Lesson 1

Table of Contents

Introduction..............................................................................................................................

How to Use this Book..............................................................................................................

Part 1: EFT Basics ...................................................................................................................

The EFT Routine .....................................................................................................

EFT At a Glance......................................................................................................

Part 2: The Build Your Money Muscles Program ...............................................................

1. Condition Yourself for Change ............................................................................

2. Develop Financial Awareness.............................................................................

3. Identify the Financial Themes in Your Life..........................................................

4. Identify and Release Your Money Feelings ........................................................

5. Deal with Your Financial Blocks..........................................................................

6. Identify and Release Your Fear of Success........................................................

7. Create Realistic Goals.........................................................................................

8. Take Care of Your Money ...................................................................................

9. Support Yourself on Every Level.........................................................................

Part 3. Prosperity Tools ........................................................................................................

Your Money Profile..................................................................................................

Net Worth Form.......................................................................................................

Monthly Expense Record ........................................................................................

The Feelings List .....................................................................................................

Support Assessment Tool .......................................................................................

Part 4. Articles........................................................................................................................

Abandonment Issues and Your Money ...................................................................

Letting Go Meditation ..............................................................................................

Changing Your Thoughts ........................................................................................

Convoluted Beliefs ..................................................................................................

Part 5. Resources

EFT Resources .......................................................................................................

Online Financial Resources ....................................................................................

On ProsperityPlace.com..........................................................................................

Introduction

Congratulations! The fact that you are reading this book means that you have made the
decision to change how you deal with money. If you do the simple exercises that you’ll
find here, I promise your whole life will improve.

The thousands of people who visit ProsperityPlace.com are interested in increasing their
income and creating abundance in every area of their lives even though most have
never had a surplus of funds and many are in debt. The fantasy often is that a large pile
of money will suddenly show up. But, the fact is that unless a person is emotionally
prepared for wealth, it is difficult to create it and almost impossible to maintain it.

You could be given all of the financial education that is available, but if you aren’t
prepared internally to deal with the life changes that increased income brings, you will
feel overwhelmed by prosperity.

The concept behind Build Your Money Muscles is that if you gradually build up both the
inner and outer resources needed to handle increasingly large sums of money, creating
wealth will happen almost effortlessly. By focusing on your inner blocks to prosperity and
gradually establishing healthy financial habits, your prosperity is assured.

Are the Build Your Money Muscles exercises really simple? Yes, especially with the use
of EFT, which you’ll read about in Part 1. The exercises do take concentration over a
period of time, but the principles behind the exercises are remarkably simple. The
moment you start doing the exercises you will benefit. And, unlike the way physical
exercise works, once you learn and begin to apply each exercise, you’ll never lose what
you gain – even if you stop doing the work. Just by reading the book, your awareness
will change and you will begin your transformation.

I Know This System Works
The material in this volume developed over a twenty-five-year period. It evolved from
techniques I used to help myself from a point of severe financial dysfunction,
characterized by under-earning and debting, to a place of financial comfort.

During my financial transformation, I discovered that it was impossible to change my
financial condition without going through a corresponding internal transformation. In
order for my finances to change, I had to change my approach to life and what I was
expressing through my life stories.

I started on my financial quest because I needed to understand why I had so much
trouble functioning financially. Although I also had severe physical challenges that I was
addressing simultaneously, it was clear that I had to deal directly with the cause of my
under-earning and debting. My two younger brothers were both successful financially,
while I was the one who often had to be rescued by my parents or my brothers.

In 1983, one of my brothers, who was tired of having to rescue me, said that I needed to
go to a 12-Step program. A friend of his was having a much easier time dealing with her
life with the help of the program. I started with Overeaters Anonymous (I was definitely
eating compulsively), but was soon introduced to Debtors Anonymous (DA), which had
recently started in Los Angeles where I was living.

At DA, I was introduced to the concept that I was using debting as an emotional fix – the
same way I had used eating. In order to get to the cause of my under-earning and
debting, I had to understand the emotions behind my behaviors.

The DA program worked well for me. By 1984, I started a business that grew to be a
successful wholesale, retail and mail order venture. It quickly grew to the point where in
1987 I grossed over $325,000. Then, at the end of 1987, my father died, which totally
knocked me off center.

Within months, I was $40,000 in debt. Shortly after my father’s death, I had started using
credit cards, buying inventory on credit instead of for cash, which I had been doing, and
buying far more inventory than I needed. I started making a lot of bad decisions, and by
March of 1988, it was clear that I had to either borrow a lot of money to get the business
back on track or close it.

In June, 1988, not only did I close the business, but within a few months filed for
bankruptcy. Looking back on everything, I realize that because I was unable to
effectively express my grief for my father, I created a situation that let me grieve by
losing a business that I really loved.

I also see that because I experienced a sudden inflow of a large amount of money
without the benefit of a financial education, I was overwhelmed by the money as it came
in. I still remember how hyper I got about a week after I mailed out 50,000 catalogs when
I received over $5,000 in orders. I had never had that much money come in the mail in
one day and it was too much for me to handle. I learned the hard way that managing
money takes skill and finesse.

As my business was disintegrating, one of my DA friends suggested that I go to
Codependents Anonymous (CoDA), where I came to understand a lot of the underlying
causes of my financial as well as personal dysfunction.

My healing seemed to take forever. While I was working on all of my emotional and
financial issues, I also had to fix a physical body that had a long list of disorders. At one
point, I was told by a medical doctor that I would never be healthy and that I should learn
to live with my disorders – and, of course, take lots of prescription drugs. I didn’t like
hearing that and decided that I would find a way to prove the doctor wrong.

The story of my journey to health could be the subject of an entire book, so I’m not going
to tell it here. Suffice it to say that I am now very healthy and very pleased with the
results of my efforts.

Because I like to share knowledge, at every stage of my transformation, I found a way to
share what I was learning with others. In August of 1995, I discovered the Internet and
knew immediately that it would play a large part in my life. By November, 1995 I had my
first site that has evolved into Prosperity Place®, where I teach a holistic approach to
improving one’s relationship with money. As I continue to evolve financially, I share what
I learn with my site visitors.

A Word about Emotional Freedom Techniques
The introduction of Emotional Freedom Techniques™ (EFT) to the work I do has added
a dimension that allows for the clearing of old emotions, beliefs and habits in a relatively
short period of time. Once the intense emotional triggers are removed, it is easier to get
on with the work of creating a substantial income flow.

I knew when I wrote Prosperity Is an Inside Job, which has been available at
ProsperityPlace.com, that something was missing. Although it is a comprehensive book
about the basic premise of creating our reality with our thoughts, beliefs and emotions, I
felt there wasn’t enough information about clearing emotions. When I found EFT, as you
will learn in the introduction to the EFT section, I knew I had found a missing piece that
would help people move quickly forward. It is easy to learn the basics and EFT can be
done, in many cases, without a practitioner.

Since I found EFT in October, 2001, I have felt remarkable shifts not only for myself but
for many of my coaching clients. Although I had been through many kinds of therapies
over the years, I have never found anything like EFT for getting rid of, once and for all,
the emotional charge behind previous life events and traumas.

I hope you will take the time to introduce yourself to EFT. The rewards can be
enormous. I know the material will be new to a lot of you and may seem a bit simplistic.
It’s not unusual for people to think that it seems much too simple to be effective. But
upon trying it, more than eighty percent of those who evaluate the procedure experience
positive results. It may require that you suspend your disbelief for a moment or two. The
wonderful thing about EFT is that you don’t have to believe it will work in order for it to
have a positive effect.

This is not a book about EFT. It is about building your money muscles. EFT is one of the
tools that is used. Although I present the basics of EFT here, if you want to delve deeply
into the subject, you will have to follow up with some of the online resources that are
mentioned in the EFT Resources section. (Most of the information about EFT that is
available is found online.)

Part 1. EFT Basics

An Introduction to EFT

In October of 2001, while surfing the Internet, I came upon a notice for a teleclass in
Emotional Freedom Techniques™. I had no idea what EFT was, but instinctively knew
that it was something I had to learn.

Not only did I take that course, but I read everything I could about this emerging – and
exciting – technique and watched every video offered by Gary Craig, the developer of
EFT. From the very beginning, I saw that EFT was the missing piece I was looking for.

For more than twenty years, I had been examining and helping people understand how
emotions affect our ability to create a prosperous life. Using techniques I developed, it
had become quite easy for me to identify family-of-origin experiences and traumas that
affect a person’s ability to create and sustain a comfortable, financially secure life.

But once the origins of the problems were identified, I didn’t have any place to go with
people to address the deep issues that emerged, except to suggest that clients go to
traditional therapy, a solution which didn’t satisfy me and many clients couldn’t afford.
Then I found EFT, and I knew that this simple technique could help thousands of people
address long-standing issues in a relatively brief period of time.

Financial issues are always related to non-financial emotional issues, such as
abandonment, betrayal, abuse and low self-esteem. In order for a person to create
lasting change in their financial situation, it is necessary to address these issues. EFT
provides a way to do this that individuals can learn and often effectively do for
themselves.

In this section, I’m going to present a brief introduction to EFT and how it is done. I
suggest that you listen to the audios that are referenced in this book that you will find on
ProsperityPlace.com.

Where EFT came from
Roger Callahan, Ph.D, is a psychologist who had a successful traditional practice,
although he had begun to examine alternative therapies such as applied kinesiology and
acupuncture. In 1980, Dr. Callahan had a serendipitous experience with a client who
had an extreme water phobia. The phobia suddenly disappeared completely when Dr.
Calhan tapped on a specific acupuncture point to treat the patient’s stomach disorder.
Astounded by the results, Dr. Callahan began developing and refining a system he
called Thought Field Therapy.

Dr. Callahan’s system was fairly complex and expensive to learn. He was actually
charging $100,000 to take his complete course. Although his technique was very

effective, it was far beyond the reach of most laypeople who needed help – and most
professionals.

Enter Gary Craig, an engineer by training, who was very interested in finding personal
development tools. As Gary explored different avenues of psychology, he became
discouraged because available therapies took a long time to administer and often had a
limited effect in terms of lasting relief.

When Gary was introduced to Dr. Callahan and his work, he was astounded by the
results he witnessed. Although he was skeptical, he did a lot of research into the body’s
energy system. He decided to take Dr. Callahan’s $100,000 course and learned
everything that the good doctor had to offer.

Dr. Callahan discovered that all negative emotions are caused by a disruption in the
body/mind’s energy system. This energy system is made up of the pathways known
as meridians in Chinese medicine (acupuncture). By tapping on certain meridian points
while concentrating on the disturbance, the energy disruption can be reversed and relief
experienced.

Gary took what he learned from Dr. Callahan to a new level. The most complicated part
of Dr. Callahan’s system was the diagnosis. It often took five to ten minutes to decide on
a treatment protocol. Once diagnosed, the practitioner knew exactly which points on the
meridian system to treat with a simple tapping technique.

There were only twelve points that were used by Dr. Callahan. To tap on all of the points
took less than thirty seconds. Gary reasoned that instead of spending so much time
diagnosing a problem, why not just tap on all of the points and see what happens.

It worked. As a matter of fact, Gary discovered that the system worked when using only
eight of the points. These are the points that are now used in the majority of cases.

Gary has spent years spreading the word about EFT. A talented speaker and
communicator, he has given a number of seminars and maintains a website through
which he shares a lot of information and video tapes of his seminars. On his site,

www.emofree.com

, there is a free EFT manual, many case histories that explain how

EFT is used for a wide range of discomforts, and an ongoing mailing list that you can
subscribe to.

Throughout this book, I’m going to make suggestions as to how you can use EFT to
facilitate your financial growth. I’ll also present some examples of how EFT has been
used.

EFT removes emotional blocks. It does not do the actual work of changing how you deal
with your life. Once the blocks are removed, you have the opportunity to move forward. It
is up to you as to how you use that opportunity.

The EFT Routine

I have been using EFT and teaching it through my site and teleclasses since October,
2001. Although I specialize in using EFT for financial issues, it can be used to treat many
different physical and emotional disorders.

I have seen it used effectively for headaches, backaches, and many kinds of physical
pain. Personally, I had a serious energy problem that I had tried treating in many ways
from which I found relief in about two weeks with EFT.

With clients, I have used it for weight loss, smoking addiction and food addictions.
Phobias, post-traumatic stress syndrome, and myriad other problems also respond to
treatment with EFT.

What we are going to look at here is the basic instructions for EFT and a brief
introduction to using it for financial issues. In each exercise that is outlined in this book, I
offer additional suggestions for using EFT. If you want to go further with EFT, I strongly
suggest that you download Gary Craig’s EFT Manual, which is free. (See EFT
Resources on

page 91

The basic theory behind EFT is that all negative emotions
and behaviors, and many of the physical discomforts that
they cause, are the result of disruptions to your body’s
energy system.

The energy system refers to the meridians which are used in Chinese Acupuncture.
These are energy channels that are connected to all of your major organs that run
throughout your body. When an acupuncturist works on a patient, they adjust the energy
with the use of needles. In EFT, the same thing is done without needles. Instead, your
fingers are used to tap on certain points.

Psychological Reversal
Psychological reversal happens when your energy system is reversed. It’s like putting
the batteries in a flash light the wrong way. The electrical current can’t flow. When the
polarity in your energy system is reversed, you don’t die, but many things don’t work
properly.

This reversal is why some dis-eases, especially those that are chronic, do not respond to
various therapies. It also explains why people have trouble losing weight, giving up
addicting substances or changing destructive habits. It is also the reason why people
sabotage themselves.

Psychological reversal is caused by negative thinking and false beliefs. It’s the
phenomenon that keeps you from realizing your goals no matter how many affirmations
you do or how many times you try to change a particular behavior.

Gary Craig has stated that psychological reversal is present, on average, forty percent of
the time. The degree to which it occurs varies from person to person as well as within an
individual, depending on the issue that is being addressed.

Because treating psychological reversal only takes about ten seconds, before each
round of EFT, a “setup” is always used to set the stage for the meridian treatment. By
using it each time, you don’t have to guess whether psychological reversal is present or
not.

The Setup
Each treatment round is begun with a setup phrase. The setup includes a statement of
the problem along with a neutralizing affirmation that counteracts negative thinking. Here
are some examples of setup phrases:

• Even though I have this fear of heights, I deeply and completely love and support

myself.

• Even though I have this pain in my lower back, I deeply and completely love and

support myself.

