing "gurus", I jumped headlong into Internet business. It cost me a lot

of pain, heartache, disappointment and money. It came close to costing me

everything that I had worked for my entire life.

"Well, I survived that one."

Conquering Fear

That thought comforted me a little and shifted my mind into a more

philosophical mode.

"What drives a human to do this crazy thing risking death or injury for an act

that serves no purpose, or to leave a perfectly good business to plunge into

the hazy world of the Internet?"

"Should I turn back?"

Hundreds of spectators lined the rails of the bridge and the fringes of my life.

The embarrassment would be too great.

The jumpmaster stopped fiddling with the rope and stood up.

"Ready?" He asked.

"Ready." I replied. My voice shook a little.

He extended his arm towards the horizon - that's where I was supposed to

look - and started counting.

10...9...8. The crowd counted with him. I had about seven seconds to change

my mind. Remnants of the thrill were snuffed out of my mind by relentless

fear.

3...2...1...bungyyyyyyy. The roar of the crowd was frenzied.

I leaped. The acceleration of my falling body astounded me. Instinctively, I

extended my hands in front of me to brake the fall. An irrational and futile

gesture.

The surging waters of Zambezi were meters from my head when the

elasticity of the rope catapulted me back towards the bridge.

Hidden somewhere in the pages of a capacious dictionary, there is probably a

word describing a sensation of intense fear and immense exhilaration. If

there is, I certainly missed it. But that's what I felt.

I did it.

I had no problem finding a word to accurately describe my next feeling.

"Triumph" described it very, very accurately.

Now I had the answer to the questions that tormented my mind while

perched at the edge of the abyss. Now I knew why I had to jump and why I

Conquering Fear

had to take the uncharted Internet road.

In both cases I needed to reaffirm myself. I have reached a point in my life

known to the unenlightened as "middle age." And I am not talking history

here. I am talking about the age at which society casts people into a narrow

groove of outdated perceptions.

That is why I had to test the edges of my courage and the edges of

technology. That's why I needed to jump both ways. I was jumping out of the

straight-jacket that a narrow-minded society tries to pull over my mind. Now

I control the time. It can no longer pass me by.

The road to freedom and independence is now open. There might be some

rocky stretches ahead. In fact I am sure there will. But the worst is behind

me and I now have the ultimate weapon to overcome any obstacle ahead - a

reaffirmed belief in myself.

I now thank those Internet "gurus" that lured me into business by false

promises. To earn a few dollars they nearly ruined my life and if I had not

persevered, they would have. They would have unmercifully killed in me the

most potent force in any person's life - confidence and belief in themselves.

On reflection I realized that they didn't con me into Internet business. To any

sensible individual it is obvious that what they promise is too good to be true.

They just told me what I wanted to hear and I believed it because I wanted

to believe. I yearned to fulfill the deep-seated human need of freedom, self-

affirmation and total independence.

The Internet offers this, if you do it right. And this is not hype.

When you bungy jump, your chances of surviving are greatly increased if the

rope around to your ankles is chosen and tied by responsible professionals.

You have to do some research. Your life is at stake.

In Internet business you have to choose products that are not as ephemeral

as the mist that floats above the Victoria Falls gorge. You have to do some

research. Your life is at stake.

There is no formula for success. Whoever tries to sell it to you is trying to

cheat you out of your money. You are a unique individual. There are

principles that we all use in our unique ways. If you apply them to your

visions and persevere, you will succeed.

It is your vision that liberates the powerful forces that lie within you. It is just

as awesome as the mist exploding off the mighty falls of Mosi oa Tunya - The

Conquering Fear

Smoke that Thunders.

Ante Miljak

mailto:ante@clickandgrowrich.biz

Author of Click & Grow Rich, the business that integrates products, traffic-

generation programs and marketing strategy. All you need to do is Click &

Grow Rich.

http://www.clickandgrowrich.biz

Conquering Fear

Paul Polanco

MY FEAR OF THE STOCK MARKET

I was working for one of the largest no-load mutual fund companies called

T.Rowe Price & Associates in the heart of downtown Los Angeles back in 1995

when it happened. I had helped our clients with their mutual fund

investments, their IRA

(Individual Retirement Account) questions, and stock questions. I soon

realized that many of our "wealthy" clients were asking me for advice (which

I couldn't give since they are a no-load fund family). Here I was a 25 year

old young man, fresh out of college, with very little investment knowledge

being asked to help millionaires with their portfolios!

It was completely absurd. Then it occurred to me: "If these people can

make a lot of money, why can't I?" I realized that these people weren't any

smarter than me, but they were doing things differently than me. I needed

to find out what those "things" were.

I had always been interested in the stock market but was scared to death of

it.

After all, I had lost my entire savings in the stock market when I was 19 (all

$500 of it). I asked my father for advice, but all he could say was "it's all in

real estate, stay away from the stock market." Then I began asking friends

and co-workers for advice. They either said it was "too risky" or that "you

don't know what you're doing."

I became very frustrated.

I wanted to make money in the stock market but by the time I had finished

talking to my "circle of friends", I was scared silly. My fear of losing my

money was great.

It kept me up late at night. "What if you lose your savings again?" my brain

would ask. After much thought, I decided that if other people can do this so

can I. My desire to beat the odds was even greater than my fear. I almost

gave it up, but I decided to set my own path.