• Even though I was embarrassed when I bounced a check last week, I deeply and

completely love and support myself.

• Even though I feel depressed, I deeply and completely love and support myself.
• Even though I hate to balance my checkbook, I deeply and completely love and

support myself.

• Even though I believe I can never be a success, I deeply and completely love

and support myself.

The setup phrase is repeated three times while either rubbing on the sore spot or
tapping the karate chop point, both of which are on the diagram on page 14. Some
people find the sore spot more effective, but most people like to use the karate chop
point. If you are working on a stubborn issue, use the sore spot.

The Sequence
The setup is followed by a round of EFT called The Sequence. You will see the points
listed and shown on the diagram on page 14. Once you do the setup, you will tap on
each of the points about seven times while you repeat a reminder phrase.

The reminder phrase is a short statement of the problem to keep you focused on the
problem as you tap. For example, if your setup phrase started with Even though I was
embarrassed when I bounced a check last week, your reminder phase would be,
embarrassed when I bounced a check.

You continue to repeat the reminder phrase as you go through all of the points, except
those that are in the Nine Gamut Procedure.

How Bad Is It?
Before starting a round of EFT (The Setup plus The Sequence), it is advisable to
evaluate the intensity of your problem using a scale from 0 to 10, 0 being nothing and 10
being awful.

When you think about a situation or a problem you are having, take a “reading” on how
you are feeling. If you are all choked up with emotion and on the verge of tears, that’s
probably a 10 – and a prime candidate for EFT.

After you do a round of EFT, measure again how you feel. If the number goes down to 0,
then you are through. If the number is more than 0 or 1, then you are going to want to do
another round.

New Phrase
When doing subsequent rounds on the same problem, you can adjust the setup and
reminder phrase to include the word “still have” or “remaining” For example:
The setup: Even though I am still embarrassed because I bounced a check last week, I
deeply and completely love and support myself.
The reminder phrase: Remaining embarrassment.

After you finish the second round, take another intensity measurement. If necessary, do
another round.

What If There Is No Change or The Number Goes Up
There are three main reasons why, after doing a round of EFT, you may not notice a
change or the number can actually go up. The reasons are:

•  The setup phrase was not specific enough
•  Other aspects of the problem came up when you were tapping
•  “Energy toxins”

If, while you are tapping, something else comes up for you, this is probably another
aspect of the problem that is surfacing. For example, if you are tapping on an incident
when someone punished you when you were young, you might also have to deal with
your feelings about being punished, feelings you have toward the punisher, your fear of
trying to do something daring again, etc. Each of these is an aspect of one energy
disturbance.

Some people are affected by “energy toxins” that can be foods, pollutants, allergens.
Common toxins are perfume, sugar, wheat, coffee, alcohol, nicotine. If this is the
problem, although it rarely is, then you will have to avoid the toxin for a few days to get it
out of your system.

Doing EFT
NOTE: On ProsperityPlace.com there is an audio of the following EFT instructions that
will lead you through an EFT session. Access this audio through

www.ProsperityPlace.com/money

If you’ll look at the large diagram above, you will see two different kind of points. First are
the points called the sore spot. Take your index finger and see if you can locate the point
on one side of your body. Keep pressing until you find the spot that is a little sore. You
might have to press deeply to find it. For now, just remember where it is.

Now, as we go through the other points, I’d like you to use the index finger and the
middle finger on one hand, either one, to tap on each of the points. (Most people use
their dominant hand to do the tapping.) During a treatment, you’ll tap 7 to 10 times on
each of the points. As we go through this point review now, just tap a few times.

First, find the karate chop point. This is along the edge of the fleshy part of your hand.
Tap it with the fingers of your opposite hand. This is done during the setup.

Now let’s review the other spots.

First is the spot on the inside of the eyebrow. Not between the eyes, but just at the
beginning of your eyebrow.. Tap that a few times. Next is the spot on the outside of the
eyebrow. Tap Tap Tap. You can do this on either side of your body. Don’t pound on the
spots, just tap them.

Next is under your eye, under the middle of your eyeball if you are looking straight
ahead. Next is under your nose. Then, between your mouth and chin, in that indentation.

Next is the collarbone spot. First find the end of the collarbone on each side. Using your
thumb and index finger, you’ll find two bumps, one on either side of the center of your
neck. Can you feel the two bumps? These are what I’m calling the end of the collarbone.
Now on one side, either left or right, go down about an inch below the end of the
collarbone. That’s the collarbone point.

The last point on the body is under your arm. You’ll have to lift your arm for this one. It’s
a few inches below your armpit. For women, it’s about where your bra goes around
under your arm.

These are the points that are used for The Shortcut. But let’s review the other points as
well.

First, let’s do the points on your hand. Tap just on the outside edge of your thumbnail.
Tap tap tap, the edge of the nail of your index finger, the same place on your middle
finger, then the same place on your pinky.

The last spot is in the third picture on the web page. It’s on the back of your hand. We
call this the gamut point. It’s used for what is called the Nine Gamut Procedure, which
we only use on occasion as a brain balancer.

Try this:
Now, let’s go through an actual round of EFT.

I’m going to pick an issue that often comes up for people who are doing prosperity work.
If you don’t think it applies to you, then when I suggest the setup phrase, you can just
say something that applies to you.

Let’s do one for “I don’t deserve to be wealthy.” This belief is often present when people
are working to create financial comfort. They might say they deserve it, but underneath
is that reversal that says, you don’t deserve it.

Start by closing your eyes and thinking about the statement “I don’t deserve to be
wealthy.” What kind of feelings does saying that to yourself bring up for you? Think of
yourself as always struggling financially. Can you see that picture? As you go into that
feeling, think about where you are feeling discomfort. Then decide, on a scale of 0 to 10,
0 being none and 10 being awful, how intense the discomfort is.

Now let’s do the treatment.
Tap on the karate chop point or rub on the sore spot while you say,
“Even though I don’t deserve to be wealthy and I feel that no matter how hard I try I’ll
never be wealthy, I deeply and completely love and support myself.”

Again
“Even though I don’t deserve to be wealthy and I feel that no matter how hard I try I’ll
never be wealthy, I deeply and completely love and support myself.”

And again,
“Even though I don’t deserve to be wealthy and I feel that no matter how hard I try I’ll
never be wealthy, I deeply and completely love and support myself.”

Now, as we tap on the other points, let’s use the reminder phrase, “don’t deserve
wealth.” Remember, you’ll tap about seven to ten times.
Tap inside your eyebrow as you say “don’t deserve wealth”
Now outside your eyebrow tap tap tap “don’t deserve wealth”
Under your eye “don’t deserve wealth”
Under your nose “don’t deserve wealth”
On your chin “don’t deserve wealth”
The collarbone point “don’t deserve wealth
Under your arm “don’t deserve wealth”
Outside edge of thumbnail “don’t deserve wealth
Index finger “don’t deserve wealth
Middle finger “don’t deserve wealth

Part 2: The Build Your Money Muscles Program

The basic premise of The Build Your Money Muscles Program is that in order to improve
your financial situation, you need to gradually develop both the internal and external
skills necessary to deal with increasingly large sums of money. It is like any muscle
building program where you gradually build up strength and agility with the use of certain
exercises.

Because money touches something within us that goes far deeper than just a sum of
currency, having money can create havoc when a person is not prepared to deal with it.
People often think that their lives will magically improve if only they had a specific sum of
money – usually more than they have ever had at one time. But, the fact is, that if the
sum of money arrived that they had wished for, they would have no idea what to do with
it, except to spend it – and exhaust their resources.

By developing the kind of awareness about money and your relationship to it that is
taught in The Build Your Money Muscles Program, you will have the skills to both create
and sustain wealth on a level that you have never known before. New worlds can open
up to you as you become more confident in your own ability to support yourself and deal
with money.

Each of you who is reading this will have a unique way of expressing yourself financially.
Hopefully, the skills you gain by doing the exercises in this book, along with the
resources that are available on Prosperity Place, will lead you to a creative financial
expression that works for you.

The Basic Concepts
The Build Your Money Muscles Program is based on a series of concepts that are at the
core of everything I teach about money. I’m going to briefly outline them here and touch
upon each of these throughout this book.

Concept #1
We create our own reality with our thoughts, beliefs and emotions (TBEs). In order to
change our lives, we have to change our TBE’s and the habits we have developed over
the years. In order to create prosperity, we have to change our thoughts, beliefs and
emotions as they relate to money and wealth and the concept of our self-worth.

Concept #2
Life happens through us, not to us. When a person is willing to take responsibility for his
or her life and chooses to give up negative thinking and destructive behavior patterns,
one’s life can change and move in a positive direction. Although you are affected by your
past history, you can rise above this and create a new set of life stories with positive
endings.

Concept #3
Money, by itself, has no power. It is only when it passes between two people or entities
that it has energy. Therefore, money can be defined as the energy of relationship, and
how you deal with money is how you deal with your relationship with yourself and others.

Although I have a strong belief in a Higher Power, I do not believe that It micro-manages
our life stories. I believe our Higher Power, whatever you want to call it, is an energy
force and intelligence that flows through all of life. The journey is learning how to tap into
that energy force and become a conscious co-creator with it. In order to do this, you
have to be open and present.

All of the material on Prosperity Place and in this volume is built on the theory of
personal responsibility. It assumes that each of us has the power to create whatever we
want if we are willing to get ourselves into the right state of consciousness. There is an
underlying belief that our lives are an extension of our inner perceptions.

I realize that it appears that events take place in life over which we have no control. The
events of September 11, 2001 would seem to be in this category. However, I also
believe that there is a group consciousness and that global events are the extension of
our global consciousness.

People who know me have heard me say that I don’t think we come here to have a good
time. I believe we come here to grow and evolve and learn to become conscious co-
creators with the Universal Force. While we are learning, we can have a good time.

The Build Your Money Muscles Program and the material on Prosperity Place is about
developing positive thoughts, beliefs and emotions along with real and measurable skills
for living. This includes financial skills for those who want to improve their relationship
with money. The exercises in this book are meant to serve as a foundation upon which
you will build your financial skills. Spending the time that is needed to complete the work
in this book will give you the inner skills to deal with a changing lifestyle. My hope for you
is that you can build a healthy financial future without being overwhelmed by the energy
that increased income brings.

Integrating EFT
During the many years that I have been doing prosperity work both with individuals and
groups, it has become clear to me that the inability to create a comfortable income or to
stay out of debt is always related to personal issues that have their base in early
childhood. As you will learn in Exercise 4, whatever financial problems you are having
are just an expression of feelings you have buried inside of you.

It’s never about money. It’s always about what is going on inside of you. That’s why so
much of this program involves getting in touch with your internal world. With the

Exercise 1. Condition Yourself for Change

Introduction

Most people resist change. Why change when you are familiar with everything you do

now? Your life is relatively predictable. The problem is that what you are doing may not
be serving you, especially what you are doing with your money. If financial comfort is
your goal and you aren’t comfortable now, then obviously, something has to change.

As I mentioned in the Introduction to EFT, people often avoid change because of
psychological reversal. When this is present, simply doing EFT can overcome
resistance. However, going through a major transformation means training yourself to
embrace change, even look forward to it. Only by changing can you create something
new – and isn’t that what you want to do?

Your Life Is a Habit
The way you live your life is a habit. You probably have certain routines that you use on
a daily basis that make your life predictable. People usually have a limited number of
foods they eat, places they go to shop, friends they talk to or visit with, roads they drive
on and leisure activities that occupy their time.

How you deal with money is a habit. Some of you regularly balance your checkbook and
keep track of your spending and earning. Others make a habit of ignoring the
bookkeeping and not paying attention to your finances. Some people habitually debt,
others save regularly and still others are always living on the edge, never sure whether
the money they need is going to be there.

Your thoughts are a habit. If you were to record your thoughts, you'd probably find the
playback experience quite boring. You'll hear the same thoughts being played over and
over again.

Your beliefs are habits that are often learned from your parents. Religious, social and
political beliefs are most often old habits that rarely get examined or changed, no matter
how they may not serve the believer.

Your feelings, and this includes your money feelings, which we will look at in Exercise 4,
are a habit. Many people habitually feel overwhelmed, stressed out, tired, frustrated,
trapped and disconnected. Even if they have a strong wish to feel differently, they never
seem to be able to change their feeling habits.

Relationships often repeat themselves. If you’ve experienced a series of relationships,
you might find that one partner is exchanged for another, but basically it’s the same story
over and over again.

Most people also have behavior patterns that they can count on to help them get what
they perceive that they need from others, be it attention, love, reinforcement, etc. These
behavior patterns become familiar habits that have a predictable outcome. Even if the
outcomes are negative, people cling to the familiar behavior patterns because of the
predictability of the outcomes.

Change of Habit
In order to change the outcomes of your life stories, you have to create new habits.
You've probably heard that insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting
different results. There is no doubt about the fact that if you don't like the path your life is
taking, you – and only you – are going to have to change something in order to move in
a new direction.

You may know this already. As a matter of fact, you may already have tried to make
changes, but find yourself stuck in the same old groove. As a result, you may have
resigned yourself to the fact that your wishes will never come true because what you
have done hasn't worked for you.

I'm going to assume that no matter how many times your attempts to change your life
have been unsuccessful, that you haven't given up. If you had, you probably wouldn't be
reading this. So, I'll assume there really is some spunk in you, even if it is buried deep
inside, and that you are willing to give change another chance.

Creating prosperity, for many of you, means a dramatic change of habits on many levels.
You will have to change what you are expressing through money as well as how you
take care of your money on a daily basis.

If you have problems creating or keeping money, then there are other areas in you life
that are also going to need attention and change. This may mean cleaning up your
house, tending to your personal habits, connecting to more people, changing your
thoughts, beliefs and emotions, and much more.

Does this seem overwhelming? If your energy isn't great, it is sure to seem like a lot to
do. What we are going to do is to break down suggested actions into small chunks so
that the perception is that you only have to make small changes.

We are also going to talk about making change a new habit. Being/feeling stuck is a
habit. The trick is to transform that habit into one of being habituated to change.

I love change and do it often. The thrift stores in my area are happy to help me with the
process. Having the change habit means that it's easy for me to realistically evaluate
and take advantage of opportunities that come along, even if I will have to make major
changes. It also means that I'm adaptable and flexible in most areas of my life.

I believe that my ability to comfortably make changes is one of the things that keeps me
young for my age. Although I am in my sixties, I have the energy of a much younger
person and am completely healthy, even though I had been sick for many years. I'm
convinced that when you embrace change, it affects you on a cellular level.

In this exercise, we are going to approach change in a way that, hopefully, will make you
less afraid of it and more willing to try new ways of thinking and behaving.

At first, what I suggest my seem totally unrelated to creating a better relationship with
money. That's ok. It's the process of change that matters here.

Exercise 1 Actions:

1. Create a Prosperity Journal.

A Prosperity Journal is a place to keep track of your progress as you work The
Build Your Money Muscles Program. You can use your Prosperity Journal to
create a record of where you are now and what you do to change your financial
situation. You can also use it to record your fears and/or resistance, affirm your
successes, make note of questions that arise, or anything else you want to write
about. It’s a way of keeping in touch with the part of you that will be emerging as
a result of this work.

Carefully choose a notebook or unlined book to use. I like to use a spiral-bound
sketch book so that I'm not bound in by lines. Date each entry.

Try to write something every day or every other day, especially when you first
start. This is a great way to stay in touch with whatever feelings the process is
going to bring up.

You can draw pictures, or free-form drawings. You don't have to be good at
drawing, just draw whatever comes up. This is only for you.

Paste in pictures or articles that have meaning for you.

Be as creative as you want in your Prosperity Journal

2. Define your character.

My brother wrote and produced a major sitcom for a number of years. Part of the
process of creating scripts was to talk about the characters and how they would
behave in a particular situation. The story line and the jokes had to stay within
the boundaries of the individual characters.

How would you define the character that you are playing in this life drama? If you
were writing a book and your character was in the book, how would you describe
it? Take some time to actually write out the definition of your character.

As you go about your day, observe yourself and your behavior. What do you see
that you do that maintains the integrity of your character? Do you like the
character you are playing? Once you take the time to clearly define your
character, you may decide that you don’t want to play the role you are playing
any longer. Perhaps, like a type-cast actor, you want to play the same role over
and over. But, you have the option of creating whatever character you wish.

You may want to behave in a way that is out of character, but you may not have
the courage to do this. Changing the way your character behaves can possibly
create opposition from others who expect you to act in character. The
expectations of others could keep you from making changes that are in keeping
with who you are today.

As you go about your day, think about how you would like to act out of character.
Write down what you observe in your Prosperity Journal. When you feel really
courageous, do something that is out of character.

3. What would you like to change?

Make a list, even if it is a short one for now, of what you would like to change in
your life.

Wanting to change something doesn't mean you have to dislike or be dissatisfied
with what you have now, although it is certainly a good idea to change whatever
makes you uncomfortable. You can actually be satisfied with your current life, yet
still want to move forward. That means making changes.

4. Make one very small change.

Here are a few suggestions:

•

Put your toothbrush in a different place

•

Drive down a different street to go someplace you travel to frequently.

•

Get up a few minutes earlier than you usually do, or stay up a bit later.

•

Watch a different news channel

•

Read a new magazine

•

Replace one serving of cake or ice-cream with a healthier snack

•

Smile at someone new

•

Go to a meeting you've thought about going to, but never got there

•

Change the direction that the toilet paper in your bathroom rolls

•

Eat a new food.

•

Use a different brand of automobile fuel

•

Go to a different grocery store to shop

•

Listen to some new music

•

Write down your money for one day.

•

Read something new

•

Talk to someone you have been avoiding.

(You'll see that the words "different" and "new" keep showing up.)

5. Make an agreement with your self that it is ok to feel uncomfortable or
disoriented.

You can be sure that if you do any of the actions I suggested in this exercise, you
will feel uncomfortable. Even putting your toothbrush in a different place can
stimulate feelings of discomfort, because you are doing something unfamiliar.

These feelings of discomfort are what keep people stuck where they are. People
aren't willing to feel uncomfortable for a relatively short period of time in order to
make progress.

Think about a time when you moved to a new city or a new house. You probably
suffered from what I call the Moving Stupids. When you are moving into
someplace that is unfamiliar, you don’t know where things are, you often make
what turns out to be stupid or inefficient decisions and you feel generally
disoriented. But eventually, you adapt and the new place feels familiar.

As you begin to change your consciousness, the same thing happens. You know
exactly how to behave in order to get what you need, even if you do negative
behaviors. Once you start to move in a new direction, you will need to develop a
new set of behaviors. This can feel uncomfortable and unstable. But, in time, the
new behavior will become a habit and feel familiar.

Successful people are willing to be uncomfortable as they move their lives
forward. Are you?

6. Create new habits.

Repeat whatever you choose to do in #3 above until it is comfortable. Then do
something else. Again, go through the discomfort until the activity becomes
second nature.

The purpose of this lesson is to help you condition yourself for change by
adapting to small changes before doing anything major. Actually, major changes
can be the result of a series of small changes.

7. EFT for this Exercise

Whenever you find yourself resisting one of the exercises in this book, you can
follow the basic EFT instructions found in Part 1.

SETUP PHRASES:
Note: The phrase “I deeply and completely love and accept myself is often used
by other practitioners with setup phrases. I like to use “love and support myself”
when it applies to financial issues.

Exercise 2. Develop Financial Awareness

Introduction

Awareness is the first step in the process of change. When you raise your level of
awareness, change begins to happen automatically. Take a moment now to put all of
your attention in your jaw and notice the tension there. As you do this, you will see that
your jaw automatically relaxes a bit. Your awareness created the change.

There are two areas where it is important to develop financial awareness. One is
internal, the other is external. Internal awareness is about understanding how you feel
and react to money and financial subjects. It also means understanding how you use
money to express feelings that are totally unrelated to money. We will discuss this at
length in this book.

External awareness means paying attention both to your own financial situation on a
regular basis and being aware of the financial world. This includes financial markets, the
business world, and investments. If you wish to be prosperous, you need to understand
how to make and grow money. We will touch briefly on these subjects in this book.

Most people suffer from what I call Financial Vagueness Syndrome. It’s not uncommon
for people to be unsure about how much money they have, how much they spend, or
how much they own. Instead of dealing with specific numbers, there is a vague fear that
there isn’t enough and that major mistakes are going to be made.

So, the first step in The Build Your Money Muscles Program is to develop an awareness
of every aspect of your financial situation, both internally and externally. That’s what this
exercise is about.

This exercise will take time to complete. As soon as you begin the process of increasing
your awareness, you can begin to do the next exercise. Don’t feel that you have to
complete the whole awareness exercise before you move on. It is a process that will
weave in and out of everything else that is in this book.

Exercise 2 Actions:

1. Do a financial inventory

Developing financial awareness means paying attention to what you have and
what you are doing with it. If you have been vague with your money, then there is
probably something about counting your money that frightens you. This is often
related to the fact that many people connect their self worth to the amount of
money they have.

Once you start paying attention to your money, you will be able to see that it is
just numbers, not who you are. If you find yourself resisting this, do the EFT
exercises below.

Here’s the start of your financial inventory:
Fill out

Your Money Profile

. (Tools Section, page 73). Date this and keep in your

Prosperity Journal.

Determine you current

Net Worth

. (Tools Section, page 74.)

You can complete this online and have the math done for you and the results
emailed to you. To complete online, go to

www.ProsperityPlace.com/money/

2. Keep track of your daily/weekly expenses

This ongoing exercise will help you develop discipline and overcome financial
vagueness. You may find yourself resisting this exercise. That's not unusual. But
if you want to move forward in your quest for prosperity, you will start this as
soon as possible – and overcome your resistance.

It is quite simple. Get a small spiral notebook that you take with you everywhere.
In it, write down everything that you spend and earn. EVERYTHING. Even the
coins you put in a parking meter. If you prefer to use your organizer, that's fine,
as long as you write everything down every day.

Once you start doing this, you will never again wonder where all of your money
went. You will know exactly where it goes.

If you keep your records in Quicken®, or another computer-based program, be
sure to record all of your checks, credit card charges – and income – at least
three times a week. In Exercise 8, we will talk more about using a computer
program to keep track of your money.

If you aren’t good at keeping credit card receipts, many credit card companies let
you check your account online. At least once a week, you can go to the site and
get a list of the charges you have accrued.

In this exercise, you are just going to write down your money. When we get to
Exercise 8, you will get a chance to add everything up.

3. Be aware of the financial messages you get from the media

At this point in time, the economy of the United States and other countries
around the world are dependent upon consumer spending. Advertising is all
about getting you, the consumer, to spend more – even more than you might
have in available funds.

Developing healthy financial habits requires that you learn to think for yourself
and not be sucked in by media messages that encourage you to covet all sorts of
material goods rather than peace of mind.

This exercise is about becoming aware of the messages that you hear every day.
Watch for ads on radio and television and newspapers and in the mail that
comes directly to your door that encourage you to spend more and increase the
amount of credit you are using.

Remember that people who write these ads are experts in hitting the
psychological buttons that will make you want more and more and more. The ads
never teach about being satisfied and content.

You have to decide who controls your financial life. If you do, then you will learn
to develop boundaries when it comes to spending and using credit.

4. Pay attention to financial news

Like it or not, improving your relationship with money means understanding more
than you probably do about money and the financial markets. For a lot of people,
this is a complete zone out. When they hear financial news, their brain just
disconnects.

If you are choosing to create prosperity, then I suggest you begin to pay attention
to financial news. Don’t try to absorb it at this point (unless you enjoy it), just
listen to the lingo.

Think of it this way: Financial news is just a series of stories, just like human
interest news – except the characters in these stories are companies and the
people who run them. There are some great stories – some are inspiring, others
can be confusing.

Start by scanning the headlines in the business section of your newspaper.
When you go online, choose one of the sites from the Financial Resources
Section and read the headlines. If a story interests you, read it. Don’t force
anything. Just read the headlines. Some of the information will seep in.

5. Pay attention to prices

Become an informed consumer. Pay attention to the prices that you pay for
things.

Try this: When you go grocery shopping, make an attempt to estimate the
amount of your bill before you get to the checkout station. In order to do this, you
have to pay attention to the prices.

You might also want to relate the prices to the amount of time you have to work
in order to purchase something. For example, if you earn $20 per hour and you

Exercise 3. Identify the Financial Themes in Your Life

In the Introduction, I said that basic to what I teach is the concept that we create our
reality with our thoughts, beliefs and emotions (TBEs) and that in order to change the
outcome of your life stories, it is necessary to change your TBEs. By examining the
stories that repeat themselves in your life, it is possible to decipher which TBEs are the
most active in your creative process. In this book, we are going to focus on the TBEs
that affect your financial condition.

In Exercise 1, I suggested that you define the character you are playing in this lifetime.
As you do this, you will see that there are certain qualities that define your life
expression. For example, you may see that you are a bright and cheery person who
makes others feel good just by being present. Or, you may define yourself as someone
who tends to be judgmental of yourself and others who tends to see life through a
negative, skeptical filter. If there was a tune you could play to describe yourself, it might
be bright and cheery or heavy and sad.

The character that you are playing will also have certain stories that keep repeating.
These stories will be in keeping with the tone of your character. For example, you’ve
probably heard the expression, “Some people have all of the luck.” That defines a type
of character whose stories usually have a positive ending. You probably also know
people (possibly yourself) whose life stories are characterized by struggle,
disappointment and loss.

The good news is that once you identify the themes in your life and the stories that
repeat themselves, you can change them. By identifying the TBEs that are expressing
themselves through your life stories and financial situation and then treating the
discomforts, you can actually change the nature of everything you express.

I have seen it over and over again, both in myself and in my coaching clients. Once an
understanding is gained of why a particular theme repeats itself in someone’s life stories
and the corresponding emotional disturbances are released, the life stories change –
almost without effort. Once it is no longer necessary to express feelings of
disappointment, rejection, loss and abandonment, lives can reflect satisfaction,
acceptance and support.

For example, if you have experienced a series of incidents where the result is that you
feel disappointed, betrayed and discounted, then you can look back through your life to
see where those feelings originated. If there was a traumatic event, or series of events,
that created the original feelings, then you can do EFT on the events and, in effect,
remove your need to express those feelings in the present.

Although TBEs affect every area of your life, we are only going to focus on the financial
aspect of your life in this book. However, be aware that whatever we discuss here can
be applied to other areas of your life.

Some Examples
Identifying the financial themes in your life is an essential part of The Build Your Money
Muscles Program. It’s an extension of the previous exercise where you increased your
financial awareness.

In the coaching work that I do, the first thing I do is to define the financial themes that
people play out in their lives. Once they tell me their money stories, I can help people
see exactly what they are expressing through their money and help them understand
what needs changing.

Because this is so important, I’d like to share a few examples of how this process works.
In all cases, the names of the people involved have been changed.

Impending Doom
Tom D. felt really stuck. He really wanted to change his job, but couldn’t seem to find the
inner strength to make the effort to look for something that would be more intellectually
challenging. He was especially concerned because he had started having sleep
problems and was often irritable. He was often overcome by feelings of anxiety and was
considering going on medication that his doctor suggested.

Tom told me about three incidents in his adult life where he was promised a promotion
and within a short period of time circumstances changed in each of the companies he
was working for and not only did he not get the promotion, he was let go. Tom hated this
kind of drama. He’d be elated because of the promised promotion, then suddenly it
would be yanked away from him and he would be left feeling empty and abandoned,
dealing with feelings of failure.

Tom could see that his anxiety was coming from a feeling of impending doom. As he
looked through his life, he saw other incidents where joy was followed by severe
disappointment. It was no wonder that when something good happened, he expected
something awful to follow.

Tom remembered a Christmas when he was about six. It had been a wonderful
Christmas and he had received all of the things he wanted. For a week, he enjoyed what
he had gotten. Then, without warning, after having a disagreement about money, his
father took all of his presents back to the store and Tom was left with nothing. You can
imagine what a boy of six would have felt under those circumstances.

We did EFT on the incident and Tom’s feelings of impending doom. We also treated
some of his feelings of anxiety. During the session, a lot of emotion came up and Tom
remembered other times as he was growing up when something good would be followed

by something uncomfortable. Between sessions with me, Tom did EFT on all of the
incidents he could remember.

Once the emotional charge behind the causes of feelings of impending doom were
removed, Tom found it easy to look for and secure a new job. His anxiety has been
replaced by feelings of positive anticipation and a new joy has come into his life.