Once I truly decided, I began reading voraciously. I read as many books

about stock investing that I could get my hands on. I went to seminars,

listened to tapes, and began seeking out mentors. People who were actually

making money in the stock market, not journalists who just write about it.

Conquering Fear

When I felt that I was ready, I began paper-trading. This is when you buy

and sell stocks on paper and not using real money. I did this for about 6

months. I kept track of all my fictitious trades. The first few weeks were

brutal. I lost a lot of phony money. Yet, with each loss I began learning

what I did wrong (sometimes it was just dumb luck too since no one can

predict the future). Then I began showing small profits. I had learned of a

way of "insuring" my investments and keeping my losses to a bare minimum.

I reinvested those profits for bigger gains. I became so good at it that I

began using real money. Then I discovered that I could make money no

matter if the market went up or down!

My friends noticed a profound change in me. I began speaking differently,

using words such as "relative strength","covered calls", "put options", "going

short", "new highs", and "moving averages".

Even though everyone told me it was impossible for me to make money in

the stock market, I managed to not only prove them wrong, but 7 years

later, I'm still proving them wrong! What's even more bizarre is they STILL

think the stock market is "too risky" and that I am "lucky". Closed-minded

people never become wealthy.

This fascination with the stock market led me into different careers such as

insurance, financial planning, internet marketing, and estate planning.

Today, one of my passions is to help people with their financial planning

needs from a different point of view (I've been on both sides of that desk!)

and to protect them from 99% of all the garbage and nonsense that is out

there.

Despite my very real fear of losing my savings, I decided to simply face my

fear, find people who were making CONSISTENT gains in the market, took

the BEST of what they had to offer, and created my own system. Face your

fears and they will either lessen or completely disappear. Thank you.

Paul Polanco

Financial Strategist

mailto:peabs99@earthlink.com

Conquering Fear

Jenny Richter

http://www.clubmidas.net/cgi-bin/refer.cgi?38609

http://helpyouto.buildreferrals.com

mailto: jenny_richter@hotmail.com

Overcoming Fear

I was a shy kid. An introvert. An observer of life rather than a participant. I

was one the last ones to put my hand up in the classroom. I would break into

a sweat and feel my heart thumping just thinking about putting my hand up.

If the teacher asked me a question in front of the class, my face would burn

red and eventually I’d stutter an answer. I had trouble asking the kids in the

playground if I could join their game. I couldn’t start up a conversation.

Today, the thought of public speaking or public appearances no longer strikes

terror in my veins. I have given speeches at weddings - but I’m not a master

of ceremonies. I have been the whip on debating teams - but I’m not a

debater. I have been in a sold out play at Town Hall - but I’m not a thespian.

I have given a solo performance, a soliloquy to a packed audience in a capital

city -but I’m not a performer. I have taught subjects to students - but I am

not a teacher. I’ve given lectures at University - but I’m not a lecturer. I have

modeled clothes in halls full of people - but I’m not a model. I’ve been on

national television - but I’m not an entertainer. I’ve sung in front of groups of

people - but I’m not a singer. I have broadcast radio sessions - but I am not

a host. I’ve played keyboards in a band on stage - but I’m not a musician.

I overcame the fear by applying a credo. “Just do it and damn the

consequences”.

It wasn’t easy at first. If my mother hadn’t strongly encouraged me I doubt I

would have done any of the above. She was my super salesman. She would

counter argue all of my objections for not doing it. “I’m not good looking

enough, I’m not smart enough, I can’t act, I can’t talk, I don’t know anything

about it, ‘I haven’t done it before’, ‘They’ll laugh at me’ and so on and on.

She left me with no more ‘reasons’ not to try. So I did. I signed up for a play

at school. And that’s when something great happened. I didn’t die of

embarrassment from doing a public appearance. Not during and not after.

After that I got a buzz from self achievement. I did it! It became easier and

easier after that.

I had learnt a lesson. My fear had stopped me from doing things. Fear had

cloaked itself in the “I can’t”, “I don’t”, “I haven’t” and “I’m not” thoughts.

Conquering Fear

Conquering my fear had opened the doors to achievement. I conquered my

fear by saying I can, I do, I have and I am. The next step was to believe it,

prove it by doing it and finally, repeat the process until comfortable.

I have applied this strategy to other areas of my life when I was fearful of

something. Here are some examples.

I am a traveler - I have visited over 25 countries on 4 continents. I

conquered my fear of being away from familiar surroundings, fear of the

unknown and other cultures.

I am an explorer - I have circumnavigated Australia twice in a campervan,

covering a combined distance of over 50,000+ KM. I conquered fears of

getting lost, wild animals, dying in the dessert, isolation and heights (I

climbed Ayers Rock).

I am a sailor - I have traveled on ocean liners, yachts, ferries and boats. I

conquered my fear of being way out in the middle of the ocean.

I am a diver - I have a PADI open water diver certification. I conquered my

fear of breathing in deep water.

I am a sportsperson - I have played a range of different sports. I conquered

the fear of injuring myself.

I am a parent - I have 2 children. I conquered the fear of childbirth.

I am a University graduate - I have a Bachelor Degree in Commerce. I

topped my major. I conquered my fear of academic failure.

I am a restaurateur - I have owned and operated my own restaurant. I

conquered my fear of running my own business.

I am an investor - I have investment property. I conquered my fear of

financial loss.

I am a home owner - I have conquered my fear of debt.

I am a writer - I have had a few pieces published in national magazines. I

have conquered the fear of revealing my personal self to a large audience.

I am bi-lingual - I speak, read and write German. I conquered a fear of

speaking differently.

I am transient - I have moved house 14 times and have lived overseas. I

Conquering Fear

Darren Roberts

So many people don't enjoy the life they would prefer to experience. As a

result, they live it party fulfilled. Why do they sell themselves short? Why are

personal desires and aspirations not important to

the vast majority?

After years of business in Great Britain, Australia & Germany, Darren decided

that he would do what I could to improve the lifestyle of many by assisting

them lead a higher level of living with greater satisfaction, contentment and

pleasure.

Since early 1998, he has devoted his time to this through his Website, Ezine

& Online Membership Area. He has written countless reports and articles

covering this topic. His most successful book, "Making Your Success

Inevitable" reflects this.

It involves more than just motivating the individual. It's about the individual

becoming 100% honest with themselves to pursue what they ultimately want

rather than to follow the masses. This is what makes people really happy and

it is Darren's goal to do what he can to help others reach this happy state of

living.

Check out the abundance of original resources he has at:

http://topliving.com

Conquering Fear

"YOUR PERSONAL GOAL. OVERCOMING FEAR!"

Written By: Darren Roberts

Overcoming acrophobia and deciding to do a parachute jump. This is a

colossal undertaking - not only would you be attempting something, which

some people have not survived, but you would be facing one of your largest

fears: heights. You could have chosen something easier such as bungee

jumping, learning to fly and parasailing but you've gone straight to the top.

How do you prepare for this? How do you bring yourself to the best possible

vantage point before you actually plummet to the ground? One thing is for

sure; it isn't going to happen if the thought makes you giddy and weak at the

knees. Therefore, the first step is to face your fear head on and create a

visual!

What better way is there than doing the respective training course? Earlier, in

Chapter II we covered in detail the value of visualization. We all know the

expression "put me in the picture" meaning "show me what's going on"!

Visualizing is tremendous for this. Now, if you spend the next three days at

the training course for your 10,000' free fall jump, then you are learning

what to expect when you're in the air.

Many of our fears are simply fears of the unknown. In fact, the unknown has

a lot to answer for. The best way to overcome this is to make the unknown

your own knowledge. Learn about the unknown and your whole attitude will

change. Put yourself in the picture. Get others to assist you by asking

anything and everything remotely related to your jump. This will be met with

interest, as it's obvious that you're keen on skydiving.

So, as you learn disaster recovery, the correct way to free fall, how to read

your altimeter, balance your center of gravity, directional control and your

descent in general, a lot of your fears will be addressed. Perhaps not all of

them, but a higher percentage will no longer be as problematic as they

perhaps were. This is a huge step in the right direction, which will go a long

way to making your jump easier. A lot of your fears will simply transform into

adrenalin. You will run through countless drills in advance.

Picture yourself on the airplane strut and letting yourself fall into the

atmosphere. Visualize the earth growing before you as you fall at 120 miles

(200 km)/hour. Examine all of your safety checks as you fall through the sky

in your mind. It's very important that you imagine it all. After you've done it

a few times, you may want to incorporate some potential catastrophes to see

how well you do. If you panic then practice some more.

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If you are someone who would never do a parachute jump under any

circumstances, then equate this to an example of your own using something

that you might consider doing to overcome your fears. Make sure you use an

example where genuine fear is involved, perhaps arachnophobia or

claustrophobia.

Now that you've trained for three days, it is almost time to take the plunge.

However, as it gets closer you doubt your capabilities. Your self-confidence

has immediately plummeted. All of a sudden in one foul swoop, everything

from the last three days has now amounted to naught - although a thought

ago it was sky high.

What else can you do to prepare yourself for the jump? Remember, this is all

a part of starting from the best vantage point. We must be in the most

prepared state before we hurl ourselves out of a little airplane 2 miles in the

sky. We have product knowledge. How would you feel if you pulled out at the

last minute! Your goal would not have been achieved. Pulling out is not an

option, so do what you need to do to make this goal achievable.

The airplane takes off. You're inside, dressed up in your gear with a backpack

strapped tightly to your back, which will shortly become your life-support

system. This is a telling time. You know the next time you touch terra firma

you won't be in this machine. This is a decisive moment.

This is reality.

The climb to 10,000' seems to take an eternity (it's a slow climb anyway but

nerves intensify the time factor). Every second feels like an hour. Every

thousand feet the temperature drops 2ºC but you still sweat profusely. The

butterflies in your stomach are running riot. You really are doing this!

The door on the plane has been removed to avail an easier exit. Ever so

slowly, the Cessna 172 gets to the imminent point of (almost) no return.

Your preparation has brought you this close. It is your mindset, your outlook,

your confidence, your desire, your goal and your will. Your deep seeded

desire to attack your phobia has brought about an immense plan, which you

have worked through to get to this point. You're now at the best possible

starting point. You're mentally and physical prepared for the experience of

your life. You're about to make your goal a reality.

In many cases, this one included, the preparation itself is as much joy as the

final undertaking. Well, let's see...

You climb out and stand on the struts of the plane. Quite simple really, the

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door's missing. The cold sweat on your hands disappears almost instantly, as

you muster enough energy to push yourself from the aircraft. Remarkably -

just as in practice you fall away from the airplane. The engine noise is

replaced by wind. Man! Tons of wind, it's blowing a gale.