Scared, Abandoned and Alone
Janet D. told me that she had recently lost a source of income that she had come to
depend on. She had a tenant in one of her rental properties who suddenly stopped
paying the rent and moved out. She would have liked to move into the house, but
couldn’t really afford to keep it up herself. The house she was living in needed a lot of
fixing up. She felt scared, abandoned and alone.

Janet told me about another incident that had happened to her seven years earlier that
had a similar ending – she felt scared, abandoned and alone. I asked Janet to go back in
time to as early as she could remember feeling abandoned and alone.

“When I was seven, my parents divorced,” Janet told me. “My mother would leave my
brothers and me in the house alone and one day someone tried to break into the house.
That really scared me.”

As we talked, Janet realized that every seven years she would have something happen
to her that left her feeling scared, abandoned and alone. When she told me the story
about being left alone with her brothers, all sorts of emotion came up. We did some EFT
and Janet was left feeling peaceful and as if something had been resolved.

Janet is now examining other areas in her life where she has created what looks like a
safety net for herself so she can avoid feeling scared, abandoned and alone. She is
much more aware of the underlying dynamic that creates her life stories and is working
to change the dynamic.

Other Themes
Here is a snapshot of some other themes that have been described to me:

Over the years, David P. loaned money to a number of people, all of whom were sure
they were going to pay him back. Few did. David felt used and betrayed whenever this
drama played out. David was able to relate his need to feel used and betrayed to the
way he was treated by his parents.

Doreen T. is a talented artist, but never receives the recognition she feels she deserves.
There are financially successful artists in her community, but she can’t bring herself to
charge more for her work than she does. As a result, she rarely feels that her art is
supporting her. Doreen’s parents were both scientists who had little interest in the arts.
They often felt she was wasting time when she did her drawings. As a result, Doreen
never leaned to value what she created.

Martin S. wants to be a successful stock trader. He always seems to buy and sell at the
wrong time. He came to realize that somehow success has always alluded him, no
matter what he has tried. Martin came to realize that he was afraid to be successful
because it would mean earning more than his father ever earned. Because his father
was a strong, dominating character, the thought of overshadowing his father was very
frightening to Martin. Once he understood this, his trading results gradually improved.

Sam W. earns $100,000 a year in sales, yet he never seems to have enough money. He
owes money on a number of credit cards and has never been able to save much. He’s
45 years old and knows it is important for him to get onto the plus side financially. Sam
was able to see that he was afraid that if he became financially responsible, he would be
all alone. He had many financial dramas with his parents and knew that they loved him
when they helped him out financially.

The stories could go on and on. Now, we are going to examine how you can identify the
stories that hold you back and how you can begin to change them.

Exercise 3. Actions

1. Identify the financial themes in your life.

Imagine that you are telling someone the story of your financial life. You might
want to use your Prosperity Journal to write the story. Or, perhaps you would like
to use a word processing program and write out your financial story.

Let the story just flow, telling stories of what has happened to you financially.
Don’t try to connect the stories. Just tell them. As part of the telling, describe how
you felt at the end of each story. Were you disappointed? Did you feel
abandoned or betrayed, used or manipulated? Did feelings of shame or
embarrassment come up. Or, perhaps you felt you didn’t deserve any more than
you got. If necessary use the Feelings List on page 80.

Also look at the direction in which your life stories move. Do you tend to move in
a positive direction? Or, do you seem to take one step forward and two steps
back?

Then, after you have a series of stories, see if there is a theme. Are there themes
of rescue dramas, lost opportunities, or series of losses. What are the feeling
themes?

As you are writing out your stories, be aware of the feelings as they come up.
Don’t try to stop the feelings. Let them come. Then do EFT on the feelings. This
can have a profound effect on your need to keep repeating the stories. (We will
go into this more deeply in Exercise 4.)

2. Be willing to let go of your stories!

Most of the people I talk to about their financial situations are over 35 years old.
Many are in their late forties and fifties. Invariably, people will describe their
current situation and then tell me about something that happened in their lives
twenty, thirty or forty years ago. The story they tell becomes their reason for
being stuck where they are.

Do you have a story that you tell over and over again that explains who you are
now? Did that story happen a long time ago? Yes, there are stories that were
very painful to live through and often leave what seems like indelible scars, but if
you are willing to give up your story, no matter how painful it might have been,
you will find a new freedom.

I’m sure that many of you have been through therapy of some sort or to support
groups of some kind in order to deal with the pain of your past. I certainly can
relate to that. But, at some point, it becomes necessary to find the willingness to
create a new story – one that isn’t defined by it’s pain and discomfort.
Fortunately, EFT allows for the release of the old stories.

Many of my coaching clients come to realize that the stories they are attached to
have become their excuses for not moving forward. Take a good look at the story
you tell and see if you are using your past to keep you from a prosperous future.

3. EFT for this exercise.

As I mentioned above, it is helpful to do EFT as you identify feelings that are
related to the various themes and stories from your past. You can do EFT in the
manner described in the EFT section, or you can actually tap on the EFT points
as you retell your story.

Here’s an example:
Jane D.’s mother died when she was only ten. The circumstances surrounding
her mother’s death were very stressful. Her mom had been bedridden for about
two years and she required a lot of nursing care. The children had to keep quite
in order not to disturb the mother and Jane often heard, “Don’t make noise,
you’re going to make your mother sicker.”

Jane missed having her mom around and felt very alone. Since her mom got all
of the attention, the children had to get by with a minimum amount of nurturing
from the adults who were in the house. When her mother finally died, Jane’s
father felt that he couldn’t really take care of Jane and her two brothers, so Jane
was sent to live with her grandmother.

Jane never got a chance to really grieve for her mother, or for the life she had to
leave when her mother died. As a result, Jane often experienced situations

Exercise 4. Identify and Release Your Money Feelings

Introduction

This exercise ties in with the previous one. It will enhance your understanding of how
you express emotions through your money.

In the Introduction, I said that we create our life stories with our thoughts, beliefs and
emotions. The is certainly true of our financial stories. So, if your financial situation is a
reflection of your TBEs, what is it that you are expressing?

Let’s review one of the basic concepts that I mentioned in the Introduction:
Money is energy passing between two people, and how you deal with money is how you
deal with your relationships – with yourself and with others.

Just as you have feelings about people relationships, you have money feelings, and they
are usually similar to your other relationship feelings. As a matter of fact, your financial
situation is a means for you to express deep feelings. Once you understand which
feelings you are expressing through your money, you can work to express those feelings
in a healthier manner and change your financial situation.

Think about it –- isn't financial security a feeling? Some people feel financially secure
with very little available cash. Others think they need more even when they have millions
in the bank. Financial security has nothing to do with how much you have. It is about
how you feel.

Your relationship with money can tell you a lot about yourself. For example:

•

If you think other people are going to cheat you financially, you're afraid of
being abused or manipulated.

•

If you're stingy, you're afraid of love/intimacy.

•

If you are worried about running out of money, you're afraid of being left
alone or of abandoning yourself.

•

If you never have enough money, it's because you believe you're not
enough.

•

If you often say, "I'm broke," you feel broken or wounded inside.

•

If you are never able to buy things you want, you feel deprived, usually of
love.

•

If your money is out of control, so are your feelings.

•

If you need to be rescued financially, you may be feeling needy, alone and
unloved

•

If you often borrow money, you think you deserve more than you receive
(emotionally).

•

If, when you look at your bank balance you feel ashamed, you're ashamed
of yourself.

•

When you go to buy something and you get a gripping feeling around your
heart, you're feeling like a bad girl or boy.

•

If money slips through your fingers and you never keep enough for yourself,
you don't think you deserve prosperity.

My experience with hundreds of people has convinced me that the
key to changing financial habits is to identify the feelings that are
expressing themselves through your current money behavior,
money habits and relationship with money.

Once you understand the feelings that you are expressing through your money, you will
understand why you have created your current financial position. You will also
understand why you need your current position, as uncomfortable as it may be. It serves
the purpose of allowing you to express unresolved feelings, many of which you have
probably been carrying around with your from early childhood.

Abandonment Issues
The most common feelings that are expressed through money are those related to
abandonment and rejection.

In the chapter on Money from Prosperity Is an Inside Job, which is available in the free
section of Prosperity Place, it states that you can't run out of money. You can only run
out of people because money is always attached to people. Therefore, if you have a lot
of fears about running out of money, there's a good chance that you are afraid of being
alone and abandoned.

If you have a lot of financial fear, there's a good chance that when you were young, you
felt unsupported on many levels and people you relied on were probably not emotionally
available for you.

When I first moved to Santa Fe, New Mexico, I wondered why so many creative,
intelligent people had such a hard time earning a decent living. Financial discomfort is
very common here. I soon realized that in this community that is populated by many
artisans and followers of alternative lifestyles, there are an unusual number of people
who were the black sheep of their family of origin. As children and teenagers, they rarely
felt supported or appreciated for who they were. Feelings of low self-worth are common.
Understanding this, it makes perfect sense that people here have a difficult time
supporting themselves.

On page 82 in the Articles section of this book, you will find

Abandonment Issues and

Your Money,

which examines this issue more deeply.

Fear of making money
People are often afraid of making money for many reasons. I’m just going to introduce
the idea here and we will look at it more deeply in Exercise 6.

The fear is not of making money, but the effects of making money. If you have been part
of a particular peer group that is not, as a whole, prosperous, when you make
significantly more money than you are making now, people in the peer group will treat
you differently. You will no longer have the same financial fears as your peers, and your
financial focus will be different. Instead of worrying about paying bills, you will be
concerned about investments and tax deductions. You will become a "have" while they
remain "have nots."

People understand this principle instinctively or begin to experience it as they move up
the financial ladder. Because of the fear of being abandoned by the peer group and
being alone, people will often sabotage themselves and find themselves back in their
old, familiar financial position. I've seen it happen dozens of times, either when people
start earning more money or they inherit a significant sum.

This same fear expresses itself for people who are subconsciously concerned about
losing their position in their family of origin. If you have always been the one that needs
help or is rescued by other family members, the fear may be present that if you are self-
sufficient, your family will not know how to treat you and you'll be left alone. Financial
sabotage is often used as a remedy for this fear.

Other common money feelings include:

•

Deprived

•

Unworthy

•

Dread

•

Trapped

•

Disappointed

•

Hurt

•

Angry

•

Shame

•

Guilt

•

Unloved

•

Drained

•

Not enough

•

Betrayed

•

Manipulated

It is important that you be patient with yourself and understand that recognizing and
releasing dysfunctional financial feelings is a process. As with any other process of this
nature, changes start occurring immediately – and they continue over a long period of
time.

It is the process of discovering and changing financial feelings that I consider a spiritual
process because it always leads to inner growth and personal understanding.
In this exercise, I’m going to introduce you to some basic techniques for recognizing and
releasing your destructive money feelings. This is an ongoing process, one that can take

months, or even years, to complete. But, as soon as you start the process, you will begin
to see changes.

Exercise 4 Actions:

1. Learn the

Letting Go Mediation.

The technique taught in this meditation that you will find on page 85 will teach
you how to develop your awareness about what is going on inside of you on a
feeling level.

2. Ask yourself, “What am I feeling?”

When you are feeling uncomfortable financially, stop, sit down with yourself, and
ask, "What am I feeling?"

Travel through your body as you learned to do in the Letting Go Mediation. Use
the

Feelings List

on page 80 to help you identify what you are feeling.

3. Identify the feelings that are often expressed through your money

For example, if you repeatedly have money dramas that leave you feeling
betrayed, disappointed, trapped, frustrated, angry, ashamed, etc., then this is an
indication that you are harboring these feelings that need to be expressed. You
are creating dramas that allow you to express the feelings through your money.

4. When you start worrying about money, rephrase the problem in terms of
relationships.

For example, if you are saying, "I have no money and I'm not generating any
clients," you are probably feeling alone and invalidated. You may be expressing
the thought "Nobody loves me." Or, you may feel disconnected from your Self,
which leads to feelings of aloneness.

5. When you are paying bills or buying something, notice what you are feeling.

Are you feeling fear? What are you really afraid of? Here again, don't use the
word money in your answer. Try to see what is going on in terms of relationships.
If you are afraid of running out of money, it means you are afraid of being alone;
you can't run out of money, you can only run out of people because money is
always attached to people!

6. When did the feelings start?

Once you identify the feelings associated with your money, think back to the
earliest time that you can remember when you felt the same feelings.

Express the feelings to whomever was involved in your life story at the time by
writing a letter that you don't actually send, sharing the feelings with someone
else, or with whatever emotional clearing technique works for you. EFT can be
very effective.

3. Negative thoughts
It's difficult to make money when your thoughts are centered on financial fear. The fear
doesn't solve any problems. It only adds to your difficulty in moving forward. If you spend
a lot of time worrying about money, it's time to train yourself to think in a more positive
way.

4. Unrealistic expectations
You can't imagine how many times I hear from people who feel that they aren't living up
to their potential. I often hear this from people who are doing well, by most standards,
but they want more. They expect more from themselves. A lot of people feel they should
be multi-millionaires and are constantly disappointed with themselves for not reaching
that status.

Imagine, if you can, that you have declared that you are, in fact living up to your potential
and that you are doing the best you can. This doesn’t mean that your life won’t continue
to move forward. It just means that you are willing to experience satisfaction with
yourself and your life in the moment. The paradox is that when you let go and accept
where you are, life will continue to get better and better.

Unrealistic expectations, which create all sorts of pressure to perform, are often the
result of trying to please parents or other people. They also come from attaching your
self worth to your performance. When you can stop pushing yourself and accepting
yourself, the abundance can flow.

Most financial blocks fit into the four categories listed above. Now the question is, how
can these be removed.?

Exercise 5 Actions:

1. Start examining your limiting beliefs.

Limiting prosperity beliefs fall into a number of different categories. For example,
you probably have limiting beliefs about one or more (or perhaps all) of the
following:

•  Yourself and your potential
•  Money
•  Rich people
•  Relationships

By identifying your limiting beliefs, you can begin to address and remove them.
EFT is perfect for this.

In your Prosperity Journal, use a blank page for each of the categories listed
above. On the top of each page, identify one of the categories. For example:
Limiting Beliefs about Myself and My Potential.

Make a list of all of your beliefs that you can identify in each category. Here are
some examples.