The excitement of accelerating up to 120mph towards this landmass

becoming ever so bigger is an added bonus. You hadn't prepared for that. All

fear is gone; replaced by exhilaration and amazement. You even get to drop

through a cloud or two, which you only notice by color. As soon as you see it

- it's behind you.

It's only a 45 second fall. The experience of this magical moment is

something you'll never forget. Its importance in overcoming your phobia can

never ever be sold short. You pull the ripcord understanding it will stop you

meeting the ground more quickly than you would like. Although you have a

spare (emergency parachute) in the trunk, you don't expect to use it, but

preparation showed you how to do so if the situation ever arises.

Now, you are in for a huge treat. You need to guide yourself through the last

4,000' to the little "X", which is marked on the field to which you're heading.

There is a fully trained parachutist down below giving you instructions by sign

how to hit your target. You're in the bush - only a house or two can be seen

for miles. It is so still! There is no noise. Absolutely none. What a priceless

bonus. You're in your own world. Your vision is enhanced. You can see for

miles. There are cars on distant roads, birds circling below and afar, power

pylons as far as the eye can see, crops in progress, cattle grazing at their

leisure, and yes, kangaroos bounding in the distance.

Slowly but surely, the small "X" on the ground gets larger and larger.

Occasionally the wind blows through your parachute breaking the silence. A

few moments later, you impact on the turf and roll over a couple of times as

you did in training; subsequently you're not hurt.

You stand up and break the silence again with a huge scream - a scream

partially relief related that you're once again on the ground, but primarily

because you have done it. You have done it by facing your fear and

triumphed. Your inner fear has now been addressed and transposed to an

asset. Congratulations.

Ideas for success,

Darren

Written By: Darren Roberts

Subscribe to the popular "Success and Self-Motivation" Weekly publication,

Conquering Fear

Lynne Schlumpf

Being a dreamer for all the wrong reasons (or wrong outcomes)

We as human beings like to do the old "duck and cover". Read on, and see if

you don't see some of yourself in this article.

I'll relay a story that may help illustrate. Years ago, (yes, still trying to

remind myself years ago WAS Years Ago!) I worked for a computer

consulting firm that had just about the whole city in its back pocket. Its

owners were geniuses at generating business. They could've been

millionaires. However, they let greed get the best of them and began

laundering money out of the company and sinking the profits into new cars,

new houses, and bank accounts. They forgot one really important business

rule - sink some of the profits into generating more business and into staying

"cutting edge".

One day, we all went to work on a Friday, and there was a note on the door

that we needed to get our stuff and leave. No paycheck. No explanation.

I loved that job too much, and that experience nearly destroyed me with fear

for years. I did find another job pretty quickly, but it took years to trust

anyone again.

Do you do this? Here's what I did - I let my fear rule my life for years after

that. I'm just now letting the positive part of that experience teach its

lessons. I was literally creatively paralyzed. I had trouble trusting bosses

and coworkers. I thought a firing or layoff were always biting at my heels.

This was eating me alive, even though my work as a Microsoft SQL Server

database administrator was in high demand.

A couple of companies I worked for after that did go out of business too,

making things even scarier. The thought of not being able to feed my

daughter was terrifying, to say the least. Those experiences taught me

several things I would like to share with you.

Don't get yourself into debt, if at all possible. It cripples your creativity,

lowers your self-esteem, and it often keeps people from taking risks to go

into their own business. It keeps you always "working for the man" (someone

else). You don't feel like you control your life. A banker somewhere does.

Don't assume you always know the outcome of every situation. You can

positively influence the outcome, but fear often negatively influences it. Plan

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for the positive. Tell yourself daily that the outcome will be positive.

Don't assume you know what bosses/customers/coworkers are thinking. Ask

them. (and hope they're honest with you)

Try not to backstab, even if others do it to you. Especially don't backstab

your business partner, boss, or anyone else in your company that has the

power to make or break your livelihood. It destroys your company, whether

its your own company or someone else's

Relax everyday. Take 15-30 minutes of peace in your favorite place. It could

be your favorite comfy chair, your swimming pool, (in my case, it's my front

porch where I can watch the birds). Dream of great things there. Make it a

rule you must follow that only positive dreaming is allowed in that place and

time. Dream just like you did when you were a kid, but focus your dreams

towards those things you have always wanted. What is it that wakes you up

in the middle of the night sometimes? What nags at you to do. Dream it and

you can be it. This time to yourself will turn your fear and negatives into

positives and courage.

Once you master these concepts, fear in your life will only be useful when it

should be. Fear is a tool to be used only for warning you of potential "dumb

moves" you might be getting ready to make.

Success and peace to you!

Lynne Schlumpf

Author of the upcoming book "The Little Website That Could" at:

http://www.littlewebsitethatcould.net/

You can write to Lynne at

mailto:lynne@r66cci.com

Conquering Fear

“Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glorious

triumphs, even though checkered by failure, than to take

rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor

suffer much, because they live in the grey twilight that

knows not victory nor defeat.” - Theodore Roosevelt

Conquering Fear

Yanik Silver

Just 28-years old, Yanik Silver is recognized as the leading expert on creating

automatic, moneymaking web sites…and he’s only been online full time since

February 2000! He believes almost everything people have been taught

about making money online is completely wrong. His Internet success

techniques only require a simple web site and you don’t even need to know

how to put up your own web page. (In fact, Yanik still doesn’t know HTML).