•  I’m not very bright.
•  I don’t have enough education to achieve what I want.
•  Other people always seem to have more of what they want than I do.
•  Money is the root of all evil.
•  Money slips through my fingers.
•  Money corrupts people who have it.
•  You have to work really hard to make a decent living.
•  Rich people are arrogant.
•  Rich people are dishonest.
•  It’s lonely at the top.
•  If I have more money than all of my friends, they won’t want to be with me

any more.

•  It isn’t right for me to make more money than my father.
•  People can’t be trusted.
•  I have to give so much in order to be accepted.

Beliefs can be stated as simply as those above, or they can be more complex. I
have compiled a group of beliefs that I identified when I was healing.

You will

find them on page 90.

2. Do EFT on your limiting beliefs

When you do EFT on your limiting beliefs, you will want to address some of the
causes of the beliefs. For example, if you believe that money always corrupts
people (and you don’t want to be corrupted), you can do the setup:
Even though I believe that money corrupts people who have it and I don’t want
money because I don’t want to be corrupted, I deeply and completely love and
support myself.

But, you can also do EFT on something like:
Even though it really upsets me when I see what some corporate executives are
willing to do just to make money, I deeply and completely love and support
myself.

Here’s another one:
Even though I believe that I’ll never have the money I need, I deeply and
completely love and support myself.

This could lead to:
Even though when I was 10, my father told me I was stupid because I got a bad
grade in math and he said I could never succeed, I deeply and completely love
and support myself.

It works best when you can think of something related to a belief that has a real
emotional charge for you.

It is especially important that you look at your beliefs about rich people and how
you developed your beliefs. If you have negative beliefs about wealth and
wealthy people, you will make sure that you don’t join them.

Clearing out your negative beliefs can take time because they can be complex
and have many aspects. Have patience with yourself as you keep working on
these issues.

3. Identify your sabotaging behavior.

Self-sabotage can take many forms. Often it is behavior that goes against and
undermines what you want to accomplish. For example, you are sabotaging
yourself if

• You have a strong desire to succeed in business but are unwilling to learn

basic business skills.

• You want to earn more money but take no steps towards learning how to

take care of money.

• You are running a business of your own and don’t keep track of your

expenses.

•  You want to lose weight and keep on eating junk food.
•  You procrastinate a lot.
•  You keep forgetting to take care of important tasks.
•  You are often late for or forget appointments.
•  You never balance your checkbook.

Get the picture.

But don’t dismay. Self-sabotage is always caused by psychological reversal,
which we discussed in Part 1, and can be eliminated with EFT. The main
problem is that you have to keep reminding yourself to do the EFT in order to
counteract the psychological reversal.

4. Do EFT on your sabotaging behavior.

In order to counteract psychological reversal, you may have to keep reminding
yourself to do EFT, especially for addictions and hard-to-break habits. If you are
trying to lose weight, you might put a note on the refrigerator that says, “Do EFT
instead of eating.” You would then do something like:
Even though I am having an incredible urge to eat the lemon pie in the
refrigerator, I deeply and completely love and support myself.
Do EFT until the urge to eat passes.

You might also want to add the phrase, I choose to treat myself well and skip this
snack. So the setup phrase would be,

Exercise 7. Identify and Release Your Fear of Success

Introduction

At first glance, it may seem odd to talk about the fear of success with people who are
committed to creating a more abundant life for themselves. But fear of success is often
real and can be a major hurdle that must be crossed in order to change the results you
get from your efforts.

There are many underlying reasons for fear of success. These include:

1. Fear of not being able to sustain success.
I have had a number of people tell me that they are afraid to do something really well
because if they do, they might not be able to sustain that level of excellence. They are
afraid that if they have one big success, it will be followed by average or below average
performances. So, rather than deal with this dreaded aftermath of success, they never
perform on a superior level. They maintain an adequate or sub-par performance level, or
do something entirely unrelated to their true heart's desire.

Also, there are plenty of stories about people who became very successful only to lose
most or all of their fortune. So, fear of loss that is tied to success has some basis in
reality. Rather than experience this kind of disappointment, you might avoid success in
the first place.

2. Fear of losing your position in a peer group.
If you are part of a peer group in which everybody suffers financially, and you start
creating financial health and stability, one of the ties that keeps you in that peer group
may be broken and you will no longer feel like you belong in the group. This fear of being
left out or alone would be enough to keep you from realizing your potential.

It is true that many people find that as they climb up the economic ladder and their lives
become more prosperous, the people they connect to change. However, when you are
only considering the consequences of changing your financial position, you often don't
see the new people who will come into your life and you can only imagine being alone.
The fact is, you will find other people with whom to interact and create new and lasting
relationships. You can also redefine your current relationships and set new boundaries
so that they work for you.

3. Fear of losing your position in your family of origin.
If you have maintained a dependant or one-down position in your family of origin, other
members of your family may become uncomfortable as you become independent, strong
and secure. They expect you to act in a certain way and much of your relationship might

be built around those expectations. As your life position changes, you will have to make
a conscious adjustment with your family. The thought of doing this can be frightening.

4. Fear of being punished for being successful.

If in your past you experienced any negative consequences because of a success you
had, you will probably bring the expectation of being punished for your success into your
present.

For example, if a success of yours in some way resulted in a person close to you feeling
inadequate, you might harbor feelings of guilt and shame related to your success. Your
desire not to hurt anyone again might keep you from trying your best to experience
success.

Or perhaps, if you did well at school and were singled out for being bright, creative,
talented, etc., and you found this embarrassing, then you might connect being
embarrassed and humiliated with being successful.

5. Fear of the responsibility that success demands.
Success often brings with it adult responsibilities. First is the financial responsibility.
Money doesn't take care of itself. Every dollar that comes in is a decision that has to be
made. If you don't take care of money, it tends to disappear.

If you buy lots of new material possessions with your new-found money, then you will
have to take care of the things that you chose to buy – a home, clothes, a new car, etc.
These are responsibilities that take time and effort.

If you build a successful business, then you also have responsibility for your employees
and maintaining the infrastructure of the business. If you have avoided responsibility, the
thought of having to do these things can be daunting.

6. Fear of being overwhelmed by a sudden inflow of a lot of money.
This is tied in with the previous item. There is no doubt about the fact that as your money
flow increases, you have to deal with more energy. It's as if money comes in your door
and sits there waiting for you to do something with it. You can't ignore it. And, the more
there is, the more you have to do. Since every dollar is a decision, this can feel
overwhelming.

One of the reasons that people have a reversal of fortune is that they become fatigued
from handling all of the money that comes in with success and prosperity.
Subconsciously, they make it go away so they can retreat to what was a more
comfortable position.

7. Fear that if you make a lot of money, people will only want your money and not
care about you.
There is a common belief that when you have a lot of money, people you know will
perceive you differently and will see you as a source for borrowing money or helping

solve their financial problems. There is also the fear that people will only see you for
your money and they won't understand that you are just as vulnerable as anyone else.

In some ways, these fears are justified and people do view people with money

differently. When you move up the financial ladder, you will learn skills, such as setting
boundaries, that will protect you. Also, as I said before, you will develop relationships
with people who are your financial equals and you won't have some of these feared
problems.

8. Beliefs about what it means to be a wealthy person.

We talked about this briefly in the section on Limiting Beliefs.

If I were to ask you to finish this sentence, "A wealthy person is . . . .," or "Rich people
are . . . ," what would be your response? Would your answer be positive attributes such
as giving, caring, generous, helpful or would you be more apt to use words such as
greedy, arrogant, selfish, dishonest, only lucky, out to get what they can, self-absorbed,
uncaring?

If the unpleasant words are what you would use, then it's possible that you'd rather not

be a wealthy person and you do what you have to do to avoid wealth. These beliefs can
contribute to fear of success.

9. Fear of losing what you have.

You have probably heard stories of people who have become financially successful or
successful in their careers, only to lose everything. This contributes to fear of loss in
others, so there is paralysis rather than action towards a goal.

10. Fear of the unknown and uncertainty.

It is very common to be afraid of moving into the unknown. Not only is it uncertain, it is
unfamiliar. Whatever you are doing now, no matter how uncomfortable you might be, is
familiar to you. You have a belief that if you behave in a certain way, you'll get certain
results. And, for the most part, that is probably true.

You also know that if you live your life in a certain way, you can pretty much count on the
people around you acting in a particular way. Because of this, you know exactly what
you have to do in order to get what you need from others. You have a whole set of
behaviors that you use to insure that your life will continue in a somewhat predictable
fashion.

But, if you want to create a life that is different from what you now have, you are going to
have to give up some of the familiar things in your life and step into the unknown with its
high level of uncertainty. If you keep on doing what you are doing, you will keep on
getting what you have. To get something more or of a different quality, you need to do
something else.

This means stepping into the unknown and embracing uncertainty.

That's why so many people who talk about success, never create it. In order to create
the life they dream of or to reach their goals, they have to do something they have never
done before. People who succeed are those who are willing to take a chance and move
out of their comfort zone and try things that are new, different and uncertain.

As you can see from the above, fear of success is really the fear of the unknown
consequences of success. Whether they are real or imagined, they can affect your
subconscious willingness to create success. The items listed above are enough to keep
many people from realizing their potential.

How to deal with all of this is the object of this exercise. We are going to look at how to
face the fears and then overcome them. As part of this Exercise, I will show you how to
integrate EFT into your process.

Exercise 7 Actions:

1. Define what you mean by success.

What does success mean to you? Is it all about money? Or, are you looking for
creative satisfaction, peace of mind, a sense of security, or some other
intangible?

How will you recognize success when you get it? It's not uncommon for people to
ignore their successes because they are focused on the future and what they
hope to achieve at some vague time beyond the present. If you recognize your
small successes now, you will learn to feel successful. That feeling helps to
generate more success. By dealing with small successes, you can see that there
is no reason to fear the consequences of success.

2. Identify your fear of success

People often avoid facing their fears because, after all, they are frightening. In
order to identify your fears, you have to make a conscious decision to embrace
your fears and work through them. Once you do that, you can release them.

Fears don't just pop up out of nowhere. They can be the result of a traumatic
event or unpleasant personal experience, a belief that was programmed into you,
such as "If you aren't careful, people will take advantage of you," or modeling
behavior of fearful people (parents, teachers, etc.). Fears can go deep into your
psyche and can affect many aspects of your life.

Fears can be cultural or racial. For example, one of the deep fears that relate to
money is the fear of annihilation. This is the gripping dread that you may have felt
when you really felt you were up against a financial wall and had no place to turn.
People of Jewish ancestry are prone to experiencing this fear, not only because

of the holocaust, but because of a long history of persecution and threats of
annihilation.

People who are consciously on a spiritual path often avoid feeling fear because
of the belief that "fear is the opposite of faith." There may be a belief that if you
acknowledge fear that you aren't trusting in whatever higher power you believe
in. Often, when I counsel people in this category, they will want to change the
subject or talk about how they are doing whatever they can to hold on to their
belief that everything is fine.

If you experience a lot of financial insecurity, then I can guarantee that there are
underlying fears, such as fear of abandonment or fear of being alone, that help to
create your life dramas. (See the

article on Abandonment

on page 82.)

Look at the points mentioned in the Introduction to this exercise. Which of these
fears apply to you. Pay specific attention to the fears that relate to your position
in your peer group and family of origin.

3. Do EFT on your fears

As you identify the fears and the incidents that triggered the original fear, do EFT
to help you work through the fears.

I suggest that you listen to the audio from a teleclass I did called Overcoming
Fear of Success. The teleclass will give you a lot of information about how to
identify your fears and how to use EFT to help remove some of them. You can
find a link to the audio at

ProsperityPlace.com/money.

Here are some suggested Setup Phrases:
Even though I’m afraid that if I make a lot of money my family won’t know how to
deal with me, I deeply and completely love and support myself.

Even though I’m afraid that if I have a success, I won’t be able to sustain it, I
deeply and completely love and support myself.

Even though I’m afraid of what I’ll lose if I can’t maintain success, I deeply and
completely love and support myself.

4. Examine your beliefs about wealthy people.

Review what you wrote in your Prosperity Journal about your beliefs about
wealthy people. Do your beliefs generate positive or negative feelings about
wealthy people? If your feelings are negative, why would you want to be
wealthy?

Do some writing about your experiences with wealthy people. How do you feel in
their presence? If you are uncomfortable, when did these feelings begin?

As you examine the various beliefs, you can do EFT on the beliefs or on specific
incidents that relate to the beliefs.

Can you identify any feelings that relate to your not being able to be a wealthy
person? At this point, do you think that you will always be distanced from people
with wealth? If you do, why?

Many people experience an us/them attitude from their parents towards people
with wealth. Have you carried over these kinds of beliefs?

3. Improve your financial literacy.

If you are afraid of becoming successful, especially if it involves making more
money than you are accustomed to making, then it's probably time for you to
start learning about money and investments. The idea of doing this may be
overwhelming for you.

If you are brand new to this arena, start with something simple. Visit some
websites that have free information and free newsletters. Don't try to absorb a lot,
just read the headlines, and an occasional story. In time, it will start to make
some sense.

Some good sites to start with are:

If you want to read a good basic book about stocks and investing, read The
Stock Market Course by George Fontanills and Tom Gentile. (Available at

Amazon.com

There are links to

Online Financial Resources

on page 92.

Exercise 7. Create Realistic Goals

Introduction

Setting goals is a time honored technique for preparing yourself for a successful future.
What we are going to stress here is that you set realistic goals that are in tune with your
personal values and abilities

A lot of people set goals, make an attempt to reach them, then are faced with the
thought of failure when they don't reach their stated goals. By paying attention to who
you are and what you need, your goals can be more reachable.

I’m also going to introduce the idea of setting feeling goals along with specific
performance goals. I have found that by having feeling goals that include safe, secure,
comfortable, satisfied, loved, appreciated and acknowledged, I create whatever I need to
insure that I experience those feelings.

Small Reachable Goals
The idea is to have a larger goal in mind, then set a series of small, reachable goals.
Each time you attain one of your goals, no matter how small the achievement may
seem, you have the chance to experience success.

Start with something simple, that you know you can achieve. Don't decide to loose thirty
pounds when you have always had trouble losing weight. Instead, if you seriously want
to lose weight, you might set the goal of not eating a particular type of food for a day or a
week. Or better yet, to eat something new and healthy for a week. (Incidentally, EFT is
a great tool for weight loss or for overcoming any kind of addiction. There is information
about EFT and weight loss on Gary Craig’s site

www.emofree.com

In terms of financial goals, I suggest that you don't start with "I'd like to triple my income
in one year," or "I want to earn a million dollars in a year." Look at where your life is now
and choose something you could reasonably do. For example, if you have never saved
anything, put aside a dollar, or five dollars, a week for a month. You've changed your
behavior without stressing yourself.