He is the author and publisher of several best-selling marketing books and

tools including:

http://www.InstantSalesLetters.com

http://www.InstantInternetProfits.com

http://www.MillionDollarEmails.com

http://www.AutoresponderMagic.com

http://www.33daystoonlineprofits.com

Yanik specializes in creating powerful systems and resources for

entrepreneurs to enhance their businesses.

My Father owns a Medical Equipment Sales and Services Company. A family

business. I worked for him on and off since I was about twelve years of age.

Sort of doing odd jobs here and there. Then I was in charge of advertising

and

when I was fourteen he had me doing some tele-marketing, making calls to

Dentists.

When I was sixteen and got my drivers license, my Dad sent me out to make

"cold" calls on Doctors. That was a pretty interesting time.

The reason I bring that up is because it was at this time that I really felt

fearful the most. I wanted to start doing things on my own and eventually

leave the company. My fear was in telling my Father that I wanted to do

something different and not carry on his business.

This was back in 1999 and it was a real struggle. I remember talking to my

fiancé at the time (my wife now) about this for quite some time. Talking

about how to tell him without getting him really upset. How to just do it.

I knew in my heart of hearts that I didn't want to continue selling medical

equipment. I had other things that I wanted to pursue.

At that time I had my first information marketing project which was selling a

manual to cosmetic surgeons. That was going pretty well at the time. What

made it easier for me was that I took it in smaller steps. It was kind of a

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gradual progression and I was lucky because I worked for my Dad which

allowed me to do it this way. He let me use my cell phone to take incoming

calls for that business.

It was kind of funny. I'd be at my desk and my cell phone would ring. I'd

answer, Silver Trade Group, can I help you. I'd be sitting in my Dad's

offices explaining to Doctors what they'd be getting in the Kit I was selling

for my company. Dad let me use his fax machine to take incoming orders.

Then I asked him for one day off per week to work on my own project. I

had every Friday off for about two months.

My Father's response to the changes I was making wasn't as bad as

what I had built up in my head. I definitely think that's something we all do.

We over play what we think is going to happen. The fear I had built up was

the basic fear of the unknown. I didn't know what his reaction was going and

so created this fear of the exchange.

I gradually moved from one day a week to finally, I remember going into my

Dad's office and telling him it was time for me to go. That was an interesting

conversation. He asked me if I was sure and if I really thought I could make

it. I told him that I thought I could and that I'd still be happy to do some

advertising for him. That went on for a couple of months.

There weren't a lot of expenses associated with running my new business

and I didn't have any debt to speak of. I guess I figured that if this doesn't

work out I can always try to get my old job back.

The thing that really pushed me forward was, I knew that if I didn't take this

opportunity, I'd always look back and wonder what might have happened,

what could have been. That was the thing that really motivated me a lot.

I had been afraid that my Dad would really blow up at me and tell me how

dumb I was to give up the great opportunity of taking over his business.

I was only twenty five at the time and making a fairly good commission

selling medical equipment. What I had built into this fearful situation didn't

happen.

What I find myself doing now is, when I'm starting something new, I'll think

of what the worst case scenario could be. If I can live with that and in most

cases I know it won't happen anyway, then I just do it.

I find that the longer I put off something that I need to do, the harder it

becomes to do it. For instance, calling someone I don't know that I want

to do a project with or someone I want to interview. The longer I continue to

Conquering Fear

put it off, the larger the fear and uncertainty gets. It takes a hold of me and

affects what I'm thinking instead of just doing it and getting it over with. The

worst thing that could happen is, the person could say no. That's not going to

make me a worse person. I'm not going to be any less successful and before

that point I wasn't working with them anyway.

What I find really works for me is to just take action and you'll see what the

next steps are going to be. Many people want to wait until they know every

step in the process and that's usually not possible.

A good example might be that you're walking in the fog and can only see

about a hundred feet ahead of you. Your destination is still a mile down the

road. When you walk that hundred feet, you'll be able to see the next

hundred feet. You can't see the next hundred feet until you take action and

walk the first hundred. So, take action and just do it.

Conquering Fear

Joe Vitale

Joe Vitale is the world's first Hypnotic Marketer. He is President of Hypnotic

Marketing, Inc., and author of way too many books to list here, including the

new book "Spiritual Marketing," the best-selling e-book "Hypnotic Writing,"

and the best-selling Nightingale-Conant audio program, "The Power of

Outrageous Marketing."

You can still have Joe's proven marketing e-course--- "Recession-Proof

Marketing"---delivered to your e-mail box every day for a week---for FREE---

by sending a blank e-mail to

mailto:class@aweber.com

You can now get Joe's new email marketing course, "Easy Marketing Secrets

for Coaches," free, by sending blank email to

mailto:hypnoticmarketing@getresponse.com

mailto:joe@mrfire.com

http://www.MrFire.com

http://www.HypnoticWriting.com

http://www.AdvancedHypnoticWriting.com

http://www.CreateAdvertisingThatSells.com

http://www.HypnoticWritingSwipeFile.com

NEW! -

http://www.HypnoticMarketing.com

How Overcoming Fear Led to $21,500 in 7 Days by Joe Vitale

I remember two years, sitting right here at my computer, holding my finger

over the "send" key. I was about to send out a sales letter to my then small

database of some 800 people. The letter was going to invite them to sign-up

for a brand new online seminar---an e-mail only class on "Spiritual

Marketing," which I was going to ask them to pay $1,500 per person to

attend.

This was bold. And daring. And maybe even crazy. An e-mail ONLY class?

That meant people would get lessons by e-mail. They would never talk to me

or see me. That was different from most classes, that at least incorporated

telephone consulting.

And this e-class was on "Spiritual Marketing"? The subject alone may ruffle

some feathers. I could be seen as a flake, as a weirdo, as a con.

And $1,500 per person as the price of admission? No one had EVER charged

that much for an e-class before. Most people gave their e-classes away for

free. And here I was, about to ask one thousand and five hundred dollars!!!

Conquering Fear

I was afraid. I feared losing my friends, receiving nasty emails, making a fool

of myself, and regretting the whole idea.

But I also know that risk is part of life. I asked myself if I could live with

losing friends, receiving flames, and looking stupid. I decided I could bear

that cross.

I hit the send key.

What happened?

Instant success! Fifteen people wanted in that first e-class of mine. I ended

up making $21,500 in 7 days. I also created a new form of online coaching

that others are now doing. And I wrote an eBook on how people can teach

their own e-classes for high profit.

In short, I created a whole business from facing my fear!

Fear? You have it. I have it. So does everyone else. The trick is in acting

despite the fear. Always do your best to reduce the fear, but never think

you'll eliminate it. Fear is healthy. It keeps you alert. It feeds you juice you

can use to accomplish great deeds.

On the other side of it is freedom---and sometimes great profit!

(This is from my book "Spiritual Marketing." )

I admit it

I never wanted to publish this book or make it available to a wide audience.

I was scared.

I wrote this book for one person: My sister. Bonnie had three kids, was

unemployed, and was on welfare. It hurt me to see her suffer. I knew her life

could be different if she knew the five step process I developed for creating

whatever she wanted. I wrote this material for her, and only for her, in 1997.

She's now off welfare and doing fine. She's not rich yet, but I think I've

shown her a new way to live life.

I never wanted to make this book public because I was nervous about how

the world would perceive me. I've written ten books so far, for such well

known and conservative organizations as the American Marketing Association

and the American Management Association. I also have an audiotape

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program with Nightingale-Conant. I figured if I told the world about my

interest in spirituality, people would ridicule me, clients would fire me, and

these organizations would shun me. So I played it safe and kept this book a

secret.

But in June, 1999 I felt the inner urge to give a copy of the manuscript to this

book to Bob Proctor, at the beginning of one of his Science of Getting Rich

seminars. Bob read it and loved it. And then he did something shocking.

There were 250 people in that seminar in Denver. Bob stood before them and

read off all of my book titles, and then introduced me to the crowd. I stood

and the crowd applauded. They treated me like a celebrity and I loved the

attention.

But then Bob told everyone about my new book, my unpublished book, about

this book. I was surprised. I wasn't ready for this. I held my breath. And then

Bob told them the title to it: Spiritual Marketing.

There was such a hush throughout the crowd that chills went up my spine.

Not only did people favorably react to the book, but they all wanted it, and

now. At least fifty people came up and said they wanted to buy the book. Bob

Proctor later said he wanted to record it. And one publisher in the seminar

said he wanted to publish the book, sight unseen!

My concerns about publishing this book vanished. I could see that the timing

was right to release these ideas, and I saw that I would be safe in doing so.

So here I am.

As with most things in life, there's little to be afraid of and wealth and glory

await right around the corner.

All you have to do is step forward and do the things you're being nudged

from within to do.

Bob Proctor nudged me in front of 250 people.

And the book “Spiritual Marketing” is the result.

Conquering Fear

Patricia Whaley

Fear lives because we do not understand a situation or circumstance and is

THE one thing that we all need to overcome.

Last year, after 2 years of loyal and enthusiastic trading, I parted ways with a

very well known Internet company, whose business ethics had become, well,

shall we say "suspect" and I no longer wished to be associated with them.

My parting was not only painful, it was very humiliating.

Of course, I knew that this would be the case, and the CEO of the company,

took great glee in trying to ruin not only my reputation, but my self esteem.

(I hope he knows one of the laws of the universe, in that what goes around,

comes around.)

I digress!

Before I made this huge decision to leave, I was filled with dread and a lot of

fear.

Fear of starting over. Fear of "going it alone." Fear of losing friends and

business associates. Fear of going outside of my comfort zone.

Fear of losing all the money I had already made with this company, knowing

that I would never see a penny of it! (Lesson here for all. Read the small

print in your contracts)

In short, I had many a sleepless night worrying about the decision that I

knew I had to make, but make it I did.

Yes, it was scary, like a tornado it eventually passed and things settled down

and I have been able to slowly re-build a new business. Fear only has power

because we give it power!

In short, if I had not severed my association with this particular company,

the FEAR would have triumphed.

Instead, I faced my fear, I listened to my gut instinct, (never lets you down

by the way) and am now on my way to achieving my goals and dreams.

So much for Fear, which by the way stands for:

F ailed

Conquering Fear

Bob Kleine

My own experiences with fear were the initial impetus behind the writing and

compiling of this eBook project.

Since early childhood I've battled my fears, almost daily. Often they would

get the best of me. Many times I saw things I wanted to do, people I wanted

to meet and situations I wanted to be a part of go down in the flames of my

own indecisions and fears.

I was often too afraid to speak, too scared to act; paralyzed into indecision.