Setting goals requires that you get in touch with what you really want to work towards.
Notice I said, "work towards." I believe that we can achieve anything that we set our
mind to, but it takes effort and focus, especially if the goal is outside of your current
experience.

For example, Let's say your larger goal is to triple your income within five years. If you've
never made that much money before, then you will need new skills to earn and deal with
that kind of money. You will also have to develop a strategy for accomplishing something
you've never done before.

Some Basic Principles:
Here are some basic concepts that can make your goals seem more reachable.

•

Its never too late to start.
I am in my 60’s, a time when many people are winding down. Because I
was sick for many years, I’ve gotten what might be considered a late start.
But that doesn't deter me. My own father started his most successful
business when he was seventy. Colonel Sanders started frying chicken in
his late sixties.

I remember reading a story in Entrepreneur Magazine a number of years
ago about a woman who had been in a family-owned carpet business and
had a falling out with her family. So she started her own business. There
was a picture of her in the magazine driving a forklift truck moving rolls of
carpet. The woman was 92!

•

If you don't have the skills you need to reach your goal, you can get them.
If your strategy requires business, sales, or marketing skills that you don't have
now, you can learn them. If you want to move up the corporate ladder to a better
job, you can gain the skills you need to reach your goal. If you have financial
goals but know nothing about financial markets, you can learn.

You can pretty much do whatever you want, if you are willing to put in the
effort.

•

Assuming a positive outcome makes it possible to achieve a goal.
It's amazing how many people assume the worst. I believe that if you maintain
the image of the outcome you want to achieve, you can eventually reach your
goal. Worrying about what can go wrong is a waste of time. What works is to
program your subconscious with the image of what you want as having
happened and to keep in mind the outcome you desire.

•

Willingness is a key to wealth
In order to move your life in a new, positive direction, you may have to take steps
that are outside of your comfort zone. Actually, it's a pretty safe bet you will have
to do this. Willingness to try new things, take risks with your life, and deal with the
discomfort of change and uncertainty is one of the keys to success.

•

Don't believe that you can't!
The word "can't" never breeds success. Think in terms of "How can I?"

I had a teacher in the fourth grade, Miss Veith, who looked a bit like Miss Grundy
in the Archie comic books. Miss Veith would stand up in front of the room all
hunched over and say, “Don’t be an I-Can’ter.” Then she’d stand up strait and
say, “Be an I-Willer!” That was good advice.

Feeling Goals
Success and prosperity are experiences that include feelings that contribute to a sense
of well-being. A person can have a lot of money but still not feel prosperous. For
example, they might worry a lot about keeping what they have or be bothered by a
sense that there is never enough.

The feelings that go into success and prosperity include:

Satisfaction
Comfort
Acceptance
Feeling that there is enough
Powerful

Inner peace
Self-acceptance and acknowledgment
Self-respect
Self-assured

I’m sure there are others. These are the feelings that I associate with success and
prosperity.

You can set feeling goals, and then work towards those goals. For example, if you want
to feel satisfied, then you can set that as a goal and practice the feeling. Discover what
you are not satisfied with now, either about yourself, others, your situation or your living
space. How can you shift your attitude and, for now, be satisfied?

Many people are afraid to feel satisfied. They think that if they are satisfied with what
they have, they will never have what they really want. The fact is, the more satisfied you
are with what you have, the more apt you are to feel satisfied in the future. Because life
is always changing, if you don’t resist change and opportunities, you will move towards
your goal – feeling satisfied along the way.

Exercise 7 Actions:

1. Get in touch with your values

In your Prosperity Journal, on a clean sheet of paper, write “My Values.” Make a
list of the qualities you value:

Do you value truth, integrity, health, wealth, productivity, fame, solitude? If not,
what do you value? Whatever your answers, be sure to write them down.
Keep in mind there are no right or wrong answers. Whatever is important to you
just is. No one can judge your answers or dispute what you say.

It’s important that you get a clear idea of what you value, because once you do,
you’ll have an easier time making any kind of what-should-I-do decision. If all of
your decisions are value-based, then your work will be a pleasure and you’ll
reward yourself with success. Conversely, if you make decisions that are
contrary to your values, then you won’t feel good about what you’re doing, and
creating success will be difficult.

For example, suppose you value truth and in order to get a particular contract or
job you have to tell a few lies. They don’t even have to be big ones – maybe just
a series of small lies or exaggerations. Your lies will make you uncomfortable,
and somehow you may sabotage yourself or your business. Ralph Waldo
Emerson said, “Nothing gives so much direction to a person’s life as a sound set
of principles.”

What we’re doing here is looking at your principles, your values, so that you can
give your life direction. You may not be able to define your values immediately if
you’ve never done this before. That’s fine. There’s no hurry. You can think about
your values for a few days and mull them over before you write anything down.
There is no right or wrong way to do this. The only purpose of this exercise is to
help you get in touch with you.

Many people live their lives fulfilling the expectations of others. They’re acting out
a part defined by others and are not living their own lives. If you are like most
people, then you have planned your life either to please others or to rebel against
your upbringing. In either case, you are living your life for others, not yourself.
Now is the time to look inside yourself and see what’s in there waiting to be
expressed. It’s time to find out how you want to live your life – for you.

After you’ve made a list of your values, choose five of them that mean the most
to you. Then each day for the next week write a paragraph or two about what that
value means to you.

I know that most people don’t follow through on writing exercises. So, rather than
avoid the process completely, if you don’t want to write, I’d like to suggest that
when you’re driving, or when you’re in the shower or doing some mindless task,
think about one of the values you’ve chosen and ask yourself, “What does this
value mean to me? How would I like my life to reflect this value?”

Once you know your values, then you can make value-based decisions and
these decisions can insure your success. .

2. Let your mind roam free

If money and time were not an issue, what would you do? How would you live
your life?

The most popular answer I get to this question is, “I would travel.” For this
exercise, let’s assume that you will still do something to generate income, and
you have the resources to create whatever source of income you would like.

Would you like to have a business of your own? What would the business be and
what would your day look like?

If you answered, “I’d like to travel,” would you want to turn traveling into a
profitable venture?

If you already have a business, how would you change it, if you would? Or what
would you want to do in addition to what you are doing now? Would you want to
expand your business? Do you want employees or an assistant? Do you want to
work fewer hours?

If you want to work for someone else, what would be the ideal job? What would
the workplace look like? What kind of people would you be working with?

Perhaps you want to have residual income. This would mean that your income
comes from something that generates money without your having to work a
certain amount of time for a specific income. Your income can come from money
you have put aside and is invested. Or, perhaps you see yourself writing a best-
selling book and living off the royalties. Or, you could have income properties that
support you.

Let you mind run free. In your Prosperity Journal, write down whatever ideas
come to your mind without censoring them. If you find yourself saying, "You can't
do that," just let the thought go and continue exploring your ideas.

Take a week, or even two, to complete this exercise.

3. Imagine the idea as real

When you are doing something that doesn't take much concentration, focus on
the fantasy that most appeals to you and imagine that it is happening – that you
are living out your fantasy. Create the details.

For example, if you want to live off the income from money you have put aside,
who would take care of your investments? Would you be part of the process, or
would you rather just play? Think about what you would have to do to learn
enough to be able to understand about investments.

If you want to live off the royalties of a book, imagine the process of writing the
book, which means spending a lot of disciplined time alone. You will also have to
create a book proposal and make the effort to get an agent.

If you have rental properties, who takes care of them? How will you chose the
properties? Is real estate something you already know about or will you have to
learn how to find good investments?

If you want a store, imagine where it is, who your customers are, who will be
working with you. Imagine that you are doing the chores necessary to maintain a
store, such as choosing and stocking inventory, shipping to customers,
advertising, etc.

As you make your fantasy real, try not to negate your ability to create it. Work
from the assumption that you can have what you want. The purpose of this
exercise is to find out if what you think you want is really what you want.

Think about how living your fantasy feels. What gives you joy about it? What
feels like a chore? Would the actual work that you have to do to create your
fantasy deter you from pursuing your fantasy?

When you feel that you are ready, choose the fantasy that most appeals to you
and seems like a way that you would really like to spend your time.

4. Become aware of your feelings.

As you are doing this exercise, be aware of how you feel about living your
fantasy. Does allowing yourself to live your fantasy frighten you in any way? Is
the critical parent in your head criticizing your ideas? Does the I-Can't gremlin
keep interfering? What resistance are you experiencing?

Use your Prosperity Journal to write down the thoughts and feelings. Do EFT to
relieve any discomfort.

5. How much money do you want to earn?

When you say you want to earn enough to be financially secure, how much
would be enough? What would you want as a steady stream of income and how
much of a cushion would you want to have?

In setting goals, think in terms of specific income goals. By doing this, you will be
able to identify some of the discomforts that keep you from actually having
“enough.”

This might seem like a simple question, but it has a lot of complexity. Let’s
assume you choose a number that is many times more than what you are
earning now. What would you do with the money? How would you protect it?
What makes you think it is enough?

If making “just enough” is your habit, then “more than enough” is actually going to
make you uncomfortable and, as many people do, you may find a way to lose it
all. It is important to think this through and then develop the skills – or find the
people who will help you – to manage increasing sums of money.

6. What does earning at your goal level mean.

When I ask people, “How much do you want to earn?”, the answer is often
$75,000, $100,000, or more a year. Some will bravely state, $1 million a year.

Ok, you can have that, but what would you have to do in order to create $1
million a year? What kind of work could you do that pays that kind of money? Or,

would you dream of winning a huge lottery? Are you willing to take responsibility
for caring for $1 million a year? It may seem like a great opportunity to have to
deal with that kind of money, but remember, every dollar is a decision. Do you
want to make that many decisions? If you do, do you have, or are you willing to
get, the knowledge you need to manage $1 million a year. (If you want the
money to last, you can’t just hand it over to a manager. You have to have some
awareness about money.)

7. Now it's time to start creating a goal.

First, what do you want your life to look like five years from now. Think carefully
about this (although whatever you come up with could very well change). The
idea of this and the letting your mind run free, is to give yourself permission to
think yourself into a more comfortable life position.

Assuming that this is what you want your life to look like, what would you have to
do to make it happen? The answer to this may not be easy. You may have to
ponder on this for a while. Think about it a lot, and watch what shows up in your
life. There's a good possibility that new ideas and opportunities will present
themselves.

Spend some time on the Internet and find people who are doing something close
to what you want to do. If possible find a place where people in that field gather,
and talk to them (chat, forum, etc.).

8. Do EFT to overcome discomfort and resistance.

As you are doing some of the actions of this exercise, you are going to come up
against some of your own self-imposed limitations.

For example, as you mind roams free, suppose you picture yourself living in a
large, comfortable house with a beautiful view giving a party to dozens of people
who you enjoy being with. As you are imagining this, a voice in your head my say
things like, “You can’t have that,” or ,”You’ll never be able to afford that,” or “No
one would want to come to your party.”

Stop when you hear the voice and think about what you are feeling at the
moment you hear these negative messages. Do you feel unworthy, trapped,
frustrated and/or sad? Do you hear someone from your family of origin telling you
something like, “You’ll never be rich,” or “It’s wasteful to live in a big house.”

Instead of pushing these messages away, stay with them long enough to do
some EFT and get rid of the emotional charge. It is that charge that keeps you
where you are.

Here are some setup phrases:
Even though I don’t deserve to experience luxury, I deeply and completely love
and support myself.

Exercise 8 .Take Care of Your Money

Introduction

Although this book is about building your money muscles, this is the first exercise that
deals specifically with money. I did suggest that you become aware of your finances on
a new level and that you start writing down your money in Exercise 2, and I suggested
that you take some action to improve your financial literacy in Exercise 6. Everything
else was to prepare you internally for shifting your money consciousness and preparing
to create a new financial situation for yourself.

The internal work that I am suggesting, and will be suggesting in the following exercises,
are all part of the process of building your money muscles. If you do all the preparatory
work, when you start working with money as it starts increasing, you will be comfortable
with the process.

People often say to me, “Don’t worry. I’ll know exactly what to do with the money when I
get it.” The fact is, this is rarely true. After all of the bills are paid off (and there are
usually debts to be taken care of) very few people have any idea what to do with money,
except to spend it. Spending money can be fun, but spending does not create the
financial security that most people desire. Building a solid base takes education and
practice dealing with money.

If you have already started saving money, then there’s a good chance you aren’t making
it work for you as well as it can. Here again, lack of knowledge often holds people back.

People who sustain wealth learn how to make their money work for them. Money can be
a great source of residual income – if you know what to do with it. Although we are not
going to discuss specific investment ideas in this volume, we are going to point you in
the right direction so the idea of taking responsibility for more money than you have ever
had – or sustained – does not overwhelm you.

You need an efficient money-management system
Just like people, money goes to those who love and take care of it. Developing good
money-management skills is essential if you want to deal with large sums of money.

As a matter of fact, one of the reasons people don't create prosperity is that they are
afraid of being overwhelmed by money when it comes in. It's a fact that every dollar is a
decision, and dealing with small sums of money is a lot easier than taking responsibility
for and caring for larger sums.

By developing money skills, you are, in effect, committing to the process of caring for

money. Doing this is one of the basic exercises for building your money muscles. When
you can comfortably take care of smaller sums, you won't be afraid to try larger and
larger amounts.

I was lucky. When I was in my sophomore year of high school, my father had reached a
point of not wanting to deal with having me asking for money all of the time. So he gave
me $1,000 (a comfortable sum in 1956) and told me that the money had to last for a
whole year. I had to buy all of my clothes, school lunches, records and other
entertainment, and whatever else I wanted/needed for the year.

He never took the time to teach me how to budget the money – probably because he
wasn't very good at it. Somehow, I devised a system of writing down whatever I spent
and kept really good records.

Surprisingly enough, my mother, who was a champion bookkeeper when she worked,
never offered any assistance either. I was on my own. It all worked out great, because
by the end of the year I had $300 left over.

Although in later years, I got myself into financial trouble because I was never taught
how to use credit responsibly, the training I had in high school has served me well. I see
how important it is to really pay attention to my money.

It's a lot easier now because of the software that is available. Since all of you have
computers, I'm going to suggest that you use simple money-management software. I use
Quicken and Quickbooks, so I'll stick to those for this discussion. Other programs, such
as Microsoft Money and Peachtree also work well.

Exercise 8 Actions:

1. Start with a commitment

Deciding to take better care of your money is a major decision, not one you can
make casually. If you aren't taking good care of your money now, you are going
to have to develop some new habits, and most people resist this.

So start by writing down the reasons why you are ready to take care of your
money. This reasons might include:

• I'm tired of feeling that I never know where my money goes.
• I hate being afraid that I'm going to bounce a check because I'm not sure

what my balance is. (Or, I hate bouncing checks.)

• I want to make a lot of money and know that I have to learn how to take

care of it.

• I'm willing to grow up!

After you look at all the reasons that it is time to take good care of your money,
whenever you feel ready, write out a commitment, such as: I make a commitment
to take care of my money.

2. Purchase software such as Quicken or MS Money and find someone to teach
you how to use it.

I think Quicken is really great. After I enter what I have spent, in an instant, I can
see where my money goes. There are categories that you can set up to help you
track everything.

Set up a separate account in Quicken for your checking, savings/money market
(if you have any), cash, and each of your credit cards. If you have investments,
you can also track them here. You can keep track of mortgage payments and
any other kind of money account you might have.

No matter how little money you might have, using software is appropriate. It will
really help you get over financial vagueness.

What I love about Quicken is that it takes me about ten minutes to reconcile my
checking account or credit card accounts. A real no-brainer.

3. If you already have software set up, make sure that you are using it on a regular
basis.

Set up a schedule for dealing with your money. I like to do it almost every day. If
you are in business, this is important.

4. Separate your business and personal money

If you have your own business, be sure that you are not mixing the funds. Even if
your business is a sole proprietorship, you want to keep separate records and
separate checking accounts for tax purposes. ("Want" may be the wrong word,
but it is the best thing to do.)

For my businesses, I use Quickbooks, although Quicken for Small Business can
often suffice for a home-based business. You will have to do some research to
see what is best for you. If someone else does your taxes for you, ask them
which they use. Many accountants let you just give them your Quickbooks file
and they work from that. (It took me about twenty minutes this year to get ready
for the accountant. What a blessing!)

5. Keep track of your money on a daily basis.

As I suggested in Exercise 2, get a small note pad and carry it with you all of the
time – or use your organizer or Palm Pilot if you use one.

While you are training yourself, write down everything you spend cash on. If you
have trouble remembering to write down the checks you write in your check
register, use duplicate checks.

You don't have to transfer all of the little things you spend money on into your
money-management software. You can add up the incidentals and mark them as
Misc. Personal Expenses.

Do have separate categories for clothing, food, etc. In Quicken, I have a
category, Joan Personal, that further breaks down into food, clothing, shoes,
Lucky (my dog), household.

6. Do monthly totals.

At the end of the month, run a report, so you can see what you spent in each
category. Once you identify your spending habits, you can make conscious
decisions about what you want to do with your money.

If you aren’t using a computer, do a Monthly Review using the

Monthly Expense

Record

. (In the Tools Section, page 76.)

7. Balance your checking and credit card accounts.

Give yourself up to one week after your statements arrive, then go into your
software and reconcile the accounts. I find that if I do it within a day or two, I can
get it out of the way and not have to have it on my mind.

8. Deal with your debt

Debt and prosperity are opposites. If you want to improve your relationship with
money then you will have to deal with your debt. The first step is to get out of
denial about your debt and fill in the actual numbers on the Net Worth Form.

If the thought of doing this is frightening, then there are definitely deeper issues
that have to be dealt with. You can do this with EFT. But you may also have to
work with a credit counselor.

Ask yourself, how would I feel If I could no longer use any credit? If you are
uncomfortable with the thought, especially if using credit creates worry for you,
then you have to deal with the issues in order to move forward.

One of the resources I suggest to people who are dealing with large debt that
seems overwhelming is a site called

Myvesta.org

. They have helped many

people deal with their debt.

Worrying about your debt will never get you out of debt. Dealing with your debt in
a straightforward manner will.

A debting habit that is not under control is a serious problem. I highly recommend
Debtors Anonymous for those of you who have serious debting or spending
issues. You can find a meeting online or in your area by going to

http://debtorsanonymous.org/

Exercise 9. Support Yourself On Every Level

Introduction

Financial health is an extension of your physical, emotional and spiritual health. Creating
enough money to support yourself, is a reflection of the support your receive on other
levels of your life – support from yourself and others.

How Are You Willing to Support Yourself?
I’m going to suggest that you use the

Support Assessment Tool

on page 81.

If there are items on the Support Assessment where you scored 3 or less, are you willing
to do something to turn them into a 4 or 5?

The question really is, are you willing to do what needs to be done to support yourself?
When you are supporting yourself in all aspects of your life, you will also support yourself
financially. The more you support yourself, the better you will do financially.

Before we move on to suggested actions, it's important for me to emphasize that
changing beliefs and how you support yourself takes time. I'm sure that many of you
wish there was a quick, easy fix. There isn't. At least not one that has lasting effects.

The journey to financial wellness is one of the greatest things you can do for yourself,
but you will need patience while you go through the process of change. The process
itself is what matters because, in reality, it never ends.

Your process will be successful if you learn to love and support yourself at every step –
and to be satisfied with yourself, wherever you are.

Exercise 9 Actions:

1. Fill out the Support Assessment Tool

The

Support Assessment Tool

on page 81 will help you see how much you are

supporting yourself on every level.

Spend at least a week watching yourself to see in what areas listed on the
Support Assessment Tool you support yourself and don't support yourself. After
one week, choose one area that you'd like to work on first.

For example, if you see that you aren't supporting your physical body, perhaps
you'd like to start working on that first. Or, perhaps you would like to start treating
yourself in a more loving, supportive way.

2. Do the following exercise at least once a day:

Stand in front of a mirror and look into your eyes. Say, out loud,
" _________ (your name), I unconditionally love, accept and support you just the
way you are."

This can be very powerful. You may find that it brings up a lot of emotion.

Accepting and supporting yourself just the way you are does not mean you aren't
going to change. It just means what it says: that you are willing to love, accept
and support yourself in this moment of time.

4. As you go about your day, become conscious of your actions and decisions.

Whenever you remember to do so, ask yourself, "Does this support me and give
me what I need?

5. Transform your actions and decisions.

If your actions and decisions do not support you, what do you need to do to
change them into something more supportive?

I suggest that you write out a list of things you can do to support yourself.

You will find that people around you expect you to act a certain way because
that's what you have done in the past. If you begin to say "No" to people who
expect you to say "Yes," they may get uncomfortable and try to push you into a
place you don't want to be. As you assert your rights to not do something,
remember, “No” is a complete sentence.

This is the perfect opportunity for you to stand up for yourself and support
yourself. It may be frightening to do this, and people who use and abuse you may
abandon you, but that's what you need in order to fill your life with supportive
people. Once you start supporting yourself, you will see seeming miracles begin
to happen.

One of my favorite sayings that I often used when I started supporting myself
was, “If one of us has to be uncomfortable, it doesn’t have to be me.”

6. Be more supportive of others!

This may seem like a strange step to take in order to support yourself, but this
can be a very important action to take. There are lots of clichés that support this
concept, including:

•

What goes around, comes around.

•

You get what you give.

•

Do unto others as you would like others to do unto you

From a spiritual perspective, If you believe that we are all one being, then being
supportive of others is a way to support yourself.

7. Support your inner child

The part of you that feels uncomfortable and is expressing deprivation, lack of
self worth, fear of abandonment, etc. is the inner child that is within you and is
carrying the wounds of your past. Giving the inner child the love and support he
or she needs is an important part of the financial healing process.

Try this exercise:
Sit in a comfortable chair with your eyes closed. Take a few deep breaths to
relax.

Imagine that you are traveling deep into your heart. As you approach your heart,
imagine that you see yourself as a small child in a large room. At first the room is
empty. Then, the child realized that in this room he/she has special powers and
can fill the room with whatever he/she would like – a comfortable place to sit,
toys to play with, bright images on the wall, etc.

Ask the child how he/she feels.

Then, imagine that you, as an adult, walk into the room and sit next to the child.
Put your arms around him/her, or pick up the child and hold it lovingly. Tell the
child that you love him/her and that you have come to give it the help that it
needs. Ask the child what it needs?

Dialog with the child and make an agreement to do what needs to be done to
make the child comfortable. Agree to connect to the child on a regular basis and
pay attention to what it has to say.

Like many of the other exercises in this book, supporting yourself is ongoing, not
something you can do once then move on to something else. While you are doing this,
hopefully, you will still be paying attention to your money feelings, examining your
values, writing down your money on a regular basis, etc.

The exercises in this book are a pathway to prosperous living. If you need to change
your approach to life and what you expect from life, it is going to take time and effort.
That's why so many people, no matter how much they wish they could "have it all," never
get it. They aren't willing to make the effort, and they don't have the patience to let life
take its course as they move into a new paradigm.

It saddens me when I see people give up and decide to get less from life than they can,
especially once they understand that the power to change is within them.

Way back in the '70s when doctors told me I would never be healthy and to learn to live
with all of my physical and emotional discomforts, I decided that I would do whatever I

Part 3. Prosperity Tools

Your Money Profile

1. Check all that apply to you.

__ I am financially comfortable and invest my surplus.

__ I am financially comfortable and invest my surplus, but would like to earn more.

__ I have enough to meet my needs and enjoy myself, but not enough to invest for the future.

__ I earn enough to pay all of my bills and not create any debt, but there isn't enough for extras or

saving. There is just enough, but no more.

__ I'm very careful with my money and have enough to meet my needs. But, I wish I could be a little

more free with my money.

__ I am very stingy with my money and hate to spend it.

__ I earn enough to pay all of my current expenses, but I have a student loan that has to be paid and I

don't ever seem to have enough for that.

__ I often spend more than I earn in a month and use credit cards to make up the short-fall.

__ I work for myself and am always afraid that there isn't going to be enough.

__ I often don't have enough for my monthly bills and have to get extensions from my creditors.

__ I'm deeply in debt and feel like I'll never be debt-free.

__ I have considered bankruptcy.

__ I know I'm not earning as much as I'm capable of earning.

__ I don't like to pay taxes and don't declare my true earnings.

__ I shop a lot - and often buy things that I do not need.

__ I often lend money to other people.

__ I often lend money to other people. Many of them don't pay me back.

__ I wish my parents/siblings/relatives would share some of their money with me.

__ I rarely balance my checkbook.

__ I'm not sure how much I owe creditors.

__ When I get the urge to buy something, I do it right away.

__ I'm ashamed of the way I deal with money.

__ I don't know enough about how to invest money.

__ I don't know enough about how to invest money and find the topic very boring.

Is there another description you would like to add about your financial behavior?
Write about it here or on a separate sheet of paper.

Back to Exercise 1.

Net Worth Form

Print out this page and fill in the appropriate information. The version of
this page that is on ProsperityPlace.com will do all of the math for you
and email back the completed information to you. To access the form, go
to:

www.ProsperityPlace.com/money

Personal Net Worth

ASSETS (What You Own):

Cash on hand

Cash (Savings)

Cash (Checking)

Money Market Accounts

Certificates of Deposit

Stocks

Bonds

Mutual Funds

Retirement Accounts

Clothing (market value)

Jewelry & Furs (market value)

Furniture (market value)

Collectibles (market value)

Automobiles (market value)

Boats/Airplanes, etc.

Home/Personal Residence (market value)

Other Real Estate (market value)

Cash Value of Life Insurance

Other

TOTAL ASSETS

LIABILITIES (What You Owe):

Total Credit Card Debt (Use the form below to calculate)

Mortgage on Your Home

Other Mortgages

Home Equity Loan

Automobile Loan(s)

Other Loans outstanding

Outstanding Bills

Tax Liability

Other

TOTAL LIABILITIES

NET WORTH

Total Assets (from above)

Total Liabilities (from above)

Net Worth $

Credit Card Debt

Fill in the information in the table below. Add the total to the first line in the Liabilities
table

Name of Card

Account Number

Amount Owed

Total Credit Card Debt

Back to Exercise 1.

Monthly Expense Record

Each of the blank columns represents a month. Fill in the month/year at the top of the first row.

Housing

Mortgage Payment

or Rent

Second Mortgage

Gas & Electric

Phone

Water

Trash Removal

Cable TV

Maintenance/Repairs

Equipment

Homeowners

Insurance

Cleaning Services

Gardening Services

Other __________

Total Housing

Automobile

Car Payment 1

Car Payment 2

Insurance

Gas

Maintenance

License(s)

Other __________

Total Auto

Insurance

Life

Health

Disability

Other ___________

Total Insurance

Food/Groceries

Groceries

Restaurants

Other ___________

Total Food

Medical

Doctor

Dentist

Vision Care

Medicines

Veterinarian

Other ___________

Total Medical

Personal

Hobbies

Hair Care

Clothing

Cleaning/Laundry

Movies/Video Tapes

Entertainment

Travel

Health Club

Child Care

Other ___________

Total Personal

Taxes

Federal

State

Other ___________

Total Taxes

Loans

Personal

Credit Card

Payments

Other ___________

Total Loans

Miscellaneous

Contributions

Savings

Dues

Tuition

Alimony/child

support

Other ___________

Total Misc.

TOTALS

Housing

Automobile

Insurance

Food

Medical

Personal

Taxes

Loans

Miscellaneous

GRAND TOTAL

Support Assessment Tool

Print this page. Next to each question, place a number that
corresponds to the following:

1= never 2=seldom 3=occasionally 4=often 5=always

Score

Question

____

I generate enough income to meet all of my needs (food, clothing, shelter, utilities, car,
car insurance, health insurance, health care).

____

I generate enough income to satisfy many of my wants.

____

I surround myself with people who appreciate and acknowledge me.

____

My self-talk is mostly positive.

____

I enjoy what I do to generate income.

____

I am able to set boundaries and say "no" when people ask more than I am willing to
give.

____

I eat fresh, whole foods.

____

I eat at least five servings of fresh fruits and vegetables each day.

____

I exercise on a regular basis.

____

I relax at least one hour a day.

____

I have leisure-time activities that I enjoy.

____

I spend time in nature.

____

I spend time with my family or friends.

____

I am able to ask for help when I need it.

____

I learn new skills or stretch my mind on a regular basis.