I grew up in a home with a domineering father and a mother who never

questioned his authority or his decisions. My Dad was not one who handed

out praise or compliments for a job well done. He had no problem though,

dishing out criticism for anything he perceived as not my best. Since my best

was never good enough; well, you get the picture. A heck of a lot of criticism

and very little positive reinforcement.

Now, don't get me wrong. My parents were not bad people. They raised us

(my older bother and sister and myself) the best way they knew how. Saying

that, I must admit that the strict upbringing and lack of acknowledgement

caused many problems for me as I grew and some that linger with me still.

Growing into manhood, I always had the fear that I wasn't good enough,

smart enough or tough enough. You name it, I wasn't good enough at it.

I felt I lacked the ability to accomplish anything well enough to please

my employers, my friends or my family.

Even though my grades, throughout my school years, were well above

average, my insecurities and fears kept me from applying myself to anything

other than menial occupations after leaving school.

Then something wonderful happened.

I was working for the distribution arm of a major veterinary drug company. I

started there as a delivery driver. A truck driver.

Through a series of events, I ended up managing the night shift in the

warehouse. At the time, the average overtime per employee, per week, had

reached an astounding twenty to thirty hours. These guys were working

almost two weeks worth of hours in a weeks time. Every week.

I had, in a conversation with another of our drivers, mentioned that I thought

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I could cut the overtime down to zero hours per week. Somehow, my

comments got to the general manager and he called me into his office. He

wasn't very happy at the thought of me mouthing off that I could run his

warehouse better than he could. He told me that if I thought I could actually

do what I claimed, then I should go ahead and get it done.

He temporarily assigned me as night shift supervisor. I understood that if

I couldn't accomplish what I claimed, I'd most likely be looking elsewhere

for a job, and soon. I was terrified!

I was faced with a real dilemma. I did believe I could accomplish the task

before me. I'd worked in warehousing and distribution for a number of years

and knew that the methods they were employing were in need of a major

overhaul. The dilemma, of course, was my fear of being inadequate. Not

being good enough.

I slept very little the night before my new assignment began. Thoughts ran

through my mind of the things I was brought up to believe. Not smart

enough. Not good enough. Never do anything well enough.

I managed to get myself to work the next afternoon, but it wasn't easy. I

really liked working for this company and had friends there. The fear of

losing that job and those friends is probably what got me to work and

through that first night.

I'd backed myself into a corner by making the claims I'd made. Now, in order

to stay with the company, I had to back them up with actions.

Well, as it turned out, I did reduce overtime to zero hours per week and

in only three weeks time. I'm not saying that to brag, but in amazement.

For the first time in my life, I'd stood up to my fear and found that I was

good enough. I could perform well enough and I was smart enough.

Within two years I found myself managing this companies second largest

warehouse distribution center. A quarter of a million square foot facility

with forty delivery trucks and annual sales of over thirty million dollars.

I finally faced my fear by using fear itself. I defeated the fears of not

being good enough using the fear of losing job and friends.

I still battle these types of fears today as I'm sure some of you do. When

faced with similar situations, I remember the things I was able to accomplish

when I stood up to my fear and just went ahead and did the task at hand.

Conquering Fear

Throughout this book, many people, from different walks of life, have shared

with you their own particular journeys through the clutches of fear and the

resultant triumph when they burst through to victory.

Numerous fears have been written about here.

Fear of:

Heights

Falling

Death

Pain

Abandonment

Failure

Anger

People

Inadequacy and many more.

Which ones do you own?

Whichever fears are yours, we hope that through the stories you've read in

these pages, you can find the courage to push your way through.

Take that step into the unknown. Make that small leap of faith and reach the

success that is right there waiting for you, on the other side of the chasm.

It can be yours. Don't let the mind killer destroy your hopes and dreams.

Just go ahead and do it.

Bob Kleine is Webmaster and owner of

http://www.opportunityknoxx.com

Bob is author of “One Soul”, a children’s eBook, the novel “God’s Committee”

and the Author, editor and compiler of “The Mind Killer”.

Conquering Fear

The Entrepreneurs Prayer

As I awaken with the gift of yet another day and prepare for the tasks at

hand, I offer up this most ardent prayer:

I pray for continued clarity of purpose so that I may hold my vision steady

and keep my focus on the needs and success of others, which in turn shall

bring me my success.

I pray for the wisdom to expect abundance in my life, that it surrounds me

and is available for the taking and to be shameless and unapologetic upon its

receipt, for I deserve abundance.

I pray for a cheerful countenance, be it clear or cloudy skies and that I may

radiate and infect others with my positive attitude.

I pray for the trust of others that they may recognize my sincerity and true

intentions so that we may move forward together.

I pray for the strength to fend off adversity and use my desire and

determination as both weapon and shield.

I pray for the courage to carry forth my convictions during the battle of

business and to resist temptation to a quicker monetary result when such

temptation compromises these things for which I stand.

I pray that I may be used as a lightning rod to collect the amazing ideas

already present in the universe and when blessed with such inspiration, that I

may be able to apply my talents and abilities to turn the power of thought

into measurable advancement of my goals.

I pray to retain my childhood wonder so that I can recognize and revel in the

small miracles of each day that others may miss.

I pray for an infinite supply of self-confidence for it alone fortifies faith,

strengthens my resolve and conquers the largest enemy I will ever face -

fear.

I pray for a compassionate spirit and the patience to offer those who seek my

advice and my help, my full and undivided attention.