____

My relationships are generally loving and satisfying.

____

I am able to express my emotions.

____

I feel that God, The Universe, or whatever else I believe in gives me the support I need.

Scoring

• If your score is above 85, you are doing a superb job of supporting yourself.
• If your score is 68 to 84 or above, then you are doing a good job of supporting

yourself.

•

If your score is 67 or below, then it's probably a good bet that you feel that
you have less than you need to live a satisfying life.

Back to Exercise 9.

Part 4. Articles

Abandonment Issues and Your Money

Because feelings of abandonment play such a large role in financial discomfort, I want to
expand on the concept here. Over the years, it has become clear to me that the most
common emotion that people act out through their money is the feeling of abandonment.

Think about how many life-dramas have abandonment as one of the elements. From
feeling emotionally abandoned by parents who didn't have emotional tools to the pain of
being abandoned at the end of a love relationship, just about everyone in our culture
understands abandonment.

Some have had more extreme dramas than others, but we all have experienced
abandonment. It is so common that we rarely notice or talk about it. Many people are
aware of feelings of loneliness or alienation, which are the result of feeling abandoned.

How does this sense of abandonment affect your relationship with money?

Let's do a little review:

• Money is always attached to people -- it doesn't have any power by itself.
• You can't really run out of money, you can only run out of people, who are

the source of money.

• So fear of running out of money, is the fear of running out of people, or

being abandoned and alone.

Difficult financial situations are often characterized by feeling alone and abandoned. My
theory is that when you address your deep-seated feelings of abandonment and
aloneness, you won't have financial difficulties.

A seemingly simple solution for a complex problem.

Think about how you behave and what actions you contemplate taking when you are
financially uncomfortable.

Do you use too much credit or think about getting a loan? If I owe you money, then I
know that you aren't going to forget about me. I borrow money to feel connected to
someone. (People lend money for the same reason.)

If you have a history of needing to be rescued by friends or family members, that's a
sure sign that you are feeling alone and abandoned. Once someone rescues you, you
feel less alone – at least temporarily.

People often feel abandoned by God, life, authority figures, etc. I know one woman
whose life is just a series of abandonment dramas and she feels totally powerless to

stop the movement of her life towards this constant abandonment. She's always in a
victim position and seeks out men who want to rescue her. Her neediness is so extreme
that they rarely play the role she needs for more than a few weeks.

Do you remember when Donald Trump was going through his divorce from Ivana? His
whole empire almost fell apart. It is very common for people who are going through
divorce, or are grieving for whatever reason, to have financial problems. It is the
expression of abandonment and aloneness.

How you can tell if you are acting out abandonment through your money
See if any of these apply to you:

• You often borrow or lend money
• People to whom you lend money rarely pay it back (elements of

betrayal may be at work here too.)

•  You worry constantly about running out of money
•  You work hard, but never get paid what you know you are worth
•  You lose money on investments
•  You have a hard time finding customers for your products or services
•  You started making more money, but now you are right back where you

started

•  You had to close a business or went bankrupt
•  You have a hard time supporting yourself
•  You think that the only way out of your difficult situation is for someone

to rescue you financially

• You work all of the time because you are afraid that if you don't, you

won't make enough money.

Self Abandonment
When you start looking at your abandonment issues you are bound to go back to
abandonment dramas in your family of origin. Virtually everyone can find them --
especially if you look at your life from a child's point of view, which is when patterns are
formed.

For example, you probably felt abandoned on your first day of school. Or when you
realized that one or both of your parents left you every day (to go to work). Or when you
were really upset about something and no one seemed to care.

But the core of your current abandonment issues may lie in the way you abandon
yourself on a regular basis. Signs of self-abandonment include:

• People-pleasing behavior. You do what you think others expect of you or you

adjust your actions to please others.

• You never follow your inner urges to do what you really want to do because

of fear of failure, rejection or just general fear.

•  You don't speak up for yourself or defend yourself when criticized by others
•  You remain in an abusive relationship (either business or personal)
•  You do something that goes against your personal values.

Letting Go Meditation

This meditation is a combination of an ancient Zen Buddhist technique and bio-
feedback. It's an excellent way to connect to your internal world.

Here's how to do it:

Start with this Basic Meditation:

• Sit in a chair with your back straight and ankles crossed or in a comfortable

cross-legged position on the floor. Fold your hands gently in your lap and close
your eyes.

• Take a few deep diaphragmatic breaths. Then let your breathing find its own

level.

• Imagine that a beam of rainbow light is entering the center of your forehead. You

don't actually have to see anything (although you may), just imagine the
presence of a light. Imagine that the light travels down the center of your body
and diffuses into all of your cells.

• Repeat silently to yourself a few times, I am in The Light, I am filled with The

Light.

• Do this for a minute or two.

After you feel connected to the light, take a deep breath. Then turn your attention to your
jaw. Observe how it feels. Do you feel tension or is it relaxed? Does the right side feel
any different from the left? Do you feel any pain or discomfort? Don't try to change
anything. Just observe until it changes.

If you wait long enough, there will be a change. It may be very subtle, but it will occur.

Once you feel a change, wait a few seconds, then say to yourself, "My jaw is relaxed."
As you say this, imagine that you're letting go of some of the tension. As you imagine
your jaw relaxing, say to yourself, "Let go, let go." Keep repeating this phrase. When you
think your jaw has relaxed, let go again. And again. Do this for about two minutes or
more. If your mind wanders, gently bring it back.

Repeat the process with your shoulders, solar plexus (the center of your abdomen under
your rib cage) and the center of your chest, which is your heart chakra. At first, you may
not feel much, especially if you're generally out of touch with your feelings.

You can use this meditation to scan your entire body, going from your head down to your
toes, stopping to observe each body part. You can spend as much or as little time on
each part as you want. Sometimes I spend 15 minutes or more in one location. At other
times, I scan my entire body stopping only for 30 to 60 seconds at each location.

CHANGING YOUR THOUGHTS

Recently, I was talking to a 52-year-old fellow named Luke who was complaining about
his lot in life. It seemed that no matter what he did, nothing worked out the way he
hoped. Luke wasn’t happy with his demanding job, and people rarely appreciated what
he did. He felt he wasn't paid what he was worth, and it wasn't unusual for people, both
at work and in his personal life, to take advantage of him.

Luke's company is starting to lay off workers and he's afraid that he's going to get a pink
slip. He worries about this a lot, and can't imagine what he'll do if he gets laid off.
Imagine, if you will, what it must be like inside of Luke's head. You can bet that his days
are not filled with bright, cheery thoughts. Luke is more apt to focus on what tragedy
might befall him than about what he has to be grateful for.

Although Luke senses that he may be in line for a pink slip, he spends his thinking time
worrying rather than being proactive and exploring his options. He isn't planning for the
future, he's fearing it and becoming paralyzed.

If, as the ProsperityPlace.com theory states, we create our lives with our thoughts,
beliefs and emotions (TBEs), then what is Luke creating for himself? Clearly, it's not a
pretty picture.

What is the nature of your thoughts? Given what you think about most of the time, what
is the life that you are creating?

When I first started healing, I realized that in order to move my life forward, my thoughts
would have to be positive at least 51% of the time. Instead of feeling sorry for myself,
comparing my lot in life to others who seemed more fortunate, or worrying about my
future, my thinking time had to be constructive and productive.

Your thought patterns, like just about everything else in your life, are a habit. Changing
to a new way of thinking will probably take some time and will definitely take effort –
unless you have a genie in the wings willing to grant your every wish.

I'm going to make some suggestions, and if you follow them, I can just about guarantee
that you are going to achieve more of what you want.

Here's what it takes:

1. First decide if you are ready to make a commitment to change the way you
think. If you aren't going to make the commitment, you won't get very far with this.

2. Start observing your thoughts.
If you aren't accustomed to observing your thoughts, then you'll have to learn this skill.
It's a great exercise in personal growth because it leads to self-knowledge. If you need
to, put up notes on your mirror, computer, car visor, refrigerator, or any other obvious
place that will act as reminders for you to take a moment to watch your thoughts.

You might want to try the Watching the River meditation that you will find at

http://www.prosperityplace.com/gethigh.html

3. When you find your self sitting on the pity pot or in a fearful place, replace your
thoughts with something else. The replacement thought doesn't have to be earth
shattering. Just positive. It doesn't have to relate to what you were thinking about. It just
has to be positive.

Look around you and find something that is worthy of a nice thought -- a flower, a pet,
puffy clouds in the sky, anything that appeals to you.

Or, tell yourself something nice about yourself. You don't even have to totally believe
what you are saying. Just be nice and positive.

Or find something in your life to be grateful for. I love the saying, "A man who has no
shoes is glad he has his feet."

4. Use affirmations.
There were times that I would do positive affirmations for four or five hours a day. I
would do anything to get the negative thoughts out of my head. The article Affirm It has
some suggestions.

ProsperityPlace.com/biz/affirm.html

I felt it was especially important to identify the needs my destructive behavior was
satisfying, such as my need to feel poor and alone. As you will see in the Affirm It article,
emotional needs can be addressed through affirmations.

5. Take a few minutes each day to write about your thoughts and how they are
changing.
Use your Prosperity Journal for this.

At the end of each day, take a few minutes to evaluate the nature of your thoughts for
that day. Don't judge yourself. Just observe the nature of your thoughts and write about
what you observe.

6. Be patient with yourself.
If you berate yourself for having negative thoughts, that's just adding more negative fuel
to the fire.

Convoluted Beliefs

I’m afraid to tell you, “I need to be touched.”
Instead of asking you to touch me, I ask you for money.

When I try to please you, you ridicule me.

You also minimize my accomplishments.

If I’m only worthy of ridicule,

I must not be worthy of having my accomplishments acknowledged.

Since people show their acknowledgment and appreciation by giving money, I’m not worthy of
being given money for what I do.

If I have a savings account and pay all my bills on time,

It means I’m taking care of myself.

I tried to take care of myself and protect myself when I was little,

But you ignored me.

I felt powerless and thought I couldn’t take care of myself.
Since I can’t take care of myself, I can’t have a savings account and pay all of my bills on time.

If I pay my bills late, you notice me.
If I pay my bills on time, you ignore me.
To get you to notice me, I pay my bills late.

Because I didn’t get touched, I feel deprived.
By not having enough money to buy the things I need, I can express my deprivation.
If I keep telling you that I haven’t got enough money to buy what I need, you’ll know that I feel
deprived.

I want to be rescued because that’s a way for me to get people to acknowledge that they care
about me.

If I pay my bills on time, you won’t know that I still hurt or that I’m still here.
I'm afraid that my creditors will call me.
But when they call me, I know they care and know I’m here.
I can also tell them how uncomfortable I am and how difficult things have been.

If I’m successful, that will make you feel inadequate.
I don’t want to hurt your feelings, so I won’t be successful.
I make more money than you ever did, so I’m hurting your feelings.
So I better do something to hurt me to punish me for hurting you.

Back to Exercise 5.

EFT Resources

Use the following EFT Resources to increase your knowledge of EFT and how it is used.
Be sure to download the free EFT manual that you will find on Gary Craig’s site.

Gary Craig’s site –

www.emofree.com

The best compilation of information by the founder of EFT. Download the manual, read
case history, order tapes, sign up for Gary’s email list and more. All of the videos are
good. If you only get one, I suggest The Palace of Possibilities.

Paul Cutright’s Audio Course –

www.emotionalfreedomtraining.com

An online audio version of Paul’s five-day teleclass that teaches EFT techniques. Well
worth the $49 cost of the course.

Patricia Carrington’s Choices Manual –

www.eft-innovations.com

When you visit Gary’s site, you will see a lot of information from Patricia, who often
contributes to the mailing list. Patricia has extended the EFT techniques by adding what
she calls Choices to the routine. Her manual will teach you her technique. Very useful.

Sylvia Hartman’s Adventures in EFT—

www.starfields.org

Sylvia’s manual on EFT is quite extensive and has information about treatments for a
wide range of discomforts. Introduction by Gary Craig.

Association of Meridian Therapies –

www.theamt.com

A variety of articles about various Energy Psychology techniques.

Animal Energy Healing –

www.animaleft.org

Techniques to use with your pets.

Online Financial Resources

IVillage.com’s Money Section –

www.ivillage.com/money

Helpful information about dealing with debt, investing, support group links and much
more.

Myvesta.org

Lots of information, classes, services for people who are serious about dealing with their
debt.

Financial Power Tools -

www.financialpowertools.com/

Calculators. Mortgage, debt, credit cards and more.

The Money Page –

www.moneypage.com

Information and links.

About.com’s Credit/Debt Management Section.

credit.about.com

Lots of helpful links.

Debtors Anonymous –

www.debtorsanonymous.org

For those of you who have a debting problem.

Financial Portal Sites

CBS Marketwatch.com

Yahoo’s Finance Site –

finance.yahoo.com

CNNfn –

www.cnnfn.com

MSN Money –

moneycentral.msn.com

Free Investment Information
Motley Fool –

investor.stockpoint.com

Morningstar.com

– Mutual fund ratings.

Subscription Sites
Zacks Advisor – 2 week trial –

www.zacks.com

Investor’s Business Daily – 2 week free trial –

www.investors.com

Wall Street Journal – 2 week free trial –

www.wsj.com

Resources on Prosperity Place

Private Section
On the password protected portion of ProsperityPlace.com, you will find

•  Additional articles including a Starting Your Own Business section
•  A Net Worth form that will do the calculations for you
•  Audio of a Fear of Success teleclass
•  Free downloads of the e-books Starting Your Own Business and Nourish

Yourself

• Free audio – Let Go & Relax, Healing Your Feelings

Access the password protected site at

www.ProsperityPlace.com/money

with the

password that was emailed to you when you purchased this book.

Public Section

On the public section of ProsperityPlace.com, you will find lots of articles to help you
create a better relationship with money.

It is strongly suggested that you subscribe to the free ezine, Prosperity Tips, which
has helpful articles and information. Be sure to read the past issues that are indexed
at

www.ProsperityPlace.com/hl/.

Coaching Services

Learn about Joan’s coaching services at:

www.ProsperityPlace.com/coach

Prosperity Is an Inside Job

For a more detailed discussion of how you create your reality with your TBEs and
how to make internal changes, read Joan’s book Prosperity Is an Inside Job.

www.ProsperityPlace.com/moreinfo.html

Let us hear from you

Tell us what you think of this program, or ask questions at

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