I pray for good health and a feeling of well being, and the continued desire to

improve those areas of my physical life I may be neglecting in the name of

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my spiritual and entrepreneurial advancement.

I pray that today is a day of excellence and at its conclusion I can

acknowledge and be grateful for the forward motion I have made and the

growth I have experienced.

I pray most of all for the understanding and support of those closest to my

heart, my family, that they will equate what may seem like endless hours of

apparent pre-occupation with affairs of business to what is at the very core of

my being, that which drives me, for once I achieve what I have set out in its

fullest, I will become that more complete being I strive to be.

It is for these things that I pray, for I am an entrepreneur.

MY RESOURCE BOX

Rick Beneteau is the author of the best-selling marketing

eBook, The Ezine Marketing Machine at:

http://www.ezinemoney.net

Rick invites you to partner with him in his top rated

affiliate programs at:

http://www.interniche.net

and,

subscribe to his FREE, highly acclaimed Mirror Ezine:

http://www.themirrorezine.com

100

Conquering Fear

The Ice Cream 'Comb' Story

She was three. Just released from a far-away hospital after life threatening

brain surgery, ready to take on the world again. I was happy just to have her

back. My little "Mr. Clean" (shaven head and hoop earrings) and me driving

along to our local mall. Hanging out with dad day. I recall her words as if it

were yesterday.

"Daddy, can I get a treat?"

As she was understandably spoiled (if there is such a thing), I replied "ok

honey, but just ONE".

Her eyes beamed like the Fourth of July in anticipation of that something only

she knew at the time.

We drove around to the new end of the mall on the normal seek-and-destroy

mission of capturing a parking place. After all, it was Saturday. We landed a

fair distance from our destination, and began walking hand-in-hand towards

the entrance, her pace gaining momentum with each tiny step. A few feet

from the doors she broke loose and ran hands-first into the thick wall of

glass, trying with everything she had to swing the big doors open. No luck.

With a little assistance, she 'did it' and tried the very same thing at the

second set of doors.

It was then that I asked her what she wanted for her treat. Without

hesitation, she matter-of-factly said "an ice-cream comb from the ice-cream

store". Ok, the goal was set and we were in the mall!

But hold on! What was this? At the end of what was just an ordinary looking

lane of retail chain outlets she spied something new- this huge fountain,

water shooting who knows how high into the air. The new goal line!

She ran, and I walked (don't ya just hate it when parents let their kids run

wild in public?), and we arrived at the spectacle at about the same time. The

turbulent noise was almost deafening.

"Daddy, can I make a wish, can I make a wish?" she screamed as she

jumped with the kind of pure joy we've all long since forgotten.

"Sure honey, but that will be YOUR TREAT you know" I explained (gotta be

firm with these kind of things).

She agreed.

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I fumbled around in my pocket and pulled out what I think was a dime (big

spender) and placed it in her outstretched hand. She cupped it tightly, closed

her eyes and grimaced, formulating her wish. I stared at that little

scrunched-up face and said my own kind of prayer of thanks, feeling so

blessed to still have this ball of energy in my life. And then like a shooting

star, the coin was flung into the foaming water and with it, her wish.

We happily continued our stroll into the familiar section of the mall. An eerie

silence ensued, which I was admittedly uncomfortable with. I couldn't resist

breaking it.

"Aren't you gonna tell daddy what you wished for?"

She retorted "I wished I could get an ice-cream comb".

I just about lost it right then and there. Couldn't imagine what the shoppers

thought of this lunatic laughing uncontrollably in the middle of a crowded

mall. And needless to say, she got her wish, and two treats.

Little did I know then that my beautiful little girl would soon embark on a

long road of seizures, surgeries, special schools, medications and end up

partially paralyzed on her right side. She never learned to ride a bike.

Today, she is almost seventeen. She cannot use her right hand and walks

with a noticeable limp. But she has overcome what life seemed to so cruelly

inflict on her. She was teased a lot and always struggled in school, both

socially and academically. But each year she showed improvement. She is

planning a career in early childhood education. With one year still remaining

in high school, her and I, one night not too long ago mapped out all the

courses she would need to take in community college. It was her idea. She

volunteers weekly at a local hospital, on the children's floor. She baby-sits a

neighbors children five days a week. On her own this year, she stood outside

in line for four hours on a cold Canadian January afternoon and enrolled

herself, with her own babysitting money, into two courses she felt she would

need for college.

You see, to her failure was never an option.

It would almost be redundant for me to explain why I wanted to share this

story with you. She IS my daughter and I carry all those fatherly biases with

me wherever I go. But these aside, she is a very exceptional person and one

that I admire and have learned a lot from.

It is my sincerest hope that her story will have even a momentary positive

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impact on you as a human being, a parent, a spouse or even, an

entrepreneur.

I'd like to leave you with a closing thought. As human beings, we deserve all

the treats, and the multitude of good things that life can offer us. We all have

wishes and dreams, AND the power to make them reality. Just simple truths

of the universe.

We can wish for, and get, that ice-cream comb.

Rick Beneteau is the author of the best-selling marketing

eBook, The Ezine Marketing Machine at:

http://www.ezinemoney.net

Rick invites you to partner with him in his top rated

affiliate programs at:

http://www.interniche.net

and,

subscribe to his FREE, highly acclaimed Mirror Ezine:

http://www.themirrorezine.com

